Caught in a dream
by bloodyXwhiteXrabbit
Summary: After having fallen into a temporary coma, Damian is dealing with the aftermath and with a lot of family issues.  Seperate chapter for every person close to Damian.
1. First dream

**Update: **After reading the reviews, i decided to make this a multi-chapter fic. (It will take some time though :S)  
>I want to show more interactions between all of the involved characters.<br>I think there will be a chapter for each of them, and there will be some changes on this one as well. i will add a scene, in which Dick says goodbye to Dami.  
>I really thank you for the reviews and i will try hard to do even better :)<p>

My first Batman story :D  
>I totally fell in love with Damian right away, he is so awesome.<br>In my opinion Dick would be a better father...

_thoughts are italic_

General music i recommend for this : goodbye apathy - One Republic

Part 2: la familia - Mirah

**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything :(

* * *

><p>"ROBIN! Use the gas mask!" Batman a.k.a. Bruce Wayne yelled at the boy wonder next to him.<br>Robin a.k.a. Damian Wayne obliged and put the mask on with one hand while throwing a sonic batarang at one of the thugs, disabling his gun.  
>"What kind of gas is this?" Robin asked as he struck down his opponent with a high kick.<br>The dark knight observed the victims of the gas while he fended off three armed thugs.  
>The civilians were either lying on the ground motionless or crying and screaming, babbling nonsense.<br>"My first guess would be a hallucinogen. The victims don't die but enter a state of apathy or lose their minds. I think it's similar to scarecrow's gas."  
>They both continued fighting against the dozen of thugs, trying to rip them apart, when suddenly one of them distanced himself from the crowd and attempted to flee.<br>That was the Riddler's spy; Robin realized and wanted to go after him.  
>"Robin! Where do you think you are going?"<br>Robin ignored him and chased after the spy.  
>The chase ended suddenly when the thug found himself running straight into a brick wall.<br>Huffing amused Robin waited for the thug to get up again.  
>"Dead end you idiot. And don't think you'll get away from me."<br>The thug chuckled.  
>"You are just a kid, what do I have to fear from you?"<br>Raising his baton, Robin smiled calmly.  
>"Oh you have to fear a lot from me, pal. Batman knows mercy, unlike me."<br>He raised it even higher, and just as he wanted to go in for the kill, he hit the pavement.  
>The last thing he realized before losing consciousness completely was a strange unknown odour and a calm voice talking to him.<p>

"Riddle me this little robin, I travel by night and fade by day, what am I?"  
><em><br>A dream_, he thought

"Now little robin, a little hint. It will be your last and eternal."  
><em><br>Well, fuck_

* * *

><p>"Robin?"<br>When the dark knight saw his son lying on the floor motionless and covered in blood that streamed out of his head, his heart stopped still and he held his breath.  
>Oracle had to be contacted right away. With one hand he fidgeted with his headset and checked the boy's pulse with the other.<br>"Batman? This is Nightwing, Oracle is not here at the moment."  
>"Di… Nightwing? I didn't know you were back already."<br>His oldest protégé had announced his return to be next week, but maybe this was a positive turn of events.  
>"Nightwing, get your Bird over here and tell Alfred to prepare for surgery."<br>Bruce knew that Dick would know right away that Damian was the problem, since Batman was all right, and the panic in Dick's voice betrayed himself.  
>"What happened? Is Robin okay?"<br>"He got his head bashed in…"  
>Dick cursed<br>"… but he is alive, barely but I think he'll make it. What worries me is the gas he's inhaled."  
>"Batman I am on my way already. Just…"<br>"I'll take care of him until you arrive, Nightwing."  
>"Thank you…"<p>

It was a somehow bizarre situation. Bruce was Damian's father, but he knew that Dick cared a lot more for the little boy.  
>During his absence Dick had taken care of Damian and they had bonded a lot, even accomplishing Damian to warm up to other people a bit.<br>So it was natural for Dick to worry like a mother over his little brother, but it was unnatural that Bruce didn't worry half as much.  
>He knew the boy was going to survive. That was all that mattered.<br>In a way, his inability to worry for his own son hurt him more than the fact that Damian had just gotten his head bashed in.  
>The Nightbird arrived with a lot of noise and landed a bit away.<br>Nightwing came running, carrying a folded stretcher.  
>He fell out of step and almost stumbled when he saw Damian, face down in his own blood.<br>It was like the scene after Flamingo all over again.  
>"Oh god Batman… What happened?"<br>Nightwing handed the stretcher batman and knelt down next to Robin.  
>While getting the Stretcher unfolded, Batman started to explain.<br>"We followed one of Riddler's spies. And I guess that he found him and was ambushed. He inhaled a gas, it's dispersed now, but it keeps him in a state of sleep."  
>"So sleeping gas?" Nightwing replied testy.<br>"No. It caused hallucinations for the other victims."  
>Together they carefully placed Damian on the stretcher;<br>Dick brushed the short strands of hair out of Damian's face gently and rubbed the sleeping boy's cheek with his thumb.  
>"His eyes are moving under his lids… is he dreaming?"<br>Batman was already on his way to the Bird.  
>"We will find out when we get back, get him into the bird please."<br>Nightwing frowned and made to bring the boy in.

On the way back Dick sat next to Damian, holding his hand and brushing over his hair occasionally.  
>He was angry at Bruce for not caring. How could he stay so calm? Okay, stupid question, it was Batman live.<br>Never caring about anything but the job…  
>No. It wasn't as simple as that, but Bruce simply didn't care enough for Damian to really worry.<br>Damian's eyes kept moving under his lids, making Dick wonder what he dreamt about.  
>"What is it that you dream about little robin?"<p>

Light.  
>Light and warmth was the first thing Damian noticed.<br>He opened his eyes and realized that he was lying on a white warm ground, surrounded by white.  
>Moving slowly he got up and examined his head for any injuries, but even though he was sure that one of the thugs had hit him pretty hard, there was nothing.<br>No blood or pain at all.

"Okay, now where am I? Am I dead?"

"No, just caged in your dreams"

Damian spun around, startled by the young voice behind him.  
>Smiling, there stood a little boy about five years old. Blue eyes shined with happiness and life.<br>Black tousled hair fell into the boy's face.  
>"Who are you?" Damian asked.<br>The boy cocked his head aside  
>"I am your guide I guess."<br>"You guess?"  
>The guide nodded.<br>"This is inside your dream and I am something like your guide. A personality you created subconsciously to prevent you from getting lost in your own mind."  
>"So I am inside my own mind?"<br>"Exactly, only you are a conscious mind like me, you cannot change or control anything here inside your dream. And only when you find yourself again, you will be able to wake up.  
>God that sounds so confusing."<br>"You don't say... How is it possible that you are confused by the things you say yourself?"  
>The guide shrugged and smiled.<br>"Ask yourself, you created me."  
>Damian sighed annoyed.<br>"Okay and how am I supposed to find myself? There is nothing but white here!"  
>Frustrated Damian sat down cross-legged and huffed annoyed.<br>"Well, this is your dream. Let your mind wander and I think it'll take you there."  
>"Are you kind of a know it all?"<br>"You created me"  
>"Fuck you."<p>

Damian decided that it was no use to ask his guide any more questions, so he lay down and tried to let his mind wander a bit.  
>It was futile.<br>How could someone that was trained to stay alert all the time let his mind wander?  
>It was a sign of lack of defence and vulnerability.<br>He had been told ever since he was a child that he should never…

"DREAM!"

Damian jumped to his feet in surprise.  
>He wasn't in the white room anymore but in an old Asian building.<br>His bare feet felt the hard tatami beneath them and the training suit he wore was heavy on his shoulders.  
>He had shrunk as well.<p>

_What the?_

"Master, did you listen? Never dream during training!"

Damian looked up to the hooded man that had talked to him. It was a faceless person, but the voice seemed familiar.  
>The guide had disappeared.<br>Looking around the room he recognized the place. It was the old Dojo where he had been trained as a child.

And the man yelling at him was his old sensei, one of many.  
>Damian felt like yelling back, but he couldn't control his movements, instead he heard himself sobbing.<p>

"But I want to play with the tiger cups!"

_What the heck? Have I really just uttered the wish to play with baby tigers?_

He was thrown off his feat when the sensei's foot made contact with Damian's stomach.  
>Damian felt himself retch and tears ran down his cheeks, gasping for air he got on his knees when he was hit by a knee in the head.<br>Everything blurred and became dizzy for a moment and the disgusting taste of his own blood in his mouth made him want to throw up.  
>The teacher continued beating Damian.<p>

_Why the fuck can't I do anything?_

All Damian was able to do was crying and trying to block some of the attacks sloppily with his tiny arms.  
>For a moment he blacked out when he was thrown into the wall. The attacks stopped.<br>When he opened his eyes, everything was red, his teacher hovering over him, still faceless, the dojo, even the boy standing behind the teacher.

"Take the knife and end it." The boy said.

Damian realized that he had been thrown into a wall, on which several weapons had been stalled and the impact had knocked some of them down.  
>One of them was right next to him.<br>He took the knife and suddenly everything he had ever been taught floated into his mind.  
>He knew how to kill this man easily, but something made him hesitate.<p>

"It's okay; I will take the guilt upon myself." Added the boy.

Damian nodded and lunged towards the teacher quickly.  
>The knife ran deep into the old man's throat and a fountain of blood bathed the young Damian.<br>Now he could see other faceless people staring at him, bystanders that now applauded the young killer.  
>Damian fell to his knees again and watched his teacher die, when he was sure that the old man's heart had ceased to beat, he fainted.<p>

When he opened his eyes, he was in the white room again, still lying on his back.  
>The room had darkened a bit and was now more of a gray than white.<br>Something moved next to him and he saw the guide sitting there, his eyes visibly darkened.  
>"Are you okay?" Damian asked, surprised by the change.<br>The boy nodded, face indifferent.  
>"I just relived my first kill… why?"<br>"Because it is something your subconscious has never really come to terms with it."  
>"But I can kill without hesitation"<br>"That's because it all works in your subconscious, not your conscious state now."  
>Damian nodded slowly.<br>"So what do you think will be my next step? Wait… don't tell me, I know ask yourself, blablabla. "

He closed his eyes, and when he opened them again he found himself in the middle of a huge pile of presents and a lot of faceless people, staring at a beautiful woman walking towards him.

_Mother…_

The Woman opened her arms and held them outstretched in front of the eight year old Damian.

"Come here, son."

Damian stepped forward and embraced his mother.  
>It was definitely not what he had imagined their first meeting to be.<br>He had always dreamt how they would smile and laugh and how his mother would shower him with love instead of presents.  
>But this was a cold and very formal occasion.<br>Even the hug was all too short and only for show.  
>The maid behind him nudged him lightly, signalizing for him to say his lines.<p>

"I am honoured to meet you Mother" he bowed down "I will do anything to become an honourable son and heir to our family."

His mother smiled obviously content with her son and left to talk to someone else.

Damian turned to look at the maid.

"Salia, why didn't she stay?"

The maid smiled sadly

"Your mother is a very busy woman, I am sure she will talk to you some more later."

Damian nodded, but he was sure that he had experienced all of his mother's attention for one day already.

The scenery changed and he was now kneeling next to a corpse. It was his maid Salia.

"You know that she was interfering with your education, Damian. She almost destroyed everything we worked for. You had to kill her."

Damian nodded, mind blank as was his face.  
>Now, just like in the other dream he saw the boy.<p>

"I'll take your burden, don't worry" the boy said, smiling.

Damian nodded and got up following his mother out of the room.  
>As he passed one of the guards he held out the bloodied knife.<p>

"Clean up this mess, would you?"

He closed the door behind him, draining the room of all light, leaving it completely dark.

"Hmmm" Damian hummed as he woke up, in the white room again.  
>He looked around, seeing that the room had gotten a lot darker again.<br>Across the room he saw his guide, sitting with his knees pulled close to his chest, observing Damian calmly.  
>Like the room, the guide had changed as well; he was now covered in the occasional bloodstain and bruised.<br>"What happened to you?"  
>The guide shook his head but didn't respond.<br>"Tell me, what happens when this room turns black?"  
>"Then that means that you will have lost yourself eternally."<br>Damian got up quickly and walked over to the guide.  
>"What? Then I am going to die? Why? I cannot control what to dream but the room always ends up darker, and you more beat up!<br>What kind of guide are you anyway? You are no help at all!" he snapped throwing his hands in the air.  
>"Have you ever considered, that maybe you only see dark dreams because that's what is consuming your mind?"<br>For a moment Damian stared at his guide and thought about it. Maybe it was true.  
>He sat down again and thought about what was or had been good in his life…<p>

* * *

><p>Exhausted, Tim sat down on the bench outside of the medical bay inside the batcave, followed by Dick who had changed into more comfortable clothes.<br>Tim had assisted Alfred during the operation on Damian.  
>His skull was fractured and they had to work on his spine for a while.<br>Now all they could do was wait for him to awake.  
>Tim leaned against the cool wall and closed his eyes.<br>The bench shook lightly due to Dick's constant tapping of his feet.

"Dick, he's okay…"  
>A desperate sigh escaped Dick's throat.<br>"He hasn't woken up, has he?"  
>"No, but…"<br>"That means he's not okay, Tim. Okay means that he's back to bickering and fighting, back to annoying the shit out of you… back to…"  
>He wasn't able to finish his sentence, and buried his face in his hands instead.<br>Taken aback by Dick's reaction, Tim started rubbing his older brother's back trying to calm him down.  
>"It's not like he's never been injured before. Remember Pink Flamingo?"<br>Dick shook off Tim's hand and glared at him.  
>"As if I could ever forget that! It was my fault that he got his spine shattered; I failed to look after him! And now he's hurt again…"<br>"Dick it's not your fault."  
>"No. It's Bruce's fault, I know that."<br>Tim frowned.  
>In his eyes Bruce hadn't done anything wrong, Damian was responsible for himself.<br>"It was not his…"  
>"Of course it was his fault! He should take care of Damian he is his son for god's sake! And now he's not even here, taking care of him."<br>Dick closed his eyes and leaned back against the wall.  
>"He's trying to find a cure to that gas, so he is doing something."<br>Eyes still closed, Dick chuckled coldly.  
>"Why do you think he does that? For Damian? He just wants to be prepared in case the Riddler uses the gas again."<p>

Before Tim was able to a respond to that, the door next to them was opened slowly.  
>Alfred stepped out and closed the door behind him, Dick quickly got up and his look was all it took for Alfred to know how he felt.<br>"Calm down Master Dick. Master Damian is stable but still asleep."  
>"Asleep or in a coma?"<br>The butler fidgeted with his gloves.  
>"I'm afraid I can't tell, sir. It looks as if he's simply asleep but I doubt that he's going to wake up anytime soon. I am sorry, sir."<br>Dick shook his head and patted the butler's shoulder as he passed him to enter the room.  
>"It's not your fault. Thank you for patching him back together Alfred."<p>

Inside, Dick's heart ached as he saw Damian lying in the white hospital bed.  
>His skin was so pale and the IV and the breathing mask made him look so extremely vulnerable.<br>There was a stool next to the bed, Dick grabbed it and sat down next to Damian.  
>Alfred had been right, saying that he looked like he was asleep.<br>But it seemed to be a very unpleasant dream, judging from Damian's clenched eyes and furrowed eyebrows.  
>"Damian… I am so sorry." He put his hand over Damian's and was surprised to feel that the small fingers moved occasionally.<br>"Please wake up, Damian…" Dick heard his own voice shake, and his eyes began to sting.

* * *

><p><strong>PART 2:<strong>

* * *

><p>This time it was different, Damian thought.<br>It was not like the other times when he had been ripped out of his sleep like state and thrown into the dream sequence, this time it was as if he was slowly pulled down and fell through something very soft.  
>As he fell, he was completely aware of his surroundings.<br>All around him were pictures of people he had met and events that now played on his mind.  
>The first time Grayson made him laugh, though of course it was all on the inside,<br>the undercover job with the girl blunder,  
>the movie night with his… his family.<br>As he looked at all these pictures while falling, all of the feelings he had felt back then started to return.  
>He felt proud, when Grayson had noticed their perfect Team work,<br>he felt flattered when the little girl had wanted to play with him,  
>confused and a bit embarrassed when the others talked about obvious things that seemed completely absurd for him,<br>and he felt joy and calmness when they explained them to him patiently despite his arrogant bickering.  
>He felt his fears vanish just like at the time, when Grayson had put his hand on Damian's arm, soothing him after he got shot by Pink Flamingo.<p>

Among all of those pictures there were two kinds of pictures that stood out more than the others…  
>Pictures of his father and Grayson, those of Bruce showing love to his son were rare, but they existed,<br>while those of Grayson fooling around and having fun were quite prominent.  
>Pictures of his Mother were nonexistent.<br>Suddenly, he no longer fell slowly, but at an immense speed.

A hoarse cry emerged from Damian's throat and he tried to stop the falling, because when he looked down, he could now see a black and white floor coming towards him alarmingly fast.  
>Damian realized that there was nothing he could do about it so he closed his eyes and just let it happen, let himself fall.<p>

It was then, that a warm and soft pair of hands grabbed his and stopped the fall.  
>Quickly he opened his eyes and saw Stephanie Brown smiling down at him.<p>

"Hey kiddo, how's it hanging?"

Despite his normal arrogant behaviour he smiled at her, though it was a smug smile.

"To be honest, I never thought I'd be happy to see you, girl blunder."

Brown chuckled and let go of Damian, who fell down at high speed again, but only for a short moment before he was caught again.  
>This time though, two different hands held him.<br>He looked up to see Timothy Drake and Colin Wilkes holding his hands.

"Got you, you annoying little brat." Drake said smiling friendly.

"Gosh, I didn't want you to touch me, I'd rather fall and die" Damian hissed but somehow he couldn't get that stupid smile off his face.

They let him fall again and even though he knew that the ground came closer faster than ever, he had the feeling that someone was going to catch him again,  
>so he closed his eyes and waited for them.<br>And indeed, again two very different hands grabbed his, one thin and delicate, the other strong and safe.

"Master Damian, this is dangerous…" Alfred said smiling concerned.

Damian looked up and smiled at the butler, but as he faced the other person, his heart stopped for a short moment.

"Damian… my son."

Bruce smiled at him. His smile was barely visible, but the hand that held him promised safety and love, and it was all it took for Damian to feel a lump in his throat and tears in his eyes.  
>Even though only hesitantly, Bruce and Alfred let go and Damian fell down still facing the two, unable to move now, and all he could do was hope that someone would catch him before he would shatter on the ground.<br>For a tiny second, he feared that no one was there and he'd die, but then he felt himself being caught by two strong arms.

"Hey Dami…"

Damian looked up to see Dick Grayson's blue eyes, fixed on him and filled with both love and concern.

"Finally decided to come back, have we?" Grayson chuckled and set down Damian.

When he got up he saw the guide standing a bit away, looking at him smiling weakly.  
>He was still terribly beat up and looked miserable.<br>"Why aren't you well again?" Damian asked.  
>"Because I have suffered damage that can never be healed, Damian, that's why."<br>Damian frowned.  
>"I have created you, right? So why can't I heal you?"<br>Smiling, the guide stepped closer and stopped only steps in front of Damian.  
>"My sole purpose is to keep you sane through all of the insanity of your world. For example, when a person kills, some of its humanity is lost in the process.<br>You created me when you were younger to shield yourself from losing your mind, because you wouldn't have been able to bear the wounds alone.  
>But no matter how good your life is now, you cannot deny your past and you will always carry scars."<br>"But that's not fair… not that I care personally of course."  
>"No use lying to yourself, Damian. I know you care."<br>"tt"

For a moment Damian studied the boy facing him, noticing that they really looked alike, and wondered what he could do to lift some of the other's pain.  
>"How about I take some of those scars you talk about upon myself?"<br>The guide looked rather confused.  
>"Why would you do that?"<br>Damian sighed.  
>"Because I want to get out of here, and to do that I need to find myself, right? I guess that you are me, so I have to help you."<br>He took a step towards the guide and grabbed his hand.  
>"So, how does this work? Do I have to…? "<br>He was cut off when he felt a stinging pain in his head, then in his heart and finally in his legs forcing him down on his knees.  
>It was a kind of pain Damian had never felt before and he didn't now how to handle it.<br>He tried several breathing techniques and mental tricks, but nothing worked.  
>He felt tears rolling down his cheek and when he looked up he saw that the guide, who still held his hand, cried as well.<br>"LET GO!" Damian cried out, trying to pull his hand away, but no matter how hard he pulled, he couldn't break free.  
>Damian raised his left hand to hit the guide when a warm hand kept him back.<br>Grayson sat there; his eyes closed and simply held his hand.  
>"GRAYSON! Help me!" but he didn't move, and even though Grayson's hand was only covering Damian's without any force, Damian couldn't move again.<br>Slowly, Damian felt his consciousness slipping away, and somewhere in his mind he knew that he was going to die if it slipped away completely.  
>"Damian, just accept the pain… you have to." He heard the guide's voice in the distance.<br>Gritting his teeth, Damian closed his eyes and tried to concentrate on the pain, allowing it to settle in and becoming a part of him before he fainted.

* * *

><p>Dick still sat next to Damian; fast asleep, his hand still holding Damian's left.<p>

On the other site of Damian's bed stood Bruce and simply studied his son's face.  
>Without a sound, Alfred entered the room and put a hand on Bruce's broad shoulder.<br>"Master Bruce, you should eat. I have prepared something, sir."  
>Shaking his head, Bruce turned to look at the elderly Butler.<br>"Alfred, it was my fault. I should have protected him."  
>The butler sighed.<br>"Maybe you should have, sir. But we all know that it is impossible to protect a young man like Master Damian."  
>"Dick did a great job at that…<br>why can't Dick take him in?"  
>"Because first of all, Dick is living his own life and should not bear the consequences of yours.<br>And second, I know that you didn't mean what you just said, sir.  
>You love your son. You only want to protect yourself."<br>Bruce frowned  
>"What do you mean? I think I know better…"<br>"With all due respect, sir, I know that you keep telling yourself that you don't love the young master, simply to keep yourself from being hurt.  
>You don't know how to act around him and you don't want to try, because you're afraid of him being so much like you.<br>But not the young and lively Bruce Wayne, he resembles the dark knight."  
>It was as if Alfred had read Bruce's mind, like always and Bruce knew that there was no use objecting now.<br>"Master Bruce, he is not only a killer, but a child, your son.  
>And a child needs love, Master Dick is doing a great job at that, I agree,<br>but you are his father and the boy wishes nothing more than to be acknowledged by you, sir."  
>Bruce looked back to Damian lying in his bed, looking so vulnerable and fragile. He was smiling slightly and his face was relaxed.<br>"I will try Alfred…"  
>Satisfied with the result, the butler led Bruce out of the room, to get his Master to eat something, leaving the others to sleep again.<p>

* * *

><p>"Let go…"<p>

Dick ripped open his eyes and stared at Damian.  
>Despite being asleep still, he had talked and was now moving around, it was as if he tried to pull his hand away, eyes clenched in pain.<br>"Damian…"  
>The young boy whimpered and tears began to run down his cheeks.<br>"Grayson… let go…"  
>Like hell, thought Dick, and pressed Damian's hand gently.<br>"I'm not going to let go."  
>Damian kept moving, as if he fought something, but relaxed suddenly and more tears escaped from his closed eyes before they fluttered open slowly.<br>"Damian!" Dick got up quickly, heart racing.  
>Damian's eyes darted around the room hastily and his breathing sped up for a moment, until he calmed down, having analyzed the situation.<br>He was still crying, but unable to hold back the tears.  
>The pain and the shock were still there and it had felt too real for him to shake the feeling off easily,<br>but he was quickly ripped out of his thoughts, when Dick suddenly jumped at him and pulled him into his strong arms.  
>"God Dami! You scared the shit out of me!"<br>Damian felt the urge to yell at Grayson for using his nickname, but he simply buried his face in the broad shoulders and hesitantly returned the embrace, careful not to rip out the IV.  
>Dick pulled him even closer, until Damian yelped in pain.<br>"Grayson! My neck!"  
>He let go immediately and propped Damian up against the pillow, keeping a hand on the slender neck to steady him.<br>"What exactly happened, Grayson?"  
>Clearing his throat, he pulled the chair closer, so he could sit and gently caress Damian's head.<br>"You were ambushed and inhaled some kind of gas… Bruce has analyzed it but wasn't able to create an antidote yet."  
>Leaning into the gentle touch a bit, Damian closed his eyes.<br>Normally he wouldn't let Grayson or anyone get this close, but it felt so soothing…  
>"You really scared us, we weren't sure you'd ever wake up again… even Tim was worried."<br>Damian scoffed; eyes still closed  
>"Drake? I doubt he was worried."<br>"He was, you know that he loves you; he'd never admit it, just like you never would. But I was terrified… never do this again, please."  
>"You were terrified? What do you think I was? It was hell in there!"<br>Puzzled, Dick cocked his head aside.  
>"In where?"<br>Damian blinked; it would sound crazy to say in his mind, though that was the exact truth…  
>"It doesn't matter."<br>"Yes it does, where?" Dick smiled.  
>"Shut up."<br>Dick laughed and leaned back a bit.  
>"You were the one who started."<br>"Shut up!"  
>"And what if I don't?" he asked, raising his eyebrows challenging.<br>"I'll stab you."

Dick kept laughing and stroked Damian's hair, when the door was opened and Bruce walked in, followed by Alfred and Tim.  
>Tim and Alfred both looked very relieved, though Tim tried to hide it and acted cool.<br>Bruce walked over to the other side of the bed while the others stayed at the bed's end.  
>It was strange, but Damian somehow felt as if he was falling all over again…<br>He looked up at his father and could barely hold back a surprised gasp when Bruce took his hand and pressed it gently.  
>"How are you Damian?"<br>Hesitantly he answered  
>"fine… I guess, a little sore."<p>

His father smiled and looked at Dick, they exchanged a look and it was all it took for them to come to an agreement.  
>Dick knew that Bruce would try to bond with his son, accept him and give him as much love he could muster,<br>while Dick would always be there for Damian, taking care of him and teaching him the things a dark knight wasn't capable of.  
>"We will only run some tests on you, Damian, before you can get up.<br>But I think that can wait until you have eaten something." Bruce said and let go of Damian's hand to leave the room with Alfred and Tim.

For a moment, Dick and Damian sat there in silence, until Dick realized that he was still holding Damian's hand.  
>"So, I think Alfred is done preparing your meal, should I get it?"<br>Damian nodded, but felt a tiny bit of regret to have agreed, when Dick let go of his hand and got up.  
>Before Dick had reached the door though, Damian let out a sharp whistle, and Dick turned around.<br>"Grayson…"  
>"what is it Dami?"<br>"If I ever fell… would you…"  
>Dick chuckled and winked at him.<p>

"I'd always catch you, you know that."

Without a word, Damian nodded and smiled slightly before Dick left the room.

"Thank you… I'd catch you too." He said, knowing that no one was able to hear him.

* * *

><p>For the next days, Damian remained bed ridden.<br>The aftermath of the gas was a terrible migraine and his skull had yet to recover completely.  
>But it almost bored him to death to simply sit in bed all the time, doing nothing but playing games and watching movies.<br>They had moved him from the old room to his bedroom, so it was not like sitting in a hospital, but still it was boring.

Damian heard the door open cautiously and noticed Dick entering the room.

"Ever heard of knocking, Grayson?" his voice sounded bored and a bit annoyed, but deep inside he felt happy about the visit, and he couldn't help but smile at least a little bit.

Ignoring the comment, Dick crossed the room and sat down on the great bed, next to Damian.

"So, how are you feeling?" Dick asked.

The boy scooted almost unnoticeable closer to Dick. In a way he wished that Grayson would pat his head or massage his neck gently, but it was unbecoming for him so he refrained from uttering his thoughts.

"I am fine, just sleepy from time to time."

To demonstrate his state, he turned his head from side to side, but when he turned to the right, pain struck through his spine and he gasped in pain, clenching his eyes shut.  
>Sighing, Dick started to gently rub over Damian's hot neck, careful not to add too much pressure.<p>

"Doesn't really seem like fine to me."

Annoyed, and maybe a little embarrassed, Damian huffed and glared at Dick.

"Would you kindly tell me why you are here, Grayson?"

Dick chuckled and withdrew his hand from Damian's neck to fold them in his lap.

"Actually, I am here to inform you of my departure. I wanted to make sure you are okay before I leave."

Quickly Damian scooted away a bit.

"Where are you going?" He hadn't intended to sound as angry and surprised as he did, but he hadn't expected Grayson to leave again so soon.

"Look Damian" Dick said with a sad smile "I have to go back; my help is needed in a case. And you have Pennyworth and Bruce and even…"

"Don't you dare mentioning that dork Drake"

"And even Tim" Dick added, ignoring the remark.

Damian looked at Dick, searching his face for anything he could use to change his decision to leave.

In the end, though, it was no use. The decision was Dick's to make, and it didn't mean that he was gone forever, right?  
>Still, he didn't feel like breaking the silence, even though he knew that Grayson expected him to say something,<br>but it was not like a word of approval or disapproval would change anything, so why make any effort?

They remained silent until Dick got up.

"I have to go, Dami. If you want to stay silent about this, it's fine by me." Damian knew that was a lie; it was obvious that Dick was a bit hurt, though Damian couldn't tell why.

Dick was already at the door.

"Grayson…"

The tall man turned around and felt his heart skip a beat when he saw Damian, _the_ Damian, sitting there with his arms outstretched towards him, a slight blush on his cheeks.  
>For a moment he simply stood there, taken aback by the situation.<p>

"At least say goodbye properly, Grayson."

The room was crossed once again and even though it had been Damian that had offered the hug, it was Dick that pulled the boy close.  
>He felt Damian wrapping his arms around him hesitantly and couldn't help but smile. He tightened the hug a little bit, savouring the unusual gesture of affection from Damian, when once again Damian yelped in pain.<p>

"Grayson! My neck! Do you want to break it?"

Dick released Damian and gave him a worried look.  
>Damian rubbed his neck<p>

"I think you dislocated something you monkey."

Dick chuckled and ruffled Damian's hair gently.

"I know I didn't and that won't make me stay."

"It was worth a try." Damian said, smiling.

* * *

><p>After an hour, Dick had finally finished packing up.<br>He sat down on his suitcase and let out a tired sigh.  
>Damian was at the Doctor's - in public Damian Wayne fell down a climbing wall and hurt his head and neck - and Tim was out with Tam.<br>He was about to leave when he saw Alfred walking towards him.

"Alfred! I thought you accompanied Damian." Not that Dick minded seeing the butler once more before he left.

"No, sir. Master Bruce is accompanying his son." Dick gave him a surprised look and noticed the butler's smile.

"I was told to give you this, before your departure." Alfred held out a folded paper, and Dick took it.

He wanted to open it immediately, but Alfred held up his hand.

"I was told that no one, except you, is allowed to see it, and that you shouldn't unfold it until you are home, sir." Confused, Dick stared at the paper.

* * *

><p>After he had arrived at home and finally lay in his comfortable bed, the folded paper popped in his mind again. He had totally forgotten all about it.<br>He got up to search his bags and suitcase for it, and when he found it, he settled on his couch to look at it.  
>When he unfolded it, he couldn't hold back a little chuckle. It was a letter.<p>

'Dear Grayson,  
>I just want you to know that you will have to bear the consequences for your absence, and I hope you are aware of the fact that I will punish you for all the boredom that I will be going through.'<p>

(The next sentence was scribbled over and he couldn't read it, but somehow he was sure that it was something that the writer had felt embarrassed about.)

'Now, I hope that you have arrived unharmed and that you will read this.  
>It's not like I need you here but I think Pennyworth and father will get lonely when you are not here, and that both of them will miss you dearly.<br>So please come back soon or at least call every now and then, so I don't have to deal with their moods.

Sincerely

Damian Wayne.

P.S.  
>Since father told me to, and only because he told me to, I drew you a bird. I like blue better than red, so it's blue.'<p>

Dick felt his heart warm when he looked at the letter and the drawing.  
>It was not only one bird, but two sitting side by side on a branch. One was red, green, black and yellow, while the other one, a lot taller, was black and blue.<br>They were quite remarkably drawn to be honest. Damian obviously had some artistic talent, Dick thought.  
>And as he looked around his living room, he felt somehow alone.<br>He wished to have a bickering and annoying and unbearably adorable little wild fang here to fight or talk, or simply laugh with.  
>It was then that it dawned upon him that he really missed Damian.<br>And obviously, Damian would miss him too.  
>Even if he wrote the letter in a distant way, his feelings shone through.<br>He sat there and read the letter over and over again, feeling that he would give a lot to trade places with Bruce now…

* * *

><p>The next day, Damian once again sat in his bed reading… bored to death.<br>It was almost unbearably boring.  
>Well, it had been bearable until Dick had to leave for New York again…<br>Damian sighed and tried to concentrate on the page he was reading again, to no avail, when he heard a knock from the door.

"Come…"  
>"Damian!"<br>Stephanie Brown stormed into the room, carrying Tupperware, followed by Colin Wilkes.  
>"…in" Damian finished.<br>Hastily, Stephanie gathered two chairs and set them down next to Damian's bed. He sat up cross legged and looked at them suspiciously.  
>"Hi Damian" Colin said sheepishly sitting down.<br>He greeted Colin friendly and observed Stephanie rushing around the room, obviously searching for something, still carrying her stupid boxes.  
>"Brown!" he yelled.<br>"Yes?" she stopped still, for a moment.  
>"Sit down, will you?"<br>"But I can't find any cutlery…"  
>Damian sighed and rubbed his eyes.<br>"What would you need cutlery for?"  
>Smiling widely, she opened the box and the delicious smell of warm bakery filled the room.<br>"Waffles!"  
>Just as Damian was about to tell her that he'd never eat her Waffles, he saw Colin, practically drooling next to him.<br>"…waffles" the redhead repeated, eyes widened.  
>"See? Your little friend likes Waffles."<br>"TT"  
>Colin blushed and started fidgeting with his fingers.<br>"I…If Damian won't take them…"  
>"Fine, we can eat them… just sit down."<br>Stephanie chuckled and sat down "We can eat them with our hands, right?"  
>The others agreed and they started digging in, Damian hesitantly and Colin vigorously.<br>After a while and about two incidents with Colin almost choking later, Stephanie set aside the emptied box.  
>"So, I didn't know you had a friend your age Damian. We met in front of the house."<br>"We met on a mission, he's abuse."  
>Stephanie whistled impressed.<br>"I… It's not that big of a deal" Colin stuttered, blushing slightly "Really."  
>"No it's really cool" Damian said, earning confused looks from the others<br>"He saved my life back then."

The redhead and the blonde exchanged a puzzled look.  
>"Damian, are you all right? You act so strange" Stephanie asked, sincerely concerned.<br>"That hit to your head must have been really bad" Added Colin.  
>Damian leaned back against the pillow.<br>"Hmm, I don't know. Maybe it's the pills. Sometimes they make things seem so blurry and not real." He smiled smugly.  
>"But Brown still looks fat, so I guess I am okay."<br>Angry, Stephanie stood up and smacked his leg, while Damian laughed and Colin smiled happily.  
>But they were right, the pills made his head dizzy and he felt really sleepy all of a sudden, before he could tell them though, his eyes fell shut.<p>

The others both smiled at the sleeping Damian and slowly retreated from the room.  
>Bruce hadn't told Damian, but all of the others knew that the poison he'd inhaled was normally deadly and that he had slipped in and out of death several times that night.<br>To the relief of everyone, though, the little devil was still alive and on his way to get better.


	2. Second dream

**A/N: Okay chapter 2 :D  
><strong>

**I updated chapter1, there's a new part now, so go and read it if you'd like :)  
><strong>

I hope i did Tim justice, because i don't really like him, but i did want to protray him the way he is, soooo hope he's not too bad.

Disclaimer: oh and of course, i don't own anything :S

Song of my choice for this: Built for sin - Framing hanley

* * *

><p>"Stupid brat"<p>

Tim muttered under his breath, cursing Damian for being the reason he had to stay home tonight.  
>Damian still hadn't completely recovered and from time to time he had some kind of sleeping fit.<br>He just fell asleep, sometimes he'd wake up after ten minutes, and sometimes he didn't wake up for hours.  
>No one really knew what happened during his sleep, since he didn't want to talk, but he always looked scared and exhausted afterwards.<br>No one had informed Dick about it yet…  
>They didn't want to worry him more than necessary, while Bruce was tracking down the Riddler like a madman, trying to get his hands on an antidote.<br>And of course, Damian couldn't patrol when there was the risk of him falling asleep any minute, so Tim was forced to look after Damian whenever Bruce went out for patrol.  
>Strangely enough, Damian had protested only when Bruce told Alfred to look after him.<br>He didn't seem to mind Tim as his guardian; he had just shrugged it off and went into his room.

Now, Tim sat inside the kitchen, eating a bowl of popcorn alone, and listened to the sounds of the TV that was on in the living room.  
>Damian was probably watching another Hannibal movie, with his dog Titus.<br>Bored and annoyed, Tim had to fight the urge to just leave and do something he'd enjoy instead of babysitting, when he heard a pained muffled cry from the living room.  
>He got up immediately and saw Titus standing next to the couch, licking a hand that hanged over the armrest concerned.<br>When the dog noticed Tim, he faced him and snarled at him.  
>Whimpers were heard from the couch and he was sure that Damian had a nightmare, nothing unusual for him since the attack,<br>and Tim was about to leave again, when sobs emitted from the couch.  
>No matter how much both of them disliked each other, when he heard Damian crying like the child he was supposed to be,<br>his heart felt heavy and he quickly walked over just to be stopped by the Great Dane.

"Calm down boy, I won't hurt him." The dog must have understood because he let Tim pass, still eying him suspiciously.

Tim walked around the couch and bent over Damian, seeing tears slowly running down his face.

"Damn, what would Dick do?" he asked himself, wondering how to comfort the boy, without getting hit or making the situation awkward.

He decided to gently touch Damian's shoulders and shake him slightly.  
>Wrong decision…<br>Damian's eyes flew open and before Tim could even say anything, Damian jumped up and tackled Tim.  
>He fell on his back with Damian on top, his knees pressing Tim's arms to his side.<p>

"What the fu…"

Before his sentence was finished Damian started to strangle Tim.  
>His eyes were wicked and full of panic. That was not the normal Damian, Tim thought trying to break free.<br>Damian was incredibly strong and held him in place firmly, causing Tim to feel his vision fading slowly.  
>Before he fainted though, he kicked up with all his might and hit Damian's head hard.<br>Damian fell to the side as Tim grabbed his collar and pinned him down, holding Damian's hands over his head.

"What was that about?" he yelled at the boy beneath him.

He looked into Damian's eyes and was stunned by the fear in them.  
>Damian started shaking and all colour in his face faded, his eyes darting around unfocused.<p>

"Please don't kill me" he whispered.

Loosening his grip, Tim backed away a bit.

"Damian, what is wrong? I wouldn't ever kill you." Though imagining it is fine, I guess, he thought.

A whimper was heard, and Titus stepped forward to lick Damian's hands that were still pinned down by Tim.  
>Damian flinched at the touch, but suddenly he relaxed and his eyes became focused again.<br>He looked at Tim, still agitated.

"Let me go, Drake."

Shaking his head, Tim put more pressure on Damian's wrists.

"Not before I am sure that you're back to normal."

Damian sighed.

"Look just let me go, okay? I feel sick, and you practically kneeling on my stomach isn't really helping."

"But you'll tell me what this was about, are we clear?"

No answer.

"Are we clear?"

"Drake, I am going to throw up all over you if you don't let me go right now" Damian said, voice unusually cold and composed.

Tim huffed and let go, allowing Damian to roll away and get to his feet.  
>But his legs weren't stable, and he would have fallen over, if Tim hadn't caught him.<p>

"You can barely stand…" Tim noted.

Despite Damian's weak protest, he lifted him up and carried him upstairs into his room.  
>When he placed Damian on top of his bed, he studied the young boy. He was pale and seriously exhausted despite having slept all the time.<br>Tim grabbed a chair from Damian's desk and set it down next to his bed, taking a seat.

"So, now tell me what that was about, and don't tell me it was nothing."

Damian sighed, his eyes closed and one hand over his stomach.

"Still feeling sick?"

A nod was all the response he got.

"Okay, I'll get you some water and something against the nausea.  
>But then you'd better tell me, if not, then I'll tell Bruce about it. And I think we both know how he'd react to this without a good explanation."<p>

Opening his eyes a bit, Damian glared at Tim and nodded again.

* * *

><p>When Tim got back, Damian was sitting on his bed, hugging his knees and leaning against the wall, watching as Tim entered the room.<br>He handed Damian the glass of water and a pill.

"Now, where were we?" he asked sarcastically as Damian downed both the water and the pill.  
>"Ah, right! You were about to tell me why you wanted to kill me."<p>

Another glare was shot at Tim, before Damian cleared his throat and rested his head on his knees.

"I thought you wanted to kill me…"

"I just shook you to wake you up! You were crying in your sleep."

Tim noticed how Damian was now clawing his knees.

"I know… In my Dream…" Damian said through gritted teeth.

"God damn it Damian! Just tell me already!" Tim said, sighing loudly, his patience slipping.

"You have to swear not to tell this anyone, got it? No one will ever know about this!"

Now Tim's curiosity was piqued and he nodded.

Damian took a deep, shaky breath.

"When I was younger, about six, it was normal to test me. Assassins would attack me randomly and I'd have to fight them off.  
>It was okay, because I always had a weapon with me at that time and the heir to Ra's Al Ghul was supposed to defend himself no matter the situation.<br>But one day they went too far.  
>My chamber had always been a safe place and no one was allowed to enter it, especially not at night, but one night, three of our Assassins abandoned that rule and broke in during the night.<br>I… I would have protected myself, but both my arms were broken and they wouldn't be treated until the next day…"

"Woah, wait!" Tim cut him off "Both your arms were broken and not treated?"

Damian nodded

"My Sensei broke them during practice and he said it would be a good lesson to feel the pain for the night… to remind me not to let it happen again."

For a moment Tim sat there and gave Damian's life a real thought for the first time.  
>He wanted to say something, but didn't know how to tell Damian about how he felt about it, because for Damian this had been the norm, the only reality he knew…<p>

"Anyway…" Damian continued

"I couldn't defend myself and I knew the rules. In the event that I couldn't defend myself, I was to be wounded.  
>And even though they had overstepped their bounds, they started cutting me.<br>It was obvious that they were intoxicated…  
>I tried to fight them off but… if my maid hadn't called the guards, I don't think I'd be alive still.<br>And before, I was dreaming.  
>And in my dreams I lived through that again, and couldn't tell dream from reality when you tried to wake me, I thought you were one of the attackers."<p>

Damian paused for a moment

"I feared as much, that's why I didn't want Pennyworth to look after me. I… I am sorry."

Tim shrugged.

"I don't know what to say, to be honest."

Frowning, Damian raised his head.

"I apologized, didn't I?"

Tim shook his head.

"Not because of that, apology accepted. But I meant because of what happened… I didn't know…"

He met Damian's eyes, widened in surprise.

"Do you feel sorry for me? Why?"

"Why? Just think about what you just told me."

Damian sighed and straightened his legs.

"I know for you this all must seem extremely cruel or whatever, but I don't need your pity." His voice was back to his arrogant cocky self…

Tim frowned and got up

"It's not pity, it's just… oh forget it!" with that he stomped out of the room.

This stupid brat always had to act tough and let no one close to him, thinking that he is above all of them!  
>Inwardly he fumed and cursed as he walked down the stairs slowly, when he ran into Titus.<br>The Great Dane looked up at Tim for a moment before running up the stairs into Damian's room.

Annoyed, Tim huffed and walked back into the kitchen, determined on finishing his bowl of popcorn.  
>After he finished, he went into the living room, just to run into Titus again.<p>

"Are you stalking me?" he asked, chuckling when he noticed that there was a piece of paper attached to the leathered collar.

"All right, either I take it and risk getting my hand bitten off, or I leave it there and avoid any damage."

"He won't bite you, you idiot!" the voice came from next door and quick steps running up the stairs could be heard, before a door was slammed.

As he undid the paper Tim couldn't help but chuckle.  
>It was a drawing.<br>A red bird sat on a wire, a bat on his left and a black and blue bird on his right.  
>It was beautifully done, but what surprised Tim most was the neat writing underneath the drawing.<p>

'Thank you'

Tim couldn't help but smile.

"You are one stubborn brat, Damian."


	3. Third dream

Sooo, chapter 3 is done :) hope you'll like it^^

Song of my choice: invincible - Hedley

* * *

><p>Once again, Damian found himself in his own mind, experiencing a dream…<br>He wished his father would finally find an antidote and free him from this exhausting chain of memories.  
>Almost always he dreamt about things that had happened to him in the past, and after waking up, he always felt drained of energy and sick.<br>But sometimes he'd dream complete nonsense or strange events that he somehow responded to strongly on an emotional base.  
>In all those dreams, all he could do was watch and observe.<br>Up until now, he never really had a problem with what he dreamt, until he dreamt THIS!

"Damian, are you still awake?"

Damian opened his eyes and turned his head to see Stephanie Brown sitting next to him.  
>She looked a bit older, more like a woman… well, not in a bad way, and looked at him amused.<p>

"Sixteen and falls asleep during a movie?" she chuckled and Damian studied her wonderful eyes.

_They are not wonderful!_

"This movie is boring, why do you even want to watch it?"

"Hey! Little miss sunshine is great!" she gently punched his arm and scooted closer as she reached for the bowl of popcorn on his lap, making Damian nervous.

_Why the hell would I be nervous?_

"We are watching a movie… on a Friday evening?" Damian asked, sounding as cynical as he could.

"Aw you kill the mood! Let's go outside then! Enjoy the sun!" she said cheerfully.

"The sun has already set."

She punched him playfully again and got up.

"Then let's enjoy the moon, you moaner!"

Damian sighed and got up as well shutting off the TV and player.

"I heard there's a fair near the docks." He mentioned casually, not letting through that he'd always wanted to visit one with her.

_That's not true!_

For a moment, Stephanie considered it but shook her head.

"Or we could do something else."

She walked over to Damian and slid her hands around his neck, scratching her nails over his skin slightly.  
>He felt goose bumps and shivered under her touch.<p>

_Dear god, please don't!_

Damian wrapped his arms around her slender waist and pulled her closer.

"What would you propose?"

Stephanie leaned up and whispered against his ear, sending sparks through his body.

"How about we have some fun?"

_Let me wake up!_

Damian chuckled, his voice low and hoarse.

"Like this?" he leaned down to kiss her passionately.

_EEEW! Stop it! I demand you to stop!_

"You demand who to stop what, Damian?"

Damian opened his eyes and saw both Stephanie Brown and Colin Wilkes looking at him confused.  
>Thank god, the dream is over, he thought sighing.<p>

"Nothing, just a dream."

"Damian, you know you can talk to us…" Stephanie said.

"Brown, I'd feel safer if you kept your concentration on the task at hand." Damian said rubbing the bridge of his nose, trying to get rid of the headache.

"I am Damian, just so you…"

"DOG!" Colin screamed from the pillion seat.

Stephanie ripped the steering wheel around to avoid hitting the dog. Luckily the other lane was empty.

"What did I tell you Brown?" Damian yelled.

"I was paying attention!" she yelled back.

"Please…" whimpered Colin, visibly shocked by the manoeuvre.

Damian leaned back and looked out of the window. Thank god that was only a dream…. as if I'd ever kiss a girl like Brown, thought Damian.

"Colin, are you all right?" guilt dripped from Stephanie's voice and she patted the shocked boy's shoulder carefully.

Damian couldn't help but smile.

* * *

><p>"We're here boys!" Steph got out of the car and waited for the boys to follow, until locking the doors.<p>

"And where is here?" Damian asked, shielding his eyes from the sun to see something.

"THE 'Luna Park'!" Colin burst out excited.

Patting his shoulders, Steph smiled down at him

"Recovered from the shock?" Colin nodded and beamed at her first and then at Damian before running ahead.

"Come on let's go Damian!"

Looking at Steph sceptically, he waited for an explanation.  
>Shrugging and raising her hands in defence, Steph smiled<p>

"Come on. Dick said you never been to an amusement Park, well not during the day at least, so here we are."

"Damian! Look here! They even have a little zoo!" Colin called from afar, waving at them.

Damian slapped his forehead and sighed.

"If not for you, do it for Colin. You know that Colin doesn't have the privileges to do this often, maybe not at all."

"Okay, I'll go."

Steph smiled and grabbed his hand pulling him along, ignoring Damian's protests which he gave up after receiving too many strange looks.

"What do you wanna do first, Damian? I wanna go to the big rollercoaster! Oh! Oh! Or the zoo, or the haunted house! Let's see the haunted house!"

It was almost impossible to stop the little red head. He had been talking nonstop ever since they entered the park, testing Damian's patience.  
>This place was creeping him out, like seriously!<br>There were several persons running around in costumes, big enough to hide deadly weapons en masse, tons of loud children and overly cheesy couples, crowding the whole park.  
>Damian tried to keep his eyes everywhere, his senses spiked to max, but Colin's constant stream of words distracted him and soon he felt his head throb.<br>Eventually even Steph noticed Damian's stressed out condition and asked Colin to get them some cotton candy and soda, just to guide Damian over to a bench.

"Are you okay, D? You look a little bit stressed out."

Damian laughed sarcastically.

"This is stupid! I can't even hear my own thoughts and we would all be easy targets in a crowd like this. Why do children consider a place like this fun?"

The blonde put an arm around Damian's shoulders and leaned against him playfully, reminding Damian of his dream involuntarily.

"Let go Brown" he hissed, but Stephanie just ignored it.

"That's because not every kid is as obsessed with danger like you, D. Some kids like to play. And I promise you, there's no danger or crime here, just relax for once."

She looked down into his eyes, and for a moment Damian saw the older Stephanie, the one he…  
>He looked away quickly to hide his blush and huffed.<p>

"Fine. I'll try."

Smiling even wider, Stephanie gave him a hug and withdrew her arm to Damian's disappointment.

Wait, no, he didn't even want a hug from her!, he thought making a face.

After a while and an awkward silence later, Colin came back, carrying a plastic bag and three cotton candies.  
>Thanking Colin, Steph took two and passed one on to Damian before starting to eat it. Disgusted, Damian held it away from his face.<p>

"What is this?"

Chuckling, Colin sat down next to Damian.

"Cotton Candy, it's great!"

Not quite believing it, Damian still eyed it suspiciously.

Sighing, Colin ripped off a bit from his one and held it in front of Damian's lips.

"Eat it."

"I can eat on my own, Wilkes."

"Just eat it for christ's sake!"

Damian obeyed and took the offered bite, surprised when the wool-like candy warmed up in his mouth and melted, extremely sweet on his tongue.  
>It really was kind of tasty.<br>Without a word, he started eating his own and ignored the triumphant grins the others shared behind his back.

"Now boys, what do you think we should do first?"

Colin took a sip from his can of cola. "How about the roller coaster? Or the shooting galleries?"

"I don't really care" Damian said casually.

They all discussed it for a moment and in the end came to the conclusion to first ride the roller coasters and save the haunted house until the end.

* * *

><p>Damian would have never admitted that the trip was actually a lot of fun, and that he enjoyed spending the afternoon with his… friends, but that was the truth.<br>They had ridden practically every roller coaster possible, well Steph and Damian did, since Colin almost threw up after the fifth, and were now heading towards the great haunted house.  
>From the outside, it appeared to be a normal small sized mansion, but screams and laughter could be heard from inside, though Damian wasn't sure which were real and what was recorded.<br>Colin looked as excited as always and walked ahead a bit.  
>Fortunately there was no crowd, so they didn't have to wait for hours to get in.<br>One of the employees stopped them though, holding a little girl on his right.

"Hey you guys" he called "Could one of you accompany this little girl? Her brothers went in without her and she's scared to go alone, and only pairs are allowed."

The three exchanged questioning looks, until Steph smiled.

"Of course I'll accompany you little princess!" she went over to the girl and was happy to see her smile.

"You two, be nice." She said towards the boys and winked at them.

Damian huffed, annoyed while Colin waved after them.

"This is going to be great Damian!"

Damian couldn't help to smile, seeing his friend this excited over something childish like this.  
>After five minutes of waiting, they were allowed to enter.<p>

* * *

><p>The entrance was a simple dark room. No lights and completely soundproof. Damian was used to this and didn't hesitate to keep walking.<br>Suddenly, he felt Colin clinging to his arm and tee, hands shaking.

"Wilkes, are you really afraid?" he asked amused.

There was no answer.

"Colin…?"

Colin whimpered.

"Th….the crow… please don't hurt me…"

Damian turned around, his eyes already adjusted to the dark and put his hands over Colin's eyes.

"There, better?"

Colin was trembling under his touch, and Damian started to grow concerned.  
>When Damian got behind Colin, the redhead gasped and almost screamed, but when he felt the warm hand on his shoulder and one covering his eyes he kept it back.<br>Gently, Damian pushed Colin forward.

"Look, when you cover your eyes it is just as dark. No difference, right?"

Colin nodded slightly.

"Just keep walking, I am here and the scarecrow won't hurt you. Just pretend that I am guiding you towards a secret party or something like that, covering your eyes so you can't see anything."

They kept walking slowly, and when they reached a black heavy curtain, marking the exit, Damian lifted his hands and opened it, revealing a room that looked like a torture chamber.

"God, Damian, I am so sorry…" Colin sighed and braced himself on the wall.

"I normally never have problems in the dark…" well that wasn't entirely true, but Damian didn't need to know about it.

Shrugging, Damian kept walking, eying the fake weapons and torture instruments.

"It's no problem, complete lack of sound and light, tends to scare people."

Colin caught up and walked beside Damian.

"Experience?"

Damian stopped, looking at an old stretch bank.

"Kind of…"

Even though he hadn't intended to think about it, the 'experience' he had, popped up in his mind against his will.

Three and a half days… no light… no sound… no water… no food, a training to test his mind and body, experiencing a state near to death and complete submission to his mind.  
>He had been locked into a cell when he had been seven years old to be prepared for a later Thögal...<p>

"Damian?"

Melting out of his frozen state, Damian blinked and continued walking.  
>He shouldn't be thinking about it, but have fun with his friend now.<p>

Colin didn't know about the time he had lived with his mother, all he knew was that he was raised an assassin,  
>but even though Damian was proud of his origins, he didn't want Colin to know about the things he had done or experienced.<br>Seeing Colin disgusted by him or the pitiful look on the redhead's face would kill Damian, so he decided to keep all his scars from Colin, acting like an almost normal child.

The next room was a boring railway they had to follow, while countless rubber spiders and plastic zombies attacked them.  
>But when they entered the next room, Damian felt his instincts kick in.<br>He heard a strange mechanic sound and quickly grabbed Colin and jumped aside, barely dodging the spotlight that would have crashed them otherwise.  
>One of the iron-rods had ripped open Damian's shirt and revealed part of his back and side.<br>He got up quickly, ignoring the blood that ran down his back, watching Colin rubbing his head and getting up slowly.  
>Damn, he had to get away from Colin, or otherwise he'd see Damian's back… covered in old scars.<br>And Colin would know that they weren't from crime fighting or sparring.  
>He'd see that they were scars from countless surgeries and trainings that involved brutal hardening.<br>He'd look at him, disgusted by his scarred body…

"Wow, Damian, what just happened?"

Damian tried to position himself, so that Colin couldn't see the ripped parts, but it was pointless.  
>He cursed in Arabic, it seemed like the logical choice, but after living with Grayson for a while he knew that what he was about to do, could cost him a friend.<p>

"I'm sorry Colin" he said quickly and ran away.

Colin looked after him, confused and a little bit dizzy.

"What the heck just happened?" he asked, no one in particular.

* * *

><p>Stephanie was standing outside, trying to calm down the little girl while scolding her older brothers, when suddenly Damian rushed out of the Mansion.<br>All she saw was blood and no Colin, so she abandoned the others and ran after him, catching him after about a ten second chase.  
>She grabbed his hand and pulled him to a stop, turning him around in the process, when she saw his face, it felt like a punch in the face.<br>He looked devastated.

"Let…"

Damian couldn't say anything more, before Stephanie pulled him into her arms, holding him close to her chest.

"… go" he whispered.

They stood there awkwardly, since Damian didn't muster the courage to hug her back, until she released him.

"What happened Damian?"

Sighing, Damian pointed at a bench that stood near by and they walked over.  
>Stephanie never let him go completely, held his hand or rubbed his back, where the shirt wasn't torn apart.<p>

In her concern and worry, she hadn't noticed his scars at all, and Damian would do anything to keep it that way.

"Tell me, what happened?"

"There, was a spotlight that came down…"

Stephanie looked at him expectantly, waiting for more, but nothing came.

"Is Colin okay?"

Damian nodded, and he felt sick, thinking of how he had just lost his only friend…  
>He didn't even realize that he was crying until Stephanie wiped his tears away, taking him into her arms again and he leaned his head against her shoulder.<p>

"Please Damian, I can't help you if you won't talk…"

Stephanie was at a loss…  
>Damian Wayne, annoying little bitch number one was now crying in her arms, though he wasn't a sobbing pile of pity, just silently crying. Like a real man, she thought.<br>It took a while until he started talking.

"I ran away…"

"Is he hurt?"

Damian's no, wasn't more than a whisper.

"Then why did you run?"

"I… he… I didn't want him to see them."

Confused, Steph shook her head slightly.

"Them?"

Damian nodded, and she knew he was trying to regain his composure.  
>But when he finally answered, it came out with a sob.<p>

"My scars!"

Her heart stopped for a moment and finally she paid attention to his still bleeding back.  
>That's when she saw them…<br>white lines, some thick, some thin, on tanned skin.  
>A pattern serving as proof for a horrible and short childhood…<p>

"Don't look!" he cried.

Steph had to fight the urge to ask him about them, but she knew that wasn't what he needed right now.

"God damn it…" Damian cursed "Why am I crying?" he sobbed again, unable to stop the tears.

She pulled him closer and caressed the naked skin gently.

"Don't" Damian hissed.

"Damian, you don't have to hide them… they are a part of you."

Damien tried to pull away a bit, but Steph kept him in place.

"Were you afraid that Colin would think less of you if he saw them?"

Even without Damian answering, she knew the answer.

"Look, it's like a painting…" she said, trying to calm him down "I like them, they make you unique." She said gently while tracing some of the scars with her finger.

She felt Damian holding his breath, until he started breathing normally again.  
>She let go of him and he pulled back, looking at her with reddened eyes.<p>

"I know they are ugly, but how come you react so different from Grayson?" he asked.

"How did Dick react?"

Damian shrugged.

"He got all furious and looked as if he'd kill someone."

I think I know whom he'd liked to kill, Stephanie thought, I feel exactly the same…

"Please don't tell Colin about them…"

"But Damian, I am sure that he won't dislike you or anything…"

"Maybe, but if anyone is going to tell him… then it has to be me."

Stephanie nodded and tried to smile sympathetically.

"Do you want to tell him right now? I mean you did leave him standing there all alone, I am sure he'd like to have an explanation at least."

Nodding, Damian attempted to get up, but fell back on the bench.

Suddenly, his eyes felt extremely heavy…  
>God please, not a fit here, he thought.<p>

"Damian?"  
>Stephanie looked at him concerned, steadying him, when he fell into against her chest, his head on her shoulder.<br>Not really sure what to do, Steph pulled him closer, so that he rested against her more comfortably.

"Geez, how can you fall asleep in a situation like this?"

She slowly stroked his hair and watched him sleeping peacefully.  
>When he was asleep like this, he looked so innocent and vulnerable, she thought, and it woke the need to protect him.<p>

"Hey!"

As Steph looked up, she saw Colin walking towards them, rubbing his head.

"Colin, are you all right?"

He nodded, but gave her a confused look and pointed at the sleeping Damian.

"Is he okay? He just ran off…"

"I know… and yes, he's okay, for now."

Colin let out a relieved sigh, but his eyes were sad.

"Do you know why he ran off? I… I thought maybe he'd gotten annoyed by me, or something… and didn't want to play with me anymore.  
>I mean I'd understand him, me being… well me… i…"<p>

God, she thought, in a way the two boys were so alike…"

"Colin" she cut him off "You did nothing wrong, and believe me, it's not like he got fed up with you or anything. Rather the opposite…"

The redhead gave her a puzzled look.

"He was afraid of losing you, because of… well stuff… and you know he's socially awkward, right?"

"Yeah, but I am worried about him sometimes…"

Steph smiled and rubbed Damian's arm.

"I know, I worry too."

"Do you think he's ever going to tell me why he had to run off?"

She nodded and got up, trying to get Damian on her back.

"Could you please help me, Colin?"

Colin laughed and helped her carrying Damian out of the Park.

When Colin lifted Damian inside the car, he noticed his ripped shirt.

"Miss Brown… his back…"

His eyes were scanning the countless scars on Damian's back.

"How did he get these?"

Stephanie pulled him away gently and put on the security belt for Damian.

"I am sure he's going to tell you someday."

"Is this why…?"

Smiling sadly, she nodded as she closed the door.

* * *

><p>Back at Wayne manor, Alfred helped carrying Damian inside.<p>

"Miss Brown, if you'd like you can stay for dinner."

She laughed as they propped Damian up against the pillows on the couch.

"Oh, I couldn't do that Alfred, thank you though, but my mum is waiting for me."

"Did he behave, Miss Brown?"

Steph nodded and watched Damian shift in his sleep a bit, leaning back against the couch.

"I'll just say goodbye, Alfred, then I'll leave."

The old butler smiled and turned to leave the room, when Stephanie sat down next to Damian.

"Hey little D, I have to go."

She gently rubbed his arm, and wanted to stroke his hair, when he suddenly began to move.  
>He leaned over to her and wrapped his arms around her waist, still fast asleep.<br>At first Steph was pretty startled by the sudden hug, but when he gently rested his head on her shoulder, she wrapped her arms around him, rubbing circles on his back.  
>he muttered something in his sleep, but she couldn't make out what exactly.<p>

"What is it Damian?"

She almost died from the cuteness, when Damien nuzzled closer and mumbled something again.

"You know, you can't hold me like this forever. I have to go home, Damian" she said chuckling, and for a moment more, they remained like this.

Eventually, he let go and fall back against the cushions.  
>Steph combed through Damian's black, smooth hair once more before leaving.<p>

When Damian heard the door closing, he opened one of his eyes, to make sure he was alone.  
>It was easy to keep your breathing and heartbeat calm and steady, when you were trained as an assassin, he thought smiling.<br>And even though he only reluctantly wanted to admit it, even to himself, he had felt really happy, being held by Stephanie.  
>And even to himself, he denied the fact that his heart sped up whenever she smiled at him, and it made him furious in a strange way, that she was able to make him loose his cool so easily.<br>When he thought about it like this, his friends were perfect for him.  
>On one side, Stephanie who was able to make him loose his composure in an instant, and on the other side Colin, who always seemed to draw out his calm, kind nature.<br>While he thought about it all some more, he felt a wave of sleep wash over him, pulling him into deep sleep once more,  
>and when Alfred returned, blanket in hand, he smiled as he saw Damian sleeping peacefully.<br>Whatever the young boy dreamt, it must have been something very happy and calming.


	4. Fourth dream

Hello :) chapter 4 or rather 3.1 is out :) it's more of a continuation of the third chapter, well anyway, read and enjoy :)

Song of my choice: invincible - Hedley

* * *

><p>Colin Wilkes sat outside the orphanage and read an old, worn out book, enjoying the sun, when he noticed a pair of black sneakers in the corner from his eye.<br>He looked up and met Damian Wayne's clear blue eyes.

"Hey Damian, how are you?"

Without a word, Damian sat down next to Colin and stared ahead.

"Damian…?"

"I'm sorry…" Damian said eventually.

Knowing what Damian was talking about, he smiled and closed the book.

"Look, it's o…"

"No, it's not okay!" the blue eyed boy burst out, avoiding Colin's eyes.  
>"I left you standing there and simply ran away!"<p>

Colin smiled sadly.

"You also saved my life, remember? The spotlight would have crushed me."

Damian sighed and brushed through his hair.

"Still that doesn't make it right…"

Shifting a bit, so that he could face Colin, Damian cleared his throat.

"And I am not here to discuss the matter itself… I just thought maybe you'd like to know why I ran away."

When Colin nodded, he took a deep breath and looked around to make sure that no one was watching them.  
>He turned his back towards Colin and pulled up his black shirt, revealing countless scars.<br>Colin inhaled sharply.  
>The other day, he'd caught a glimpse of them but this was completely different.<br>His whole back was covered in them…  
>All kinds of scars were scattered on his tanned back, thin ones, probably from needles or wires, large ones from knives or whips, and ones that looked like from surgeries.<br>Hesitantly, Colin traced one running down Damian's whole spine with his finger, making Damian flinch at the touch.  
>Damian pulled down his shirt again quickly, and for a moment they remained silent, none of them knew what to say, until Colin broke the silence.<p>

"How'd you get them?"

Fearing a pitiful look on Colin's face, he turned to look into the green eyes and was met with determination and anger, but also a strange detachment.

"I… I got them over the years when I was trained as a child."

"Why so many surgical ones?"

God, Damian felt so strange… he hadn't expected Colin to ask him about them, no one ever had.  
>Most considered it too direct, which it was, but strangely, Damian welcomed the straight-forwardness of his friend, so he decided to answer.<p>

"My mother has a special way of treatment, I can be completely renewed, but it does leave scars to replace a shattered spine."

Colin nodded, obviously in thought.

"So during training, it didn't matter if your, let's say arms, were broken? She'd just replace them? Same with organs?"

"Yes, well she didn't do it herself. We had a team of doctors at home."

"And the other scars are from training?"

Damian nodded and scratched his neck.

"Among other reasons. I had to be hardened, taught how to handle pain, how to work through pain… and I have been blown up once, not completely, but it did blast one or two organs."

His hopes that Colin would calm down after hearing his reasons were shattered when Colin huffed angrily and Damian saw how the redhead clenched his fists.

He got up, but was held back by Colin, who grabbed his hand.

"Why are you leaving?"

Damian looked away.

"You are angry, there is no reason anymore for me to be here. I understand that you are upset and don't like me anymore. Keep the bike."

He tried to rip his hand out of Colin's, but to his surprise, the little boy was stronger… stupid Abuse.

"I am angry, but not with you!"

Damian laughed sarcastically.

"Who else? There's no one else to blame for what I've done."

He was pulled down and Colin shook his head.

"How can I not be angry? Your mother did this to you! She's a cruel b…woman, and I would really like to beat her to a pulp right now!  
>But you are not at fault, after seeing your scars, I know how it feels like to expose them to others.<br>The looks full of pity or the disgust, do you think after playing guinea pig for scarecrow, my body is flawless?"

he laughed sadly

"My body looks pretty much the same."

Normally, Damian would shoot back some kind of retort, claiming that Colin didn't know what he was talking about.  
>But to be honest, Colin did know what he was talking about…<br>Colin knew exactly how Damian felt when it came to scars.

"Sister Mary always told me that scars are like a map."

"A map? Really creative" Damian joked.

"Oh shut up" Colin said and punched Damian playfully  
>"She told me, that when you show someone that map, and that person manages to read it right, then that person will find a great treasure."<p>

He pointed at his own heart.

"I know it sounds extremely cheesy, but I think it is somewhat true, isn't it?"

Damian shrugged and smiled a bit.

"It would be beautiful, I guess."

He got up, wiping the dirt from his butt.

"But cheesy nonetheless" he said, now grinning down at Colin.

"Whatever" Colin laughed.

"Bike race?" Damian asked, giving Colin a challenging look.

"I thought you'd never ask."


	5. Fifth dream

Hello :D

Finally gotten around writing and uploading a new chap, rather long this time.  
>You may or may not have noticed that my Dami is a little bit angsty :S but when i imagine his childhood, i think thats inevitable.<br>Anyway, read and enjoy^^ and maybe review, i know i have a lot to learn, but i'd like to know what exactly :)

Music of my choice:  
>First and second part:<br>Kiss by Korn  
>I'm sorry I'm not perfect by Simple plan<br>you by switchfoot  
>set down your glass by snow patrol<p>

third part(the happy):  
>Do better by say anything<p>

* * *

><p>"Now please turn your head and look to your left, slowly."<p>

The old Doctor that examined Damian kept a gentle grip on the young boy's neck.  
>He was the old grandpa kind of doctor, and Bruce trusted him to take care of Damian adequately, so he simply observed them, leaning against the wall.<p>

Damian sat there, calm but tensed up, clawing the table he sat on in pain and maybe a little bit fear.  
>Bruce watched his son obeying all of the doctor's orders and answering all his questions.<br>It was Damian's second visit as simply Damian Wayne and not Robin, and if it hadn't been for his mother that had banished him and cut all their ties, he would have been treated there.  
>Damian clenched his fists at the thought.<p>

The others didn't know about the situation between them…

There was no use in telling them, nothing would change it and he wasn't entirely sure if he wasn't happy about it in a strange way.  
>More than once, though, when Drake told him to finally leave and go back to his insane mother, Damian would clench his fists like this and shut his mouth, biting back what he always wanted to shout into that stupid idiot's face.<br>That his mother didn't want him, and that he had no choice but to stay with the Wayne household, at least until he was old enough to take care of himself.

The doctor sighed and turned to talk to Bruce.

"It looks a lot better than the last time, but I am afraid that it will take a while to heal, just keep him off a climbing wall and I suggest him staying away from P.E as well.  
>Judging from the x-ray-pictures, I'd say that his spine was fractured, but has luckily not damaged any of the nerves.<br>He still has a skull that needs to recover and a major concussion. It is possible that he may get sick occasionally.  
>I'll subscribe you something against the pain and something for his stomach."<p>

"Thank you doctor" Bruce said, smiling widely.

"Come Damian, we're leaving."

Damian who was already dressed again, jumped down the table and left the room.  
>Bruce wanted to follow, but was held back by the doctor.<p>

"Mister Wayne, I knew your father well and I trust and respect your decisions.  
>But we both know that a fracture like this isn't caused by a fall. I guess a dull object."<p>

Bruce scratched his neck and smiled.

"He's a wild boy."

"A wild boy, that has gotten his head bashed in and is covered in scars?  
>With all due respect Mister Wayne, that does seem suspicious, and if I didn't know you as well as I do, I'd suspect child abuse…<br>But I know you, and I have carelessly taken care of many of your foster cases, but if my suspicion ever turns out to be true, then I will report you."

Great. Bruce sighed and patted the doctor's shoulder gently.

"I will look after him and keep him from climbing walls, okay?"

* * *

><p>"Did I cause you problems father?"<p>

Surprised, Bruce looked at Damian quickly, before concentrating on the traffic again.

"No, what makes you think so?"

Damian fidgeted with the seat belt. Why was he always so intimidated around his father?  
>Drake and Grayson always fooled around and talked casually with his father, while he awkwardly tried not to disappoint him with every move he made.<br>Of course, there were some unsolved conflicts and a bit of tension between his father and Grayson sometimes, but Pennyworth had told him that it had nothing to do with Damian.  
>They had been this way even before his father had found out about his son.<p>

"I heard you talking…" Damian mumbled

"Damian, you didn't cause any problems"

Bruce sighed and didn't look at his son.

"Just tell me, why did you chase after the spy, despite my orders?"

Damian frowned.

"He would have gotten away…"

"He has anyway. I expect you to follow my orders Damian."

"Yes father."

"It's the only way that it works as a duo…"

"I know, father."

Again, Bruce sighed deeply, causing Damian to look away.  
>The disappointment in his father's voice had been obvious and he felt his heart sinking, dark thoughts revolving in his head.<br>His father was disappointed…  
>He had no use for a disappointing son…<br>Just like his mother, his father would throw him away eventually and replace him…

When Bruce looked back at his son, he realized how he had just sounded, and he knew that the best thing would be to apologize.  
>But if Damian didn't realize that they had to work together, things like that would repeat themselves all over again, and one of them would end hurt.<br>Why was his son so damn stubborn? Why did he even have that son?  
>Damian was the only child that he'd never chosen to take care of,<br>and of course it had to be a child that was always trying to cause trouble, picking up fights with Tim and disobeying his orders.  
>Even if Damian hadn't been raised as a killing machine, his pride and arrogance clouded the boy's mind too often to make him an efficient partner.<p>

Sometimes he wished that Talia would take back Damian.

The rest of the drive home was spent in silence, and when they returned it was already evening.  
>Like always, Alfred greeted them happily and the three of them made their way to the dining room, where Tim already sat and waited for dinner to be served.<br>And as Damian saw his father walking over to Drake, patting his shoulders and the two of them laughing at something Drake said,  
>he felt sick and quickly backed out of the room to retreat into his room.<p>

* * *

><p>He locked the door behind him and noticed his dog Titus staring at him, from his huge pillow on the ground.<p>

"Hey, big boy" he said trying to keep his voice from shaking as he crossed the room to sit next to the dog.

He accidentally hit the desk with his back, knocking down one of the rare photographs he owned and cherished.  
>Luckily he caught it before it hit the ground.<br>Titus' eyes glued to him, he turned the frame to look at the picture.  
>It was a picture of Grayson and himself.<br>On the picture, Damian frowned and looked away arms crossed, while Grayson had one arm around Damian's shoulder and the other was seemingly holding the camera.  
>Of course, Grayson laughed at the camera and when Damian looked at them, all dressed in civilian clothes, he could swear it looked just like a normal family picture.<br>A sob escaped his throat and he hugged the frame to his chest.

A family that didn't exist anymore…

Grayson had left again and neither Father nor Tim needed him.

No one needed him…

He tried to keep tears from falling, but failed, and decided to let them be. He sat there, crying in silence, when Titus got up and sat down next to him.  
>The great Dane leaned a bit towards Damian, and it took Damian a while to understand the gesture, but he buried his face in the warm fur eventually, wrapping his arms around the dog.<br>After a while, he let go of the dog and got up, patting Titus' head in the process, to get a tissue and to change into something more comfortable.

He changed into comfortable sweat pants and a simple hoodie.  
>Before he left the room, he turned to Titus, who had settled on his pillow again.<p>

"Thanks, buddy."

* * *

><p>He walked down the stairs, feeling angry at himself.<br>It was weak to cry like this, and ever since that stupid incident, he felt more emotional as time passed.  
>It was as if something inside of him had been ripped open and that wound never really closed, blood leaking out from time to time…<br>When he arrived downstairs, he noticed that except from water running in the kitchen, he couldn't hear any sounds.  
>He stuck his head inside the kitchen.<p>

"Pennyworth, where are the others?"

The old butler turned to look at him surprised.

"Master Damian, would you like me to make dinner for you? The others already left for patrol."

Anger rose in Damian and he retreated, mumbling no.

Great… Drake was home one evening and suddenly Batman and Robin didn't exist anymore.  
>Though Damian knew that with his injuries, he wouldn't be allowed on patrol anyway, but he had hoped that his father would at least inform him.<br>Since there was nothing to do for him, he went to bed. Maybe he could at least assist his father during his investigations tomorrow.

* * *

><p>"Don't let him cramp your style" Talia said, smiling venomous as she disappeared, leaving her son behind.<p>

He stepped forward and held his sword to his father's throat.

"Father, I had imagined you taller." Bruce stared at the boy, at a loss for words.

Talia's minions let go of him and vanished. He caught himself, careful not to fall into the blade his  
>"son" was still holding up threatening.<br>It was like staring into a mirror that turned back time. The boy had the same facial structure and stubborn chin as him;  
>his eyes were of the same striking cold blue, and the same pitch black hair. But there were traces of his mother as well.<br>His skin had a darker shade and his eyes were shaped differently.  
>The boy, Damian, lowered the sword and gave Bruce a challenging look.<p>

"Don't you recognize me? Not at all?"

"I have never seen you before."

Damian frowned angrily

"That's right, you have never _seen_me… and you never will."

Something is off, Bruce thought. Not knowing how or why, but something was definitely off. It didn't start this way.

"What do you mean?"

Damian laughed.

"Since you never saw me, and never gave me a chance, I'll just take things into my own hands." He raised the sword.

Bruce saw that it was stained with blood, that hadn't been there before.

"Damian, what's happening? Whose blood..:"

"Oh that? That's the blood of all your "sons" that you preferred over me, your real son!"

Bruce felt all air escape his lungs.

"It was fun actually, especially Drake!" Damian burst into laughter.

"His face! You should have seen his face! Hilarious!"

It was too much, too much for Bruce.  
>He launched himself at Damian, almost expecting to feel the sword piercing through his armour and cutting deep into his flesh.<br>But nothing happened.  
>He knocked Damian over, used his arm to strangle Damian and stared into the blue eyes.<br>But instead of insanity and rage, he saw sadness and surprise.  
>Blood streamed down the boy's chin and Bruce leaned back in horror.<br>The handle of the sword Damian had held before was now in his own hands and the blade ran deep into Damian's lungs.

"f…the…r…" Damian pressed out, gasping for air and choking on his own blood.

Bruce got up quickly.

"No! Damian! I…I didn't" He tried to stop the bleeding, but it was too late, the life had vanished out of Damian's eyes.

Bruce picked up the body of the dead boy and held him close to his heart.

"How did this happen? I never meant to…"

He looked at Damian's face…

His son…

"Why did this happen?" he asked no one in particular, feeling his eyes sting.

* * *

><p>Bruce Wayne woke up screaming and bathed in sweat.<p>

A dream, he thought. It was all just a dream…

Still, he wanted to check on Damian, so he rushed out of the bed and into the hallway.  
>He stopped in front of Damian's room and put his hand on the doorknob.<br>He smiled to himself, Damian would be lying there, already awake and scold him for waking him up in the middle of the night for nothing.

"Master Bruce?"

Bruce turned to see Alfred walking towards him, looking concerned.

"What are you doing at this time of the night? I thought you took the day off." Bruce gave him a confused look.

"I just wanted to check on Damian." Alfred's face turned sad instantly.

"Oh Master Bruce..." He walked past Bruce and opened the door.

"No. you'll wake him!"

"Who?" Alfred said, pointing into the empty room.

Bruce gasped.

"What happened? Where is he?" Bruce wanted to rush into the room, but was held back by the  
>elderly Butler.<p>

"He is gone. He… died a year ago."

Bruce fell to his knees, not wanting to believe what he had just heard.

"How?"

Alfred patted his back but left without answering.  
>Bruce lowered his head, not able to bear the sight of the empty room anymore, when he heard an all too familiar voice.<p>

"That's easy to explain, Father."

Bruce raised his head quickly and stared into Damian's dead blue eyes.

"You killed me"

"Master Bruce? Are you all right?" Alfred rushed into the room, searching for the reason of the commotion his Master had produced.

Bruce calmed down and looked at Alfred, trying to catch his breath.

"It's… it's all right. Where's Damian?" A bit surprised the Butler furrowed his brows.

"Downstairs, finishing his morning exorcise. Why?"

Bruce sighed relieved and let himself fall back into the soft pillows.

"Any word from the others?"

"Master Timothy is still in bed and Master Richard has called before. They are all right. I am more concerned about you, though."

Bruce waved it off.

"I am okay, just had a bad dream."

"Hmm, anyway, breakfast is ready."

"Thanks Alfred…"

* * *

><p>Damian had just finished his exercises when Alfred walked into the kitchen, a worried look on his face.<p>

"Is father okay?" he asked, trying to sound indifferent.

Alfred shook his head and let out a sigh.

"He had a nightmare, quite intense I must say."

"About what?" asked Damian, but all Alfred did was shrug.

"Tt"

When Damian's father stepped into the kitchen, the boy looked up and eyed his father.  
>Before he could even greet him, Bruce rushed past him and started a conversation with the old Butler, completely ignoring his son.<br>But Damian had noticed the panicked look on his father's face, when he had seen Damian.

"Father?" Damian asked, not letting anything in his voice seem like he was hurt.

Bruce turned around but avoided to make eye-contact with him, earning a concerned look from the butler.

"What is it Damian?"

Damian slid down from the bar stool he had sat on before.

"Good morning Father. I have gathered some information about the drug cartel that you were investigating.  
>If you want to, we can investigate some more today, or tonight. Whatever suits you best."<p>

"I don't think I'll go over the case with you tonight Damian."

"Why not?" Damian asked, trying to keep his temper calm and composed, while underneath he felt betrayed.

Bruce scratched his neck and smiled apologizing.

"You know, Tim is at home. And It's been a long time since I went on patrol with him."

Damian squint his eyes and crossed his arms.

"With Drake? Why would you prefer to work with him? Isn't it Batman and Robin? And besides you went on patrol with him yesterday!"

"Damian, he is my son…"

"NO! No he is not!" Damian burst out yelling, no longer willing to accept the way he was treated.

"He is adopted! I am your son! He is a stupid…"

"Damian!" it was enough to silence him, but his blue eyes still burned with hate.

Bruce glared at Damian, the pictures of Damian and the blood stained sword racing through his head.

"Don't piss me off. Not today."

Damian glared back, and before his mind could shut his mouth, the words already escaped his mouth.

"If you didn't want all of this to happen, a simple condom or a little usage of your brain would have sufficed."

Both Pennyworth and his father stared at him, not believing what he had just said, and suddenly Bruce slammed his fist onto the counter.

"Do you really think I wanted this?" He growled, shaking off Alfred's hand as he walked over to stand directly in front of Damian, yelling down at him.

"I never asked for you and never asked your mother to drop you off here!  
>You are only here to sabotage my work and to be honest you are doing a pretty good job at that!<br>You have to be under constant surveillance because I never know when you are going to kill next!"

Damian took a step back, but Bruce followed.

"If you don't like it here then don't think I'll keep you here! Leave! Go back to where you came from!"

He closed his eyes and turned around, sighing and already regretting what he had just said.

"Damian…"

"He has already left, sir."

Bruce opened his eyes and met the angry glare of Alfred.

"Shit…"

"Indeed sir, what was that about?"

Bruce sat down on one of the chairs and buried his face in his hands.

"Alfred, that dream… Damian killed the others, to get their position and then I… I killed him. He can't stay here Alfred."

The butler huffed angrily.

"Didn't we have this kind of conversation before, sir? Master Damian is no killer anymore and you, well, the only one that dished out right now was you, right?"

"God…" Bruce sighed exhausted.

"It's just, Damian always gets under my skin you know?  
>Sometimes I want to hold him and laugh with him, but then he is his old self again and I really feel like strangling him."<p>

"Well, you are not really in any position to expect any welcoming behaviour from the young master."

"Why?"

"Ever since the boy came here, everyone except for Master Dick has considered him a threat and a cold killer.  
>No one saw the child inside of him.<br>I have to admit, it took me a while as well, but now I know that Master Damian is just as kind and vulnerable as all of his predecessors were.  
>Especially like one…"<p>

Alfred sat down facing Bruce.

"Do you remember when Master Jason was still Robin?  
>You kept him close and treated him like your son, despite, or even because you knew that he was a risk.<br>Now think about what would have happened if Master Jason hadn't ever died?  
>He would be like Master Richard, a little bit cockier, but still a good man.<br>You are simply afraid to loose another son, and loose him to crime.  
>You keep your distance to allow yourself the comfort of staying clean and not bearing the consequences of your son's life.<br>You don't want to go through such a failure again, though everyone except for you sees, that it wasn't your fault back then.  
>But it would be your fault if Damian grew up the wrong way now.<br>Instead of keeping him on the right way, you keep pushing him away."

Alfred got up and straightened out his jacket.

"Now I suggest you to look for your son and apologize."

* * *

><p>But even after hours of searching, Damian was nowhere to be found, his locator and his tracking device lying on his bed, discarded.<br>When Bruce still had no trace about his son's whereabouts the next morning, he decided to call Dick.

"Grayson" a tired voice, creaked.

"Dick, this is Bruce we have an emergency."

Bruce heard Dick shifting in his bed, probably sitting up quickly.

"Who is it? Roy? Tim?... Jason? Or is something wrong with…"

"Damian. He ran away, we can't locate him. Why are you worried about Roy?"

Dick cursed angrily.

"Forget about that, what have you done and since when is he missing?"

"We had an argument yesterday morning."

"Okay, I'll try to contact him, does he have his handy?"

"Yes, but like I said, you can't track him. He modified it."

On the other side a chuckle was heard.

"Have you tried to call him?"

Silence.

"Then how about trying that?."

"Dick, you know him better than I do and I don't have the nerves to handle him right now."

Dick sighed annoyed.

"No. You screwed up, you'll make it up to him.  
>I don't know what exactly happened, but it must have been something bad, or else he would simply sulk in his room."<p>

"I kind of made a rather big mistake."

"Wow, you admit it… what happened?" Dick asked sarcastically but not really alarmed.

"I… he really tested my nerves that morning and said something that made me snap…"

"What happened?" Dick pressed, growing concerned.

"I was angry, Dick, and didn't get a lot of sleep. I didn't want to say it, but I did."

"What. Did. You. Say?"

"I told him that I never wished for him to come here and…"

Dick cut him off, voice shaking angrily.

"You did what? How could you say that to a fucking child? Your child! Bruce you…  
>You know what? Don't even go and look for him, I'll get him."<p>

"Dick…"

"No. Don't bother." With that, Dick all but slammed the disconnect button and threw the phone down, getting up.

After he was fully dressed in his Nightwing suit, he grabbed the phone again, dialling Damian's number.

* * *

><p>Damian stared at the great clock hanging from the ceiling of the central station, wondering where the hell he was supposed to go now.<p>

He'd only packed a few things and enough money for some weeks, knowing that he was not welcome in the Wayne manor anymore… or anywhere for that matter.

The thought made his stomach twist and his heart tighten, but he had given up on pitying himself or crying. It was no use after all.

So all he could do right now was to figure out where to go.  
>He couldn't go back, and he didn't want to go to the titan's tower, because he was sure that he wasn't exactly welcome there either.<br>Before ending up here, he'd played with the thought of asking Brown for a place to sleep, but his pride wouldn't allow that.  
>Colin was out of the question as well, being an orphan himself,<br>and the last and first place that had come to his mind was the one he wanted to avoid the most.  
>Well, except the manor.<br>He knew that Grayson would take him in without hesitation, but that would mean that he had to explain why he had run off, and why he hadn't returned to his mother…  
>No, not a choice either.<br>Breaking down in front of Grayson was the last thing he wanted to do now.  
>He could handle hate and being completely ignored, but not the way Grayson made him feel vulnerable.<br>He sighed and drew his knees up on the bench he was sitting on.

Somehow, he'd manage. Getting a room in a hotel that didn't ask for an ID maybe… or…

He hesitantly dialled the number he had memorized in his head.

"Yes?" a cold voice answered.

"Hello, Mother…"

There was a moment of silence on the other side and Damian subconsciously started digging his nails into his knees.

"I thought I was clear about all of this the last time, I no longer acknowledge you as my son, so why are you calling?"

Damian's heart sank and he wished he'd never tried it.

"Mother… I need your help."

"Don't call me mother and don't call me anymore.

That was enough for Damian.

"Well fuck you! You are my mother!" he yelled, ignoring the strange looks he received from the people that passed him by.

"I am not anymore, you disap…"

"I did nothing but follow orders and obey you and father all my life! I…"

But it was no use, Talia had already hung up on him.

Damian cursed and got up, glaring at all those who dared to stare at him, causing them to keep walking.

He packed his stuff, still not knowing where to go and headed nowhere in particular, when his phone started to vibrate.  
>He fished it out of his coat pocket to see who it was.<p>

Grayson…

Ignoring it, he let the phone slide into the pocket again and decided to head towards the information desk.  
>Maybe he'd be able to decide where to go there.<p>

After about four tries, the calls stopped…  
>Feeling a bit sad and disappointed, Damian huffed at the dark screen, thinking that he was not worth more of Grayson's effort.<p>

They probably all stopped looking for him and were now glad that he'd finally left.

Sighing, he peered over the high counter of the information desk, cursing his short stature.

"Excuse me" he called, and a nice young woman with red hair greeted him with a smile.

"Well hello. Do you need a ticket? Or have you gotten lost?" she looked down, pleasantly.

"No, I am not lost. I need a ticket."

"Okay" she turned to look at the screen next to her and started typing.

"Where to?"

Damian glanced around and decided to take the first destination and the next train that would catch his eye.

"New York City. First class." Damn… he mentally slapped himself.

"Central station?"

Damian sighed and nodded.

The woman kept typing and he heard a printer behind her as she gave him a worried look.

"Are you okay?"

Damian nodded and held out his hand for the ticket and laid down some notes to pay.

Without waiting for the change, he turned around and headed towards the platform written on the ticket.

Why did he have to choose New York? Even if there was no guarantee that he'd stumble over Grayson, the possibility was still there.

He tried not to think about it when he climbed into the great train and sat down in an empty first class compartment.  
>The journey would take about three and a half hours, so he'd have enough time to figure out where to go from there on.<p>

* * *

><p>Slowly but surely, Dick was starting to panic.<br>Yeah, Damian was capable of taking care of himself, but he also knew that the young boy had quite the destructive moods,  
>and there were two ways they could play out.<br>If he snapped, he'd either beat criminals to a bloody pulp, or he'd get hurt.

There was no trace of him…

Neither Stephanie nor Colin knew anything and both had been patrolling the streets all night, looking for Damian.  
>After searching for almost two days, Dick decided to talk to Bruce but was stopped by Alfred in the hallway.<p>

"I suppose you are here to talk to Master Bruce, right sir?"

Dick nodded.

"I'm afraid he's out, chasing the Riddler."

The butler sighed when he saw the annoyed look on Dick's face and led him to the kitchen.

"Master Dick, I assure you he's sorry for what he's done. He really regrets…"

"Ever saying that and he feels terrible, blah, blah, blah…" Dick interrupted him.

"He's always sorry and feels bad about things; he just never takes care of them!  
>Is he out looking for his runaway son? No.<br>Is he looking for a way to make up the damage he's caused? Negative.  
>Is he chasing a crazy genius? Hell yeah!"<p>

Dick sat down on a bar stool and buried his face in his hands.

"Master…"

"Alfred I asked around and called up anyone who could know about his whereabouts…  
>The titans, Stephanie, Colin… heck I even contacted Talia!<br>And no one knows where he is.  
>I'm really worried about him Alfred."<p>

The old butler gently squeezed Dick's shoulder.

"I know…"

Dick looked up and laughed, sounding bitter.

"And do you know what the worst is? No one cared…  
>Only Colin and Steph sounded worried.<br>The others… even Talia doesn't give a fuck about Damian.  
>That's just horrible, I mean he can be a pain in the ass, but that's because of his twisted upbringing!<br>God, have you seen his scars?  
>I mean that kid has to be defensive and suspicious having grown up like this! He…"<p>

Dick searched for the right words and looked down on the counter.

"He's like a wounded animal, keeping everyone at a distance.  
>But as soon as he realizes that you want to help him and lets you inside his little world, he gives back so much.<br>Why can't Bruce realize that it's worth all the effort?"

At a loss of words, Alfred simply shrugged and stood there.

After a moment of silence he cleared his throat.

"Maybe it's for the best that you return to New York. It's been almost three days since he disappeared.  
>I think he's returned to his mother and she doesn't want you to know about it."<p>

Dick nodded and got up.

* * *

><p>Damian rang the bell for the third time and felt anger and frustration rise inside, when the door remained closed and no one came to greet him.<br>After spending one night on the train and one in a cheap, run down hotel, Damian found himself in front of Grayson's door.  
>Pure coincidence of course…<br>But Grayson was obviously not at home and Damian felt like kicking off the handle and simply walk in, but decided to wait.  
>He turned his back to the door and slid down, pulling the coat tighter to preserve his body warmth.<p>

Three days…

Three days was all he managed on the streets alone, until he came crawling back to the nearest familiar place.  
>His mother had been right, he was a disgrace…<p>

Damian hadn't even realized that he had fallen asleep, until he woke up in a different place...

He was surrounded by pillows and cushions in warm colours.  
>He heard himself giggle and struggle to free himself of them.<p>

A warm voice called for him.

"Damian, get out of there." Finally getting out, he looked up into bright and warm brown eyes.

His maid Salia was bending over him.

Scolding him playfully she shook her index finger at him.

"Little Master Damian! Hiding in there, tststs."

She reached down and pulled the young boy, about two years old, into her arms, watching him laugh and giggle, blue eyes shining up at her.

Gently stroking his black hair, she started rocking him in her arms and smiled when his tiny hands grabbed the brown hair that fell over her shoulder.

She was fully aware that Mistress Talia mustn't ever know about the way Salia treated the young master, but she couldn't help it.  
>This boy deserved a mother and the way he smiled at her always melted her heart.<br>He was already being trained, having to learn several languages at once and the other servants taught him how to handle a knife…  
>These little fingers weren't made to hold a knife though, not to kill…<p>

She sighed deeply and held Damian close to her heart, when he started to squirm in her arms, trying to climb up her shoulder.

"Little…"

Her protests were silenced when little chubby arms were wrapped around her neck and Damian clung to her, resting his head against her throat, eyes drifting shut.  
>Damian slowly fell asleep, but he clearly remembered the pleasant scent and the warmth of Salia.<p>

It was almost as warm as the drops of blood that dripped from his chin as the scene changed.

Once again he stood over the dead body of the only woman that had been a mother to him.  
>He ignored his mother's words and stared down at the lifeless body and thought of her last words.<p>

_I failed you… I am sorry, I love you Damian._

Tears mixed in with the blood on his face, but the dark of the room hid them from his mother.  
>A strange numbness took hold of Damian and he headed towards the exit, Salia's last words playing over and over in his head.<br>The room dissolved and Damian found himself in a floating state, feeling warm fingers on his face and a familiar scent filled his nose.

Salia...

Damian felt tears welling up and he let them fall.

"I'm sorry" he whispered "I am so sorry…"

* * *

><p>Dick still had plans to return to Gotham the next day, so he travelled in civil, forcing him to use the front door.<br>And god was he glad he hadn't climbed in through the windows, if he had, he wouldn't have stumbled upon the little sleeping bundle wrapped in a coat in front of his door.

He knelt down in front of the sleeping boy, gently touched his cold cheek, and felt tears on his fingers.

"I'm sorry" he heard Damian whisper "I am so sorry…"

At this moment, Dick's heart broke for Damian and he gently pulled him into his arms, and to his surprise, Damian clutched his jacked, burying his face in Dick's shoulder.

"It's okay Damian" Dick said, gently rubbing Damian's back.

He felt Damian shift and lift his head, and when their eyes met, Damian slowly pushed Dick away and wiped his eyes, glaring at him.

"Took you a while" he mumbled, still busy wiping his eyes.

Dick chuckled and shook his head.

"Do you know how long we were looking for you?"

Damian simply looked away and got up.

"Are you going to let me in or not? I can leave if you want me to."

Shaking his head, Dick pulled out his keys and they both went inside, climbing up the stairs to Dick's loft.

* * *

><p>Carefully eying his surroundings, Damian slid out of his coat and searched for a place to hang it, but decided to simply drop it on the spot for Dick to pick up and put it away.<br>He went into the kitchen to find something to eat, needing to take his mind off the dream that still haunted him.  
>When Dick entered the kitchen, Damian shot him and angry look.<p>

"There is nothing edible in this place."

Dick shrugged and leaned against a counter.

"Well I eat out a lot, and I usually don't have that many visitors. And if I do, I take them out. Anyway, what happened?  
>It is unusual for you to disappear for three days and wind up on my footstep crying."<p>

Damian blushed.

"I was not crying."

Ignoring it, Dick smiled at Damian, simply happy to know the boy was safe.

"I… We were worried about you Damian."

The boy huffed weakly.

"Yeah, sure."

Dick wanted to talk some sense into Damian, when he noticed that Damian was clutching his head and steadying himself on the counter, legs shaking.

"Damian?"

"I… I'm fine… just…"

The shaking legs gave out and Damian crashed onto his knees.  
>Dick knelt down immediately, grabbing Damian's shoulders.<p>

"Damian what's wrong? Did you get hurt?"

Breathing slowly, Damian shook his head.

"The poison… I get fits…"

"You mean the riddler's gas?"

Damian nodded and collapsed into Dick's arms.

Though it was a little difficult to stand up like this, Dick lifted Damian and carried him into the living area and gently placed him on the huge couch, draping a blanket over him.  
>He noticed that Damian was not asleep, but simply exhausted and weak.<p>

"God, why didn't you tell me? I thought that story was over."

Dick sat down cross legged on the floor in front of Damian and rubbed his shoulder, trying to soothe Damian, who took a deep breath.

"Father didn't want to worry you. And the fits have lessened over the last month."

"Do you want to sleep?"

Smiling pained, Damian shook his head.

"No. but I'll fall asleep eventually. How about you tell Fa… Bruce about my current location?"

It was less of a suggestion but a hint for Dick to go away. He understood and got up, leaving Damian only hesitantly.

* * *

><p>"Wayne?" Tim picked up.<p>

"Hey Tim. I just wanted to let you know that Damian's here."

A relieved sigh was heard from the other side and Dick smiled. He knew that Tim cared for Damian.

"So, when were you going to tell me about his sleeping fits?"

"Uh, Bruce told me not to Dick."

"Yeah, I figured as much. But seriously, this is information that should be passed on to me. I nearly  
>had a heart attack when he collapsed."<p>

"He did?"

"Yes so…"

Tim quickly cut him off.

"Keep an eye on him, seriously, and even if he starts to cry and stuff, don't touch him."

"Wh…"

"I mean it. He tried to strangle me once. And If I hadn't been trained for that kind of situation I'd be  
>dead now, believe me."<p>

Frozen in horror, Dick remained silent.

"Dick?"

"What does he dream about?"

"I think that changes, he told me about his dream though. But…"

"But what?" Dick asked, growing impatient.

"But he made me swear not to tell anyone about it.  
>All I can tell you is, that I think most dreams are about his past.<br>He usually gets really defensive and pissy when he wakes up."

Dick sighed.

"Okay, thanks for the advice, greet the others and tell Bruce that we'll have to talk. Night Tim."

"Bye…"

* * *

><p>Dick glanced over his shoulders to see if Damian was up already, and headed towards the couch.<br>Like before, he sat down, now with his back towards Damian and grabbed a book from his coffee table.  
>But he couldn't get himself to concentrate on the pages when his mind drifted back to the sight of Damian crying and whispering apologies in his dreams.<p>

Dick hadn't been aware that he was asleep, when something shifted behind him.  
>He started awake and turned to see Damian, frozen in the failed attempt of climbing over the back of the couch without him noticing, tears running down his cheeks.<br>Wiping them away with his Sleeve quickly, he tried to turn away but was held back by Dick who had grabbed his other hand.

"Dami… what happened?"

He slowly pulled Damian down onto the couch and was surprised by the lack of protest, as he sat down next to Damian.  
>Damian scooted away a bit, careful not to touch Dick.<br>Because somehow he always reminded him of how Salia died... had been killed.

"Damian, please talk."

The boy sighed and avoided Dick's worried eyes.

"It was just a dream."

"Not that… Why did you run away?"

Well, that was not what Damian had expected to be honest.

"Father made it clear that he didn't wish for me to stay, so I left."

"Damian, you know that Bruce didn't mean it like that…"

Damian laughed coldly.

"No, Grayson, I don't know how he meant it. From the way he reacts around me I'd already  
>suspected that he didn't want me."<p>

In a way, Damian was right.  
>Bruce always acted awkwardly around his son and tried to avoid him if possible.<br>It worked out as Batman and Robin, but not as Bruce Wayne and son.

"Ok, to be honest, I don't want to go there. I'll talk to Bruce about it but not right now.  
>Why didn't you go to your mother's?<br>I know that after the whole taking control drama you wouldn't be exactly thrilled to go back, but still…"

Damian clenched his fists.

"I had my reasons not to return there" he said through gritted teeth.

"Hmm. Okay."

Dick knew that it was useless to ask anymore.  
>Damian had already shut down and wouldn't open up so easily, so Dick did the only thing that jumped into his mind to get rid of the tension.<p>

It was only due to Damian being completely unprepared,  
>that he didn't kick Dick in the face when the acrobat jumped across the couch and tackled the boy and caught him in his arms.<br>He laughed loudly when he saw the baffled look on Damian's face that turned into angry instantly.

"Grayson!" he screamed, trying to get free "What are you doing?"

They wrestled for a moment leaving Dick with his arms wrapped around Damian in an awkward hug and Damian admitting defeat glaring at Dick.

"What was that for?" Damian hissed.

"Well, you kind of looked like a soaked kitty and I had to give you a hug. And you know how kittens react to those kind of hugs."

"They scratch out your eyes?"

"Exactly, hence the death grip." Dick laughed.

Though he was still glaring, Damian felt himself relax and leaned into Dick a bit, taking in the same familiar scent that had been there during his dreams.  
>Dick chuckled lightly.<br>It was rare for Damian to be cuddly like this and Dick felt a bit proud, knowing that he was one of the very few people to ever witness the proud boy like this.

"You know Grayson, you smell a lot like someone I once knew" he said, burying his face in Dick's shoulder to avoid showing his trembling lips.  
>He could barely keep his voice from shaking.<p>

"Really?" Dick asked smiling and rested his chin on Damian's head.

"Yeah, my maid. Well she was when I was younger."

"Was she nice?"

Damian couldn't speak anymore, afraid to burst into tears and nodded.  
>Feeling that something was off, Dick started to rub Damian's back.<p>

"You miss her, right?"

He didn't get any response.

"Hey "

Dick backed away a bit, but Damian kept his face hidden

"we could visit her if you want to."

Damian shook his head.

"Why not?"

Getting worried, he started stroking Damian's hair and noticed that his breathing had sped up.

"Damian if it's because of Talia, I am sure we can talk…"

Suddenly, Damian pushed Dick away violently and backed off, showing reddened eyes.

"It has nothing to do with my mother" he hissed.

"I did it! I had to! She corrupted my training!" Damian said more to himself than to Dick, who leaned back up and studied Damian calmly, already suspecting why Damian was so upset.

"What did she make you do?"

Damian looked into his eyes, looking exhausted.

"I killed her…"

"Why?"

"Because mother said she'd make me weak" he whispered, shoulders dropping  
>"And the head of the demon mustn't be weak."<p>

Dick fought the urge to hug Damian, but he knew that this time he'd walk away with a broken nose at best.

"You are not weak, Damian."

Laughing sadly, Damian leaned back and pulled up his knees.

"It doesn't matter anymore, she's dead, I am a disgrace to the house of Al Ghul and I am not fit to be a hero. End of story."

"Why would you think you are a disgrace?"

"I don't think, I know. Remember when we visited my mother after the whole disaster?  
>She made it clear for me. I am to never return to her and I am no longer her son."<p>

For a moment he almost told Grayson about his little brother, or clone, but decided to keep it back.

"She abandoned you? But… she is your mother."

Yeah, of course Talia was a bad mother, but Dick had never expected to give up her son so easily.  
>And while Damian only met his mother at the tender age of eight, Dick grew up with loving parents until their early death, making it even harder to understand.<p>

"She told me that she cannot love me for who I am… but honestly? I like the life I lead now" he shrugged

"Well, except for Drake and some other stuff, but all in all…"

Damian sighed and rested his head on his knees.

"Dami, I can understand that you don't want to go back. I know Bruce… but don't ever think that you are not part of this family."

The boy wanted to protest, but Dick cut him off.

"And if you don't consider yourself part of the Wayne family, at least accept that you are part of mine."

Damian stared at him, unsure of what to say but nodded eventually.

Hoping that Damian was now calm enough to accept some comforting from him, Dick scooted closer, but was met with a tired glare.

"Don't. I want to be alone…"

A little bit hurt by the rejection, Dick nodded and got up.

"I'll be in my bedroom. I need some sleep."

Damian didn't react and focused on looking out of the window, as Dick headed towards his sleeping area.

"Night, Dami."

No response.

* * *

><p>Dick was definitely not happy about the outcome of the evening and didn't sleep well.<br>He dreamt of Damian, cast out from the family, and whenever Dick wanted to help him he was held back by a great shadow.

But eventually, he was ripped out of his dreams when he felt the bed move and sink under weight.  
>Keeping his eyes closed, he analyzed the intruder, fingers itching to hit. But judging from the way the bed had sunk in, the person didn't weigh much…<br>He opened his eyes when the person slipped under the sheets and curled up next to him.  
>Damian was dressed in one of Dick's old shirts and he was barely able to hold back a chuckle.<br>It was at times like these that Damian was really a child, looking for approval and scraps of affection.

Dick moved, so that he was now lying on his side and scooted closer, draping one arm over Damian.

"Don't misunderstand Grayson" Damian said, eyes closed, and scooted closer almost unnoticeable  
>"It was simply cold on the couch.<p>

Chuckling, Dick pulled Damian into his arms and rubbed his back.

"Yeah, of course."

"Shut up…" but despite his distant behaviour, Damian rested his head against Dick's shoulder, letting himself enjoy the warmth that Dick emitted.

They laid there like this for a while until Damian looked up, an uneasy look on his face.

"You won't tell anyone about this, will you?"

Dick gave him a serious look.

"It's all over Facebook already."

"You have a Facebook account?"

Dick smirked when he saw the confused look on Damian's face.

"Yes I do, but I was joking."

"Pff, why would you have a Facebook account? That's very careless, being a vigilante and all."

"Maybe, but I am also Dick Grayson, part of the Wayne family. We do have a public image to uphold."

"Whatever, you'll keep silent?"

Nodding, Dick closed his eyes, falling asleep with a smile on his face.

* * *

><p>The next morning, he woke up to the sound of music playing on laptop quality.<p>

Reluctantly leaving the bed, Dick discovered Damian sitting on the couch with one of Dick's machines on his lap,  
>listening to one of Dick's albums and staring at the screen while typing quickly.<p>

"What are you doing Damian?" he asked, yawing and stretching.

As if caught doing something forbidden, Damian slammed the laptop shut and turned around.

"Nothing."

"Okaaay, I won't ask again. What do you want for breakfast? Waffles or Donuts?"

Damian simply shrugged and turned on the TV.

"_'I'd like to have both'_" Dick imitated Damian's higher voice

"But Dami, that makes you fat, and I don't want to get fat!"

He received a confused and annoyed look from Damian.

"_'Oh don't worry, you are extremely handsome already and have the perfect body!'_"

He watched Damian sticking out his tongue annoyed.

"Oh stop it you" he said, acting embarrassed.

"Shut up Grayson!"

Laughing, Dick headed towards Damian and tousled the boy's black hair.

"I'll get us breakfast, okay?"

"Just go already!"

* * *

><p>After getting ready, Dick left the loft and headed towards a bakery that stood across the street.<br>That bakery had saved his hungry ass often and the old lady was really nice.  
>Just as he was about to cross the street, his phone vibrated and he saw a push message from Facebook.<p>

'_Damian Wayne has added you as a friend… ignore/accept_'

"God" he sighed "Sometimes you really remind me of a kitten… aggressive and cold one second, and cute and surprisingly cuddly the next."

However, Dick Grayson was not the only one who had received a friend request.

About a week later, Stephanie Brown fell down her chair laughing, when she saw the message, earning confused looks from her mother,  
>while Colin Wilkes received a whole package with a letter:<p>

_Hello Wilkes,_

_This is the newest and best phone on the market. I modified it a bit so it's untraceable.  
>Of course the contract that goes with the SIM card is being paid for by me. I hope it is to your liking and that you'll find use for it.<em>

_P.S. I highly suggest you to create a Facebook account. All the normal kids these days have one… me too._

_Regards,_

_Damian Wayne_

Incredibly happy, he added Damian as soon as he finished loading the batteries.

He did feel a little bad about Damian sending him presents like that all the time without ever giving something bad,  
>but he knew Damian well enough to know that if he'd ever decline a present, Damian would understand it as a personal insult and probably never show up here again.<br>It was Damian's way to show affection, that's why Colin treasured the phone even more.

And even Tim Drake eventually got a message about a friend request.  
>Along with the request, he received a little note that hanged from his door one day.<p>

_Drake,  
>Even if I do not like you in the least and still wish you'd be thrown off some kind of cliff,<br>I am aware of the fact that we, as members of the Wayne family, need to uphold a public image and act as brothers.  
>So I politely ask you to accept this offer.<br>If you however do not accept, I shall of course acknowledge that and will see that you'll suffer a quick and painless death._

…_  
>Seriously I will.<em>

All he did was rip the note off and accepted the request, not able to hold back a grin the next time he saw Damian looking at him expectantly.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **So, i know the ending's a little, nyeh, sudden^^ but the problem with Bruce and Dami going home will have to take place in the next chapter ;)


	6. Sixth dream

Sooo, the continuation of the last chapter at last :D

songs of my choice:

how to save a life by the fray  
>set down your glass by snow patrol<p>

* * *

><p>"Are you sure that you've locked the door, Grayson?"<p>

Dick sighed and kept driving.

"Yes, Damian. I have locked the door."

"Turned off the…"

"Turned off the gas, shut off the TV and even activated the security system linked to Oracle.  
>Yes Damian, now could you please stop that? I won't turn around now. We'll arrive in ten minutes anyway."<p>

Damian huffed and looked out of the window.

"I didn't ask for you to turn around. I was just making sure you didn't endanger your loft."

Laughing, Dick turned to look at Damian.

"Every ten minutes? And of course, not closing the faucet would cause a major crisis. I know you are trying to stall Damian."

Ignoring Dick, Damian looked up as if he was thinking intently and nodded eventually.

"You definitely left the door open."

"Ok, that's enough."

Dick navigated the car to the roadside and brought it to a stop quickly.

He received a questioning look from Damian when he pulled the hand break and leaned back.

"We have talked about it, Damian. You need to talk to Bruce, and I think a week away from home was enough for you to come up with a mature conversation, right?"

"I am a child, Grayson. How can you expect maturity from me?"

Dick frowned and shook his head, leaning in a bit closer to Damian, looking right into the blue eyes.

"No. Don't pull the 'I'm a child and don't know anything about the world' card on me now.  
>We both know that you are old enough for a reasonable discussion."<p>

Before Damian could even protest, Dick squeezed his shoulder gently and smiled.

"And if it's of any comfort. Alfred and maybe even Tim are on your side.  
>Of course you know my view about this whole mess. This time you are the one who did nothing wrong and Bruce deserves to realize that."<p>

"I did tell him that he is not smart enough to use protection though."

Dick gaped at him and burst into laughter.

"Really? You told him that?"

Though he was supposed to feel bad about it, Damian couldn't help but chuckle a bit at Dick's reaction

"It's not funny, Grayson."

Shaking his head, Dick slowly stopped laughing.

"No it's not. Still, I'd have loved to see his face. But seriously now, Damian you need to go home."

A flash of hurt showed in Damian's eyes but he quickly turned away.

"So that's why you want me to talk to father…"

"What do you mean Damian?" Dick asked, looking confused.

"Nevermind…" Damian mumbled and started undoing his seat belt with one hand while trying to unlock the door with the other.

"Hey!"

He was held back by Dick who had grabbed Damian's hands and turned him around.

"What are you doing?"

"You just want to drop me off at the Manor to get rid of me!" Damian yelled into Dick's face.

"No Da…"

It was barely a whisper, being confused by the sudden change of mood.

"Shut up! I know that you do! You… ouch!"

He couldn't finish what he had started to yell, because Dick had crushed his forehead to Damian's, a bit harder than intended.

"You are an idiot Damian" Dick sighed

"When will you understand that I just want you to make peace with Bruce, because whatever you say, he is and always will be your father.  
>If he still acts like a jerk… well, then you'll come home with me. Got that? Now stop acting like that and don't even think about running away again."<p>

This time it was Damian who stared at Dick, mouth open a bit as if frozen in the attempt to talk, when Dick finally backed away, brushing his thumb over the red skin on Damian's forehead.

"Fuck, I forgot that you still have a recovering skull and spine. It was not intended to be so rough. Sorry."

Damian shook his head and fastened the seatbelt again.

"It's okay… thanks. I think I just freaked out a bit."

Dick smiled gently and cupped Damian's face with one hand.

"Don't worry. That's what I am here for."

* * *

><p>When they finally arrived at Wayne manor, Damian didn't hurry to get inside and walked a bit behind Dick, feeling a lot safer when he was near his big brother.<p>

He didn't really know what to expect when the door was opened after ringing the door, but Drake looking worn out and exhausted was not amongst the scenarios in his mind.  
>And when Drake gasped and threw his arms around Damian, the younger boy shrieked in surprise.<p>

"What the heck Drake?"

"Shut up Damian" he said, sounding tired "Just please take care of your dog… I think he plans to kill me."

He let go of Damian and greeted the laughing Dick.

"It's not funny. I think the dog is convinced that I was the one who chased Damian away… and he is one vicious beast. Don't ask me why Alfred made me take care of him…"

After a moment, Tim focused on Damian again.

"Uhm, well hi" he said awkwardly scratching his neck. "Feeling better?"

Damian, who was still startled from the sudden hug, nodded mechanically, making Dick laugh even harder.

"Well, anyway. Come in, Alfred…"

Tim froze, when a loud growl was heard behind him.

"Dear god, why?" he whined.

Smiling a bit, Damian walked past Tim and held out his hand, waiting for Titus to come.

"Hey, buddy. It was not Drake's fault."

The dog stopped immediately and barked happily, wagging his tail, before charging towards Damian, who knelt down and started petting Titus.

Dick smirked at Tim.

"Now how come you are terrified by such a cute little doggy?"

"He is neither cute nor little! He was scheming to kill me! I swear!"

Damian turned his head a bit and grinned at Tim while whispering into Titus' ear.

"Good boy, very good boy."

While Tim glared at Damian, though not as serious as usual, Dick chuckled and walked into the kitchen.

"Welcome home Damian" Tim said, a little bit embarrassed, and held out his head.

Maybe a little bit hesitantly, Damian took it und pulled himself up.

"Thanks…" he mumbled, as they both followed Dick, Titus happily next to Damian.

Despite always having tried to keep a distance to the old butler, Damian felt relieved and happy when he saw his own feelings mirrored in the warm and sharp eyes of Pennyworth.

"Master Damian, I am so glad to see you again, sir."

Slowly and carefully, Alfred approached him and Damian allowed the old butler to hug him gently.

"Thanks Pennyworth. I am glad to be home."

And this time, he was almost sure that he really meant it, feeling that even Drake was happy to see him, was unexpected, but not unwelcome.  
>He let go of Alfred and sat down on one of the bar stools.<p>

"I am preparing dinner at the moment, you will join us, right?" the butler asked, and smiled at Damian.

"I think so. Living with Dick for a week definitely left me craving healthy and well prepared meals."

He chuckled to himself, not noticing the surprised look on Alfred's face.  
>Damian usually never complimented Alfred's cooking, he'd rather complain and moan about it.<br>Alfred smiled and made to prepare dinner, while the other three retreated to the living room.

Already feeling completely at home, Tim and Dick slumped down on the couch, turning on the TV.

Quietly and a little bit hesitant, Damian sat down in front of the coffee table, allowing Titus to rest his head on Damian's lap, and started to gently stroke the black fur.  
>The atmosphere was awkward, and while Dick was kind of used to it by now, Tim couldn't help but break the silence somehow.<p>

"So, Damian…" he started, carefully not to provoke the little demon on the floor, which just turned his head and raised an eyebrow.

Tim noticed that Damian somehow looked a lot older, as if the events of the past two months had exhausted him.

"If… god I can't believe I'm going to say that…"

Now he had not only Damian's but Dick's attention as well.

"If I have done anything wrong, I don't know, hurt you or something… then I am sorry. I didn't mean to chase you away or anything, you know?"

Next to him, Dick chuckled and continued zapping through the program, deciding that the situation wouldn't escalate and wasn't demanding his attention any more.  
>Damian stared down, and Tim couldn't believe his eyes… Damian looked ashamed.<p>

"It was not you Drake. Didn't father tell you?"

Tim shook his head.

"We had a fight and I…"

"Bruce was being a jerk. You know, like big time, Tim" Dick interrupted.

"What did he do?"

"That is none of your concern, Drake!" Damian hissed, and to Tim's horror, Titus started snarling at him, thinking that his master was in danger.

"Good doggy, calm down…" he stuttered pulling up his legs on the couch, making Dick burst into laughter.

Damian grinned and calmed down his dog, when they heard a door slam shut.

The brothers exchanged alarmed glances and Tim got up and left the room to greet Bruce, while Dick helped up Damian and stood next to him, protectively.  
>Despite feeling stupid at how Dick shielded him, Damian was happy and slid a bit closer when Bruce stepped inside, followed by Tim.<br>As Bruce tried to step closer though, Titus jumped forward and bared his teeth, growling and barking.

"Titus, down!" Damian hissed, embarrassed that his father had witnessed Titus in such an untamed manner.

The dog obeyed immediately, not allowing himself to look away from Bruce.

"Hello Damian."

He nodded towards Dick.

"Dick"

Bruce stepped closer and sat down on the couch, ignoring Titus' death glare.

"We need to go over the Riddler case tonight, I…"

"Bruce" Dick cut him off, looking determined.

"No. I won't talk about the case now. I want you to talk to Damian, and first of all, if you feel any remorse, apologize."

Behind Bruce, Tim turned to leave the room, deciding that it was really none of his concern.

"Wait, Tim. I want you to hear it as well. Just so you know about the thing that went down here, maybe you'll get a little bit of a clue about how Damian feels."

Damian stared on the ground, Dick sounded as if Damian was a little helpless baby and they were all in a family therapy session…

"Grayson, it's okay…"

"No. no it's not Dami!" he turned to Bruce "now apologize."

"Dick, this is ridiculous…"

Dick threw up his hands and sighed annoyed.

"You both are blockheads! I just want to solve this and if you know a better way, do it!"

"Well, maybe you have to realize that it has nothing to do with you either, Dick."

Bruce sat there calmly and watched Dick's face turn from annoyed to hurt.

"I will talk to Damian, don't worry Dick. But I do not want you or Tim here at that time, this is something between the two of us."

Just as Dick opened his mouth and rose his hand, probably to yell at Bruce, Damian gently touched his shoulder.

"Grayson. Thanks, but he's right."

Shooting desperate looks at Tim, who just shrugged and left, Dick turned to Damian and nodded eventually.

When he passed Bruce, he grabbed his arm.

"And it is of concern to me. Just because it wasn't me that messed up, doesn't mean that I am not involved."

Bruce nodded and smiled wryly.

"I know. But we will talk afterwards, okay?"

After a moment of silence, Dick finally let go and left, leaving a nervous Damian and a clueless Bruce behind.

* * *

><p>Damian was still standing next to the couch awkwardly, not sure how to act around his father comfortably, but that was nothing new.<br>What surprised him, was seeing his father struggle as well.  
>It was not as if Bruce was sweating and fidgeting.<br>But just like his son, he was tensed up, eyes darting around occasionally and he sat there like a statue, clutching his hands.  
>In a way it was funny and comforting to see that they had something in common, at least it was comforting to Damian.<br>He felt more equal to his father, even if only a tiny bit.

Eventually, after a while of awkward silence, Bruce cleared his throat and actually managed to look into Damian's eyes.

"So, how have you been?"

Deciding, that simply standing there was not actually comfortable, Damian walked over to the couch and sat down, keeping a healthy distance to his father.

"Fine, I guess."

"Great… have you been eating regularly?"

Damian nodded and chuckled slightly.

"Though not actually healthy stuff, it's a miracle that Grayson is still in shape."

"Yeah…" Bruce smiled, but it faded quickly.

"Damian… what I said…"

He stopped, seeing Damian shaking his head.

"I… I have to apologize for yelling at you, father, and for being disrespectful."

"You were disrespectful, but so was I."

"You are my father…"

"But it doesn't change the fact that I did wrong, not you."

Damian frowned.

"Father, I disappointed you… "

Sighing, Bruce gently squeezed Damian's shoulder and pulled him a bit closer.

"You didn't. It's just… I disappointed you."

Before Damian could disagree, Bruce continued.

"This is all new to me somehow, you know?  
>Now I know, I took in Dick, Jason and Tim before you, but all of you are unique and different cases.<br>When Dick came to me, I was younger and he had already been raised to be a good boy by his parents.  
>He was driven by pretty much the same thing that drives me, and he grew up without needing me as much as for example Jason did.<br>Jason… he was a good boy, but somewhere deep inside he harboured chaos.  
>I tried to help him, find a way to control it.<br>I kept him close to monitor him and pull him back when he did wrong, but I failed eventually.  
>I couldn't protect him…"<p>

Damian listened, surprised and taken off guard by the open way his father talked to him, allowing him to see a vulnerable side of the Batman, and Bruce Wayne.  
>And he could see that it took a lot for his father to talk, within minutes, his father had aged visibly…<p>

"You know what happened to him, and what he is now... "

Bruce stopped for a moment, probably thinking about everything that had gone down between Jason and him, and Damian felt bad for him.  
>He fought the urge to pet his father's head like Dick did, whenever Damian felt down.<p>

"Then Tim came, and he was an entirely different boy all in all.  
>But once again I didn't have to raise him from scratch, though he did have his flaws, just like Dick. Now, about you…"<p>

Bruce smiled.

"When Talia first brought you here, I thought that I had another Ra's in front of me, and I actually was pretty terrified of keeping you.  
>But despite your initial problems, you have proven to be a great help and addition to this family…<br>And the way I acted, and what I said… there is no apology for it, and I really regret ever having said all of that, but… part of it was the truth."

The change from an encouraged smile, to plain hurt and finally a blank mask on Damian's face was quick, but not quick enough for Bruce to miss.

"Damian, it was not because I hate you, or something you have done at all.  
>It's because I don't know how to handle this situation.<br>You see, you have been raised to go against all that I believe in and have taught the others.  
>It's as if I look at you and see a darker and younger me…<br>A me that doesn't hesitate to kill and sacrifices his own emotions in turn for the ability to get rid of everything that stands in its way.  
>And that scares me…"<p>

Damian couldn't bear to face his father anymore…  
>His mother had always trained him to be this monster and his father wanted the exact opposite.<br>He felt torn between two worlds and despite all his efforts, he'd never fit into one of them, Damian thought.

Casting his eyes downwards, he bit his lip, keeping it from trembling.

"But you know, every time I took in a child I was scared.  
>The only difference between you and all of the others is that you are my son… my responsibility.<br>I cannot just get myself to think that even if you are here with me now, you are not really a part of me.  
>And I cannot blame you for my mistakes.<br>That's why I have decided to quit running and denying…"

What came next, surprised Damian enough to make him gasp.  
>Bruce took Damian into his arms and pulled him close to him, arms around him strong and protective.<br>He rested his head on Damian's and smiled into the black hair.  
>For the first time he really felt love for his son, without the nagging feeling of responsibility and fear of failure.<br>He knew that for the moment everything seemed to be okay, but that wouldn't last forever.  
>It would take a lot of effort to make it up to Damian from now on.<p>

"You are my son, Damian, and I love you, just like I love the others… please forgive me for being a horrible father."

Slowly, Damian clutched the fabric of his father's shirt and took in the warm, spicy scent of his father.

"So, can I come home?" he asked, hesitantly into his father's shoulder.

Bruce chuckled and squeezed his son a bit tighter.

"Yes, of course."

"About my mother…"

"I know about the whole situation, don't worry, this is your home now."

Damian pulled away and gave Bruce a questioning look.

"How did you know?"

Smiling smugly, Bruce replied: "I'm Batman, Damian."

* * *

><p>After dinner, Dick searched for Bruce, and found him in his study, going over the Riddler case.<p>

"So, judging by the way Damian acted during dinner, things have calmed down?"

Bruce looked up and nodded, gesturing for Dick to sit down.

"We had a good talk…"

As soon as Dick had settled in one of the comfortable chairs, he sighed and nodded towards the tons of paper strewn across the great desk.

"Any progress?"

"Dick…"

"I mean maybe an antidote yet? I heard some of the Riddler's hench…"

"Dick!"

"Yes, that is my name actually, thank you" Dick answered, sounding aggressive.

"Dick, we need to talk."

"No kidding, that's why I am here in the first place."

Leaning back in his chair, Bruce rubbed the bridge of his nose.

"Dick, I am very happy about your concern for Damian, but the way you keep… how can I say it…"

"Being a real parent to him?"

Now it was Bruce's time to sigh.

"Kind of, yes…"

"Bruce, you never showed any interest in your son.  
>And I always was the one to pick up the pieces, take care of him, show him how to do good and not to stray off the right path.<br>All you keep doing is reject him and destroy his confidence with your speeches about how to be a good man, but never show him."

Dick leaned closer and smiled a bit.

"And I know that you had a nice talk with him and all.  
>And I really appreciate that, but talk is talk and it will show just how much action is behind these words.<br>I know that you can be a great father and mentor, so I believe that you can do it.  
>But Damian doesn't know that and I swear to you, if you keep messing it up with him, I'll take him in one day."<p>

Obviously thinking about what he had just heard, Bruce sighed.

"Dick, I don't really know how to handle him, I swear I'll try, but I'm afraid I'll need your help."

Dick nodded and smiled, gently, but a little sad.  
>For him, that meant that maybe Bruce would someday take his place as the one who guided Damian through his life…<br>One day, Damian wouldn't need him anymore, but that was the way of life.  
>After all, Dick was not Damian's father…<p>

"Of course, Bruce."

* * *

><p><strong>AN:** Hello again :D  
>And even if this seems like a good last chapter, i have decided to take this story even further.<br>I am already working on a chapter involving Jason and another one with Stephanie and Dick.  
>Also, i have come up with three different endings. One of them will finally explain why i really named this story caught in a dream.<br>I will write and upload all three of them, and you can choose which ending you like best :)

Now to the involved persons in this chap:  
>Bruce : i know he's a little i dunno sentimental and strange in my version, but that's just my Bruce<br>Dick: in my head, Dick's a total sucker for sweets and fast food XD also, i think that he isn't too thrilled about Bruce and Damian bonding too much, because he secretly wishes to be Dami's dad.  
>Tim: God, i don't know Tim at all :S i will have to change that some day<br>Dami: i think that he really thinks that he did wrong, he was raised to worship his parents and so i think that he is surprised by his father's attempt to explain the rejection.

Further notice: I didn't include a dream here, because it was more of an extension of the last chapter than a standalone.  
>And even if everything looks all peachy now, things will only stay this way for a short time :P<br>so, please review and tell me how to improve, and if you'd like you can suggest a character and i'll try to write a chapter with it.


	7. Seventh dream

**A/N: Sooo, a new chapter folks ;) a happy one this time.  
>I am terribly sorry for the delay, but either the site wasn't working or i was busy with work and school :(<strong>  
><strong>This is the chapter with Jason and it's my first time ever writing him, so please be gentle with the comments XD<strong>  
><strong>If you have any questions as to why i wrote him like that, PM me or write it in the reviews :)<strong>

**recommended song: good life - one republic  
><strong>

* * *

><p>"Fuck!"<p>

Damian cursed, leaning against a brick wall.

He had spent the day playing *cough* training with Colin, and should have been home already, if it hadn't been for his stupid condition.  
>Though the sleeping fits, caused by the Riddler's poison had lessened, they would still take over occasionally and knock Damian out cold.<br>And now, he was leaning against that damned cold brick wall, in the slums of Gotham, soaked from rain that didn't seem to ever stop, struggling not to fall asleep.  
>Great...<p>

For a moment, it appeared as if Damian could regain control over his trembling legs again, when he suddenly collapsed on the ground.  
>Dressed in civil clothes, he was an easy victim to criminals…<br>he cursed once again before passing out.

* * *

><p>Okay…<br>That was definitely not what I had expected, thought Jason Todd to himself as he stumbled upon the boy, lying on the floor unconscious but shifting in his sleep.

It had supposed to be a normal and ordinary Day for Jason a.k.a. Red Hood, patrolling his turf and controlling all of his establishments.  
>He scratched his neck, making up scenarios in his head, what he could do with the young robin… or now Damian Wayne, son of a billionaire.<p>

He could keep him, train him and make him a new, better Robin, ruthless and willing to kill for his justice…  
>Or he could use him as a tool to annoy Dick… well that sounded great!<p>

But in the end, all he did was pick up the unconscious boy and carry him into his own little cosy hideout.  
>After having stripped Damian out of soaked clothes and got him into some of his old clothes.<br>He placed the boy on the old couch, took off the mask and pondered on what to do now, and how the boy had wound up like that in the first place.

Suddenly, he was ripped out of his thoughts, when Damian's phone started ringing.

"Fuck?"

Slowly, Damian opened his eyes and while he was not entirely awake, he picked up his phone.  
>Jason watched with fascination how the practically still sleeping boy managed to answer the phone, eyes half closed and unfocused.<p>

"Yeah?" he answered, voice still dripping with fatigue.

"No" Damian sighed "I'm okay, just watching a movie over at Colin's I'll be home soon."

"Really, yes. Shut up I'll be there like in an hour or so."

Damian hung up, and let his head drop on his arms again.

Jason got up, chuckling and bended over the sleeping boy, when suddenly Damian turned around in an instant and attacked Jason.  
>The older man tumbled backwards and hit this head on the coffee table, with Damian, now wide awake, sitting on top of his chest, holding a knife to Jason's throat.<p>

"Now, Todd, why did you kidnap me?"

"Screw you! I didn't kidnap anyone! Well not now at least." At that, Jason smiled smugly.

Damian pressed the knife into Jason's skin a bit more, drawing tiny drops of blood.

"I want to know why you took advantage of me, lying there unprotected!"

"Look, if I had wanted to hurt you, I would have done it a long time ago. I saw you and helped you because... you know I am not a villain."

"The last time I let my guard down around a tied up lunatic, I got poisoned. So give me one good reason to let you live…" Damian hissed.

"You got tricked by a tied up lu… wait, are you talking about the joker?" Jason laughed out loud.

"That bastard! Simply cannot take his hands off of Robin's can he?"

Amused by Jason's sympathy, Damian chuckled.

"I did beat him up with a crowbar before he got to me though."

Jason stopped laughing and studied the young boy sitting on his chest thoroughly.

"Really?"

For a moment, Damian was surprised by the sudden change of Jason's mood and answered only hesitantly.

"Yeah, why?"

"You are my favourite little Robin, you know that?"

Damian shuddered.

"Now you sound like a creep…"

Again, Jason laughed, though he had to stop, when Damian jumped off his chest and pressed most of the air out of his lungs.  
>He sat up and watched Damian heading towards the door.<p>

"I have to go now" Damian tugged at the borrowed clothes "I'll return them after washing them."

With that, the little Devil disappeared out of the door, leaving behind an amused and confused Jason.

* * *

><p>About a month later, Jason was sitting on top of one of his Casinos, watching out for a gambler that was trying to cheat him out of his money.<br>Well not with the red hood, Jason thought, smiling under his mask.  
>But even after two hours of scoping out the place, the slimy bastard still hadn't shown up and Jason felt a little bit insulted that the guy didn't have the balls to show.<br>The night wasn't going to get much more interesting, so he got up and wanted to leave, when red and black flickered in the corner of his eye.

Faster than he'd have liked, he was on his back, a frowning Robin once again sitting on his chest, holding a taser to his head.

"I am not here to fight, so don't even think of pulling any of your tricks" he hissed, pressing the taser closer to Jason's temples.

Jason held his hands over his head, demonstrating that he didn't plan to.

After Damian pulled the knives and a gun out of Jason's belt, he backed up and watched Jason getting up.

"You know, you shouldn't attack a person if you want to talk peacefully" Jason mused and brushed the dirt of his trousers.

He now saw that Damian was holding a rather big bag behind his back.

"What's in there?"

Damian pulled out a smaller bag, and handed the big one Jason.

"The clothes you gave to me. Pennyworth washed them and ironed them, so they're as good as new."

Jason smiled, but felt his heart sink a bit. Pennyworth always took care of everything in the bat family, and it was strange for Jason to be included in those services still.

"Well, thanks. So what's in the other one?"

Damian nodded towards the edge and walked towards it.  
>Jason followed him, took off his red helmet, and sat down next to him, when Damian began to pull out a metal lunch box with the superman symbol on it.<p>

"What the heck is that?" Jason said, laughing.

Damian growled at him.

"This does not belong to me. As if I'd ever own a useless thing like this. It's Drake's, but I didn't have a better container."

"Container for what?"

The box was opened quickly and a familiar scent tickled Jason's nose.

"Cookies?"

Damian nodded and handed the box to him.

"Pennyworth made them and forced me to bring them to you. Don't ask me why. In my opinion cookies aren't healthy or anything, so why would he…"

"Have you ever tasted one of Alfred's cookies?" Jason interrupted him.

When Damian shook his head, Jason took one of the still warm cookies and shoved it into Damian's mouth.

He had to dodge the punch Damian had aimed at his head, but the surprised look on the boy's face was worth it, and Jason grinned satisfied.

"So, still uncertain why these are considered as a thank you gift?"

"Their taste, although rather compelling, do not change the fact that they are very unhealthy and make you fat. Why would anyone thank you by making you fat?"

"So, what? Would you hand a curvy girl a weight watchers member card on your first date?"

Damian actually looked as if he gave it a real thought.

"You can't be serious…"

"Why not? I mean it is honest and shows that you care, right? Isn't that what women want?"

Once again, Jason laughed and playfully patted Damian's back.

"Boy, no one knows what women want, but I know that this is definitely nothing a woman would want you to do."

He watched Damian frown and handed him another cookie.

For a moment they sat there in comfortable silence, munching cookies and staring into the night sky.

Absentmindedly, Jason started playing with the bag that contained his clothes, and he remembered the first time he met Alfred…

"Is there something wrong with your clothes?" Damian asked, a little upset.

Jason chuckled.

"Not at all, it's just. Did Alfred say anything?"

While finishing his cookie, Damian nodded.

"He told me to tell you that you should eat up, wash your clothes more frequently and that you should stay low for the moment.  
>Father doesn't know about all of this by the way."<p>

Smiling sadly, Jason grabbed for the last cookie, but Damian had already snatched it and was about to take a bite.

Before he could, he noticed Jason looking at him.  
>He looked from Jason to the cookie, sighed and handed it to Jason.<p>

The older man took it smiling widely, and Damian put away the now empty box.

"So, I think I need to go" Damian said, standing up.

"And to be honest, I think that I might show up once again, you know, for cookies."

Jason nodded and watched as Damian took off, swinging through the streets of Gotham. 

* * *

><p>While unpacking the bag, he noticed that a piece of paper had fallen out.<br>Jason picked it up and smiled when he saw the neat and beautiful handwriting.

_"Dear Master Jason,_

I hope you are well and try to keep out of too much trouble.

_The cookies were your favourite, at least as far as I can remember, so they should have been to your liking._

_If possible, I'd like to know how you are and that you are still doing well._

_Sincerely,_

_Alfred."_

After reading the lines over and over again, Jason sat down on his couch and thought about a good reply.  
>It took him some time, but eventually he held an adequate letter in his hands.<br>Now he only needed to get the letter to Alfred without Bruce noticing.

Well, the first thing he'd do tomorrow, was getting some decent cookies.


	8. Eight dream

**A/N: New chapter :D**

**hope you'll like it, because i can't really judge it anymore XD i just write down my thoughts, no idea if it's good or bad :)  
>BTW, i decided not to post the three endings after all, i will include these scenarios though, just not as an ending :)<br>**

* * *

><p>"You stupid fat chick!" Robin yelled, the wind whipping his face merciless, while he tried to keep holding onto Batgirl's lifeless body that threatened to slip away any minute.<p>

He was lying on his stomach, using one arm to keep himself from falling over the edge of the destroyed building while the other was clawing Batgirl's bloody hand.  
>The weight of her pulled him down, and the wound in his side felt as if it was ripping apart his whole body, warm blood forming a puddle that made it even harder not to fall.<p>

"PLEASE!"

He was crying now, tears caused by both the pain and the desperation that was slowly taking over the young boy.  
>This was no dream, he knew that, but still he wished that he'd wake up.<br>He'd realize that he'd been crying in his sleep and would wipe away the tears embarrassed by the whole thing.  
>Like every day he'd get up and follow his daily routine…<p>

But this was real…  
>The blood, the weight, the pain and the fear were real.<br>He didn't even know if Batgirl was still alive! She could be dead for all he knew, but that was completely unimportant to Robin.  
>If she really was dead, she'd deserve a proper burial and not being scratched off the filthy concrete of Gotham…<br>The attempt to pull her up made his arms shake, and he almost dropped her.

He realized on e thing…  
>He'd never save her…<p>

It had all started out so well…  
>For the first time in three months, Damian had been allowed on patrol again… <p>

* * *

><p><strong>1 to 2 hours earlier<strong>

Batman and Red Robin were busy helping out the Justice League and so Bruce had allowed his son to patrol a bit, after having approved of Damian's condition.  
>He enjoyed the sensation of flying through Gotham at night and realized just how much he had missed it, when a black and purple figure landed on the gargoyle next to him.<p>

"Hey, Robin! Out of the nest again I see!"

Robin sighed and turned his head, knowing that he'd meet the wide smile of Batgirl…

"Hey fatgirl! How nice of you to notice that, try to be nice to that poor gargoyle as well, I can hear it crying under your fat butt."

The frown he provoked was all the satisfaction he needed, so Robin took off again, noticing that Batgirl was following him.

They swung together over buildings for a while, and it almost felt like the old days to Robin, so he allowed himself his old smug smile.

Though he'd never admit it, he really liked to swing around with Batgirl.  
>She always searched for detours as long as they weren't busy and she had shown him some of the most beautiful places that could be found in a filthy city like Gotham.<p>

But when the communicator buzzed and Nightwing called for Robin as backup,  
>they took the quickest route to the multi-story-building that was probably crowded with Black Mask's henchmen.<p>

They landed on the roof, where Nightwing was already waiting for them, wearing his new red costume.

"Nightwing" Robin greeted him, while Batgirl flashed him a smile and waved

„I didn't know that you were patrolling around here, why didn't you tell me?"

Robin tried to hide his disappointment that Nightwing obviously hadn't felt like patrolling with Robin.

„Actually, i wasn't" Nightwing replied. „Batman sent me a message that he had gotten a clue about Mask using this as a hideout.  
>And usually we'd simply wait for him to return, but i recorded some of their communication and found out that they were planning on attacking the Gotham Police Department tomorrow.<br>We need to take them down now."

Gently, Nightwing squeezed Robin's shoulder.

"Are you okay? If it's too much, i can still call black bat or someone else."

Robin shook off his hand with a huff.

"So what's your plan?"

"From what I've heard, they do not store weapons here, at least not big ones.  
>However, the ones who got access to the docks, where i suspect mask to store them, are in here.<br>We will have to be stealthy and not hasty."

"So sneak in and get what we need?" Robin asked as he walked towards the edge of the building, watching the guards patrolling the area.

The Batgirl snickered and turned to Nightwing.

"I doubt that this is a sneak mission, seeing as I am here."

"Batgirl, you have improved a lot! But actually no. we are going to take them out.  
>I don't want to alarm them or anything, but the weapons are not what bothers me the most about Mask.<br>He is gaining more and more influence, so we need to take down as many of his guys as we can."

"But you just told us to be sneaky" she noticed.

"Well you don't need to blow up the building or race them through the whole area screaming to take them out, now do you?" Robin returned smirking at her.

"Gee, that's not what I meant!"

"Whatever guys" Nightwing interfered, preparing himself.  
>"Robin, you'll climb down through the air duct, while Batgirl will come with me. We'll meet up in the middle."<br>He turned to Robin.  
>"remember: be careful. If it's too much for you or you feel unwell, get out immediately."<p>

Robin wanted to protest but Nightwing frowned at him.

"That is not a request, Robin. It's an order."

Robin sighed annoyed, but nodded eventually.

After synchronizing their frequencies to communicate, Nightwing and Batgirl left to enter the building from further down, while Robin made to climb into the air duct.

* * *

><p>Stupid Grayson, Robin thought as he crawled through the labyrinth.<p>

There was no reason to be treated like a child! Okay, maybe Damian Wayne liked to be taken care of…  
>only a bit of course, but Robin was capable of taking out multiple organisations over night, if he had to.<br>But no, Grayson obviously couldn't make out the difference between the two personas…

It was easy to realize that Nightwing had only sent him through here,  
>because that would slow Robin down and he wouldn't run into many enemies on the way down, while the others were fighting and probably joking their way up.<br>Robin tried to push the feeling of jealousy and disappointment back, the last thing he wanted was to screw up the whole mission because of his lack of concentration.

So, like the good boy he was, Robin kept crawling through the duct…  
>until he got fed up with it and decided to have some fun as well.<p>

His feet touched the ground without a sound and he easily cushioned the blow, staying in a low position, as he listened for any signs of enemies.  
>He was in some kind of storage room, but it was completely empty.<br>Strangely, he couldn't hear anything.  
>And that was something to be concerned over, because if Robin had learned one thing about Henchmen, it was that they were the noisiest kind of opponent ever…<br>Carefully, he made his way out of the room, and found himself in a big office.  
>Desks were scattered all over the room, as if they were hastily packed in here.<br>As Robin made his way through the room, scanning it for explosives, he felt himself preparing for battle.  
>It was subconsciously, but he felt his instincts kick in. something was terribly off here.<p>

Then he heard something.  
>At first he couldn't figure out what it was, but then he clearly heard the screams as they got louder.<br>From the sound of it, they came from the next lower floor.

Robin hurried to the door that led to the staircase and the elevator, but it was locked tightly.  
>He spied through the keyhole, and looked into darkness.<br>It was not as if there was no light on the other side, but the door was probably blocked.

He thought about going back to the air duct to climb down, when the door to the storage room was slammed open and Nightwing rushed in, followed by Batgirl.  
>Fortunately they were trained and managed to dodge the knives Robin had thrown.<p>

"Robin!" Nightwing hissed, shooting him a glare.

"Sorry" Robin muttered, weapons still raised, and one hand on his collapsible staff.

"Nightwing, there are people screaming from downstairs."

Nightwing nodded frowning, while he and Batgirl made to search the floor.

"Let me guess, the way up into that floor is blocked, they are heavily guarding the air duct entrance and now you want to get in from above?"

"Well, boy wonder" Batgirl said, throwing him a small explosive "If you already know that, why don't you make yourself useful and help?"

As they started planting the bombs, Robin turned to Nightwing.

"What happened to sneaky?"

"Went down the drain, the moment we realized that we have been expected. And not by Black Mask."

Surprised, Robin got up and studied the serious look on Nightwing's face. Even Batgirl was tensed up.

"Who?"

After finishing with his bombs, Nightwing walked over to Robin and gently tousled his hair.

"Robin, you should leave" he turned his head and smiled at Batgirl "As should you…"

"Nightwing!" they both protested.

"No, guys, I've already contacted Batman and Red Robin. You know who we're up against, Batgirl."

"Well I don't!" Robin hissed. He would have yelled, but didn't want to raise his voice.

"The Joker" Batgirl said, gritting her teeth.

"So? It's not like we haven't faced him before. Have you seen him?"

The grown ups exchanged a concerned look.

"I heard him, and he was raging. Robin, the last time I've seen the Joker out of control like this, terrible things happened.  
>He's keeping hostages and he knows damn well that we are here.<br>We cannot catch him off guard. And I know that you are better, but you are far from healed. So I want the two of you to leave."

During the whole conversation, Robin had tried to ignore the screams, but now they rose so high, that he couldn't keep himself from listening to them.

"Nightwing…"

Batgirl's voice was barely a whisper, and Robin saw that she herself was trying hard not to rush ahead.

"There are people getting hurt…"

"We will wait for Batman."

"I hate to admit it, but he's right." Robin said.

He was now fully concentrated and appeared a lot more mature than he usually was, as was to be expected from the heir to the league of assassins.

"When we play right into his hands, he'll kill us. He has no hesitation to kill anyone besides Batman.  
>The reason we haven't been attacked yet, was that he wants to lure Batman here. We have to wait and figure out a plan."<p>

Batgirl gaped at the two birds.

"What are you talking about? Can't you hear them screaming? They need help! Now!"

Nightwing raised his hand slowly in an attempt to calm her down.

"Bat…"

"No" she said, glaring at them

"I want to help people, that's what heroes are for! We protect the weak, not punish the bad, right?  
>And I know that is not how Batman sees things, but I do.<br>And I am going to go down there and help these people, follow me if you want to.  
>Don't, if you are too much of a coward."<p>

With that, she detonated her bomb and disappeared in the resulting smoke and dust.  
>The bombs they had planted weren't strong enough to destroy the whole floor, only to blast a hole into the floor, big enough for a person to jump through.<p>

"Damn it!" Nightwing cursed and detonated his own, disappearing as well.

Robin didn't waste time to detonate his, and simply jumped through Batgirl's, almost landing on her in the process.

* * *

><p>They were back to back, surrounded by Joker's henchmen who were coughing and rubbing their eyes, surprised by the dust.<p>

"Sneaky is never an option with you, girl blunder."

Batgirl laughed and charged towards a bulky guy, armed with a shotgun.  
>Robin decided to get to work as well. He ran through the dust and towards a croup of kneeling hostages.<br>As he ran, he heard gunshots, Batgirl's war cries and the buzz of Nightwing's electric batons, sizzling his enemies' skin.

Before he could reach the hostages, two of Joker's men cut him off, swinging bats at him.  
>Robin dodged easily, and jumped up, ramming his knee into the taller guy's face.<br>Bones breaking under his knee.  
>Using the guy's shoulder as a stepladder, he jumped even higher, kicking the now unconscious henchie down, while spinning around and hitting the other guy's throat with his foot.<br>The guy let out choking sounds as he stumbled over his friend and hit the ground.

Even though it was quite a brawl, Robin was concerned about one thing.  
>He constantly heard the nerve wrecking voice of the Joker, but never even saw a glimpse of the lunatic.<br>And it was not like the Joker not to show himself.

* * *

><p>Another two men hit the ground and would have taken down Nightwing with them, if he hadn't dodged them at the right moment.<br>It was going better than he had expected.  
>Batgirl was doing really good in a crowded fight and Robin was of course in the middle, taking down people as if he was raised to do it…<p>

Well he was.

Anyway, Nightwing though and smashed one of his batons into the knee of the guy behind him, hearing bones break.

The Joker's voice was everywhere, but he hadn't seen him yet.  
>He probably was somewhere watching from the distance.<br>Nightwing ignored the words and kept concentrating on taking down as many people as he could.

* * *

><p>"Stay down!" Batgirl yelled at the thug that was now facing the floor, buried by two others.<p>

For the moment she had the opportunity to catch her breath.  
>She quickly glanced around to see if Robin and Nightwing were okay.<p>

Nightwing was holding up extremely well, and he was smiling widely, probably not on purpose.  
>Robin on the other hand had an extremely serious look on his face different from his usual smug grin, and was just reaching the hostages.<p>

A bat that almost hit her, ripped Batgirl out of her thoughts and she jumped to the side, dodging another attack from above, kicking away the guys legs in the process.  
>While she concentrated on the three other guys closing in, she completely ignored the loud voice of the Joker that echoed through the room.<p>

* * *

><p>"Calm down" Robin called when he reached the hostages that kneeled on the floor, whimpering behind masks "I am here to…"<p>

He couldn't finish his sentence, when one of the hostages pulled out a gun and aimed at Robin.  
>It was only a split second, a moment of unawareness that caused Robin to simply stare at the pointed gun.<br>For the others, the gunshot must have sounded just like any other shot out of any other gun, but for Robin, it was the loudest and clearest shot he'd ever heard.  
>The impact in his side and the surprise ripped him off his feet and he hit the ground hard.<p>

Finally, it dawned upon him.

The Joker wasn't here, and this was simply a trap.  
>If they had waited for Batman, no one would have gotten hurt.<p>

"Sweet dreams little bird." One of the thugs yelled as they all aimed their guns at the boy lying on the floor.

Wait, Robin thought, the Joker wouldn't kill them like this.  
>Not in such a plain and boring way…<p>

He closed his eyes, preparing for the bullets to rip him apart.  
>He hoped that the others would notice it, not to save him, but to save themselves…<p>

And then the whole room exploded…

* * *

><p>Nightwing was just about to break the arm of one of the armed thugs, when the bomb exploded.<p>

It was completely unexpected, and if he hadn't been so far away he'd probably dead by now.  
>But as it was, he was only tossed against one of the great pillars, loosing consciousness immediately.<p>

All he could think of in those split seconds was Damian, hurt, dead…  
>He heard Batgirl screaming before he hit the pillar and the world faded to black.<p>

* * *

><p>When Robin opened his eyes, he was deaf and it was as if time was extremely slow.<br>He saw people being blasted out of the whole that had used to be a wall but he couldn't hear anything except for a constant bleep.  
>In his pained and yet strangely numb state, he didn't care that he was being thrown towards the hole at all.<br>Only when he saw a flicker of blonde, he awakened. He quickly grabbed the hand outstretched and time sped up again.  
>He was slammed against remains of the wall and used them to keep from sliding down and over the edge, where Batgirl was now dangling, body limp and eyes closed.<br>Part of her mask was ripped open and blood streamed into her face, staining her blonde hair red.

Robin tried to pull her back up, but his head was still spinning and the sound returned only slowly.

"Nightwing!" He yelled desperate for an answer, but there was none.

What if Grayson was among the corpses on the ground? Or the burnt ones in here?  
>The ground underneath him began to crumble and he slipped a bit, tearing his wound open even more.<p>

He had to pull her up, if not, she'd…

"You stupid fat chick!"

He'd never save her…

Robin cursed the tears that were running down his cheeks.

"Don't you dare fall! Just wake up!" he tried to pull her up again but failed.  
>"Please…" he whimpered.<p>

He had almost given up hope that she'd ever wake up again, when her eyelids began to flutter.

Quickly, Robin tried once again to pull her up, and to his surprise, that seemed to work on waking her up.

"Batgirl!" Robin panted, watching her eyes slowly focusing on him and widen in horror suddenly.

"Robin!" she yelled watching his pained face cringe.

"Don't…don't look down" he reminded her when she began turning her head.

He mustered all of his strength and made to pull her up, with her help this time.

"When we get out of here alive… loose some weight!" he cried out in pain, but too happy that she  
>was alive to keep from smiling a bit.<p>

"Shut up!" She laughed, but stopped when she realized that even with her awake and helping, they probably wouldn't be able to pull her up.

Robin was exhausted and blood was dripping from his hand.

"You are hurt…"

She didn't get more than a strained grunt out of Robin.

Her heart skipped a beat, the moment when she almost slipped out of Robin's grasp.

Without seeing his eyes, Batgirl knew that Damian's were probably widened in horror as well, and she noticed the tears that stained his face.

"B… you need to… to grab my arm. I have to let go…"

"Wait!"

"If I do, hold tight… I will pull you up."

Eventually, Batgirl nodded and she grabbed his arm with both hands, burying her nails in it.

She watched Robin taking a deep breath before he slid down towards the edge a bit.

"Robin! What are you doing?" she screamed, when his slide was stopped and she realized that he had let himself slide so far, so that he could brace himself on the remains of the wall with his feet.

He was now lying on his side awkwardly, his arm limb, and pulled her up.  
>As soon as the edge was in her reach, Batgirl pulled herself up as good as possible.<br>Laughing and crying a bit, she rolled on her back, closing her eyes.  
>When she opened them again, her heart stopped.<p>

In the corner of her eye, all she saw was a flicker of black and red slipping over the edge…  
>Without even thinking, she dove over the edge after Robin.<p>

* * *

><p>In the moment, when Damian had slipped, all he could think about was that at least Stephanie was safe.<br>He knew nothing about Dick's condition and he hoped that he was okay, but at least he had made sure that Stephanie survived.

He was just about to prepare to die for the second time this night, when suddenly arms were wrapped around him and he was pressed against a familiar body.  
>Blonde hair whipped his face and blue eyes looked into his…<p>

He wanted to yell at her but was interrupted when they were both shaken and ripped to the side.

Dick had caught both of them and shot a grapple hook to catch the blow, and now screamed in pain caused by the sudden rip in his arm.  
>The fall had not been completely stopped and the weight of three people must have been too much for whatever the hook had been attached to, because only moment after Dick had caught them, it broke free and they fell once again.<p>

Letting out a parade of very interesting curses, Dick turned midair, so that his back was facing the ground.  
>Stephanie screamed and pulled Damian even closer, and somewhere between that and the crash, Damian fainted.<p>

When Dick and the others crashed onto a car, Dick's Kevlar protected back left a huge bump on the roof, bending it in.  
>For a moment, all of them lay there, unconscious, until Damian woke up and quickly climbed down.<br>after sliding on his feet, he tried to walk some steps, but collapsed quickly.

Stephanie also climbed down carefully, and helped Dick, who was trying hard to catch his breath, into a sitting position.  
>The two grown ups smiled at each other, happy that all of them survived, but when they turned to Damian, expecting another smile, they were met with the furious eyes.<p>

Dick slid down the car with Steph.

"Dami, are you…"

"WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT FOR?" Damian yelled before they could come closer.

Damian sat there, shaking and furious.

"Robin" Stephanie whispered, remembering that they were still on the field.

"We… we just saved you."

"SHUT UP! I HATE YOU!" Damian's voice was husky and almost broke at the end.

"How could you?" he said, calmer but still agitated.

Dick wanted to get closer, but he had to be steadied by Stephanie to avoid collapsing.

"Robin… you would have died" he said between pants.

They reached Damian and knelt down in front of him, both looking concerned.

The young Robin had his cape wrapped around him and looked utterly shocked.  
>It was unusual for Damian to tremble and loose control like this…<br>Steph gently touched Damian's cheek but he flinched away immediately.

"Rob…"

"It wouldn't matter if I die!" he yelled again.

"What about you? Huh? The hook got loose… you could have died too!"

Dick sat back on his heels and smiled.

"We are all alive, right? So why are you so upset?"

"Because I…" the rest was spoken so quietly that the others couldn't understand it.

"What was that?" Steph asked, smiling encouragingly.

Damian looked up into their eyes and through the destroyed remains of the mask, blue eyes stared at them intently.

"Because I'd be all alone!" he yelled, clutching his cape.

It was too much for Damian…

The whole experience, almost dying two times and almost having lost Dick and Steph had gotten him exhausted to a point where he didn't care about the tears that now escaped or the shame he'd feel if the situation was different.

"When you are gone, I have nobody left! when I die you have Drake and Father and Pennyworth and so on! But I… "

Damian started trembling even harder.

"I don't want to be alone anymore."

When Damian's voice broke at the end, Dick couldn't hold back anymore and pulled Damian into his arms, while Stephanie stroked Damian's hair with one hand, while wiping away a stray tear with the other.

The boy in Dick's arms sobbed and gently plucked away Stephanie's hand, but he kept holding it tightly.

"We are still here" Dick whispered into Damian's ear, quiet enough for only them to hear.

"Damian, we won't just leave you like that. You won't ever be alone. Okay?"

Slowly, Damian calmed down and nodded eventually.

Dick turned to Stephanie.

"Would you mind calling Gordon and an ambulance? I will take care of hi… Wait" Dick noticed that Damian had suddenly gone limb in his arms

"Shit! Robin?"

"Nightwing! Look…" Stephanie pointed to the pool of blood that was collecting around Damian's knees.

"Fuck… Ambulance, now!"

But before Stephanie was even able to make a call, they heard sirens approaching.

"Nightwing, Batgirl."

They both turned around and met the ultimate bat-glare and a worried Red Robin.

"We'll take care from here on" Batman determined and picked up Damian gently, while Tim helped up Dick and Steph.

Dick was trying his hardest not to lose consciousness, fighting the drowsiness that washed over him in waves.  
>He heard Tim talking to him, but it sounded as if he was far away and then it all went black.<p>

* * *

><p>The moment Dick opened his eyes, he had only one thing on his mind: Is Damian okay?<br>Trying not to fall over again, he got out of the bed quickly and headed towards the door when his knees gave out and he crashed down.  
>Nausea washed over him and he almost threw up on the floor.<br>In his attempt of keeping himself from puking, he hadn't noticed that the door was opened and someone had stepped in.

"Grayson?"

Dick looked up and met the troubled eyes of Damian.

"Thank god" he sighed grabbed one of Damian's hands, pulling him down.

Damian tried to protest when Dick wrapped his arms around him, but didn't really put up much of a fight.

"Are you okay, Dami?"

Finally breaking free, Damian backed away and nodded.

"How's your head? Father said you'd have one hell of a concussion."

Dick turned his head left and right, but had to close his eyes when he felt his stomach revolting again.

"Yeah, I've been better."

The light tone in his voice caused Damian to smile softly, the concern disappearing from his features.  
>He got up and headed towards the door, but stopped and turned before leaving the room.<p>

"I'm going to inform father, but about last night…"

Damian nervously tugged at the sleeve of his hoodie, avoiding Dick's gaze.

"I don't want to talk about it and we should all forget about it, but still… thank you."

Dick smiled and leaned against the bed.

"Don't worry, Dami. I'll always be there to catch you."

The dream, Damian had experienced in his coma immediately popped up in his head.  
>Dick had caught him and after he finally woke up, he had told him the same thing… <p>

* * *

><p>After getting out of the room, Damian leaned against the frame for a moment, remembering the things that had happened after that incident.<p>

He and his father had gotten closer, even if only a bit, and he found out that maybe even Drake cared about him… and he about Drake.

Stephanie and Dick had both caught him when he needed them most, be it in a life threatening situation or when his world was about to collapse.

All of this had happened in the short time after he got injured and poisoned by the Riddler, maybe he should thank him, the next time he'd kick his butt.  
>He smiled at the thought and left to fetch his father.<p> 


	9. Ninth dream

**A/N: hey :) this is one of the chapters that are important to me, the scenes have been ghosting around in my head forever XD  
>but maybe i will rewrite the end as soon as i have some time. <strong>

**recommended song: sur le fil - yann tiersen(piano)  
><strong>

* * *

><p>Damian didn't bother to shield his eyes when the sun blinded him, merciless.<p>

How could the sun be shining anyway?

More and more people left the manor and eventually, only the closest of family were left.

Stephanie was still sitting next to Barbara, crying shamelessly.  
>He wanted to go over there and hold her, comfort her… do something.<br>But he couldn't.

He stood there, sun still shining and people still crying all around him.

And as he stood there, he realized how utterly alone he was.  
>He knew that he'd be welcomed with open arms if he'd approach one of the gathered people. But he didn't want to.<br>He wasn't crying, asking why or angry.  
>No, he didn't feel, and that was what made him lonely.<br>While the others would get their feelings out, he was cold and distant, not able to understand why the others were heart broken.

It was not like death was unusual.

It was everywhere and unavoidable, but as all of them knew, also reversible.  
>Eventually, he decided to seek out his father.<p>

The grass beneath his feet was green and not really fit for such an occasion.  
>Shouldn't it be dead too? The whole scenery should be dead and wasted, right?<p>

Slowly, Damian felt a bit of anger rise, feeling the injustice that was all around him.  
>After crossing the path to the manor garden, Damian came to a halt.<p>

He ripped open his eyes at the image he was seeing.

Quickly, he clenched them shut, covering his ears in an attempt to block out the desperate cries he heard.  
>As he turned and ran inside the house, he heard someone calling his name but he didn't listen.<br>He ran up the stairs and stormed into his room, locking the door, and hid in his bathroom.

The cries were gone.

The horrible images in his head that were playing over and over again vanished slowly as his breathing calmed down.  
>When he heard someone knocking on his door, calling for him, he turned on the shower.<br>Eventually they stopped, thinking that he was taking a shower.

Might as well, he thought, as he got out of his clothes and stepped under the hot water.

Maybe this could wash away the strange feeling of numbness that had been hunting him ever since that night.  
>But all that happened was that the image from the garden flashed back into his mind.<br>He tried to push it back, but he still heard his father cry, cry out as if he was in agony.

He saw the tears…  
>He had never seen his father cry.<p>

And Damian was sure, that it was unusual for men to cry, even if it was at a funeral.  
>Damian had never cried at a funeral, not that he had attended many until now, but he hadn't cried today either.<p>

It was as if the whole situation was a surreal dream and he'd wake up any minute, which was not entirely impossible.  
>He had had some strange dreams already.<p>

He got out of the shower and slipped into some comfortable clothes, deciding not to go down anymore.  
>Even if it was still way too early to go to bed, Damian fell asleep immediately as soon as he hit the soft mattress on his bed.<p>

* * *

><p>In his dreams, he saw Drake, caring for him, Stephanie caressing his scars, Colin laughing with him,<br>his father holding him in his strong arm, Jason and him eating cookies and Dick with his arms around a crying Damian, whispering into his ear.

As soon as Damian woke up, he realized that he had been crying.

Maybe everything that had happened had only been a dream.  
>He jumped off the bed and rushed out of the door, his naked feet hitting the floor as he ran down the hall towards the room he was deadly afraid of.<p>

He stopped in front of it and stared at the black ribbon that had been tied around the doorknob.

"No…" he whispered.

When he turned the knob, he realized that it was locked.  
>He kicked against the door, without enough strength to kick it out of the frame.<p>

Then again.

And again.

"Damian!"

Damian was pulled away from the door violently, his arms being crossed behind his back and held in place by a strong pair of hands.

"LET GO!" He yelled at his captor.

He turned to see Timothy Drake, teeth gritted, wearing his sleepwear.

"Damian stop it" he tried to sound calm, but failed miserably.

Tears were in his eyes and his voice broke at the end.

"I NEED TO SEE HIM!" Damian cried out, struggling to get free.

But Tim's grip was iron and he managed to pull Damian in an awkward hug.

"Stop it, please" he said, voice shaking.

"LET ME GO DRAKE! PLEASE!"

Tim let his head fall onto Damian's shoulder and the boy froze when he felt Tim starting to tremble and tears on his shoulder.

"Please… don't" Tim sobbed, holding Damian even tighter.

"Maybe it's a dream…" Damian said hoarsely.

"No" came a whisper "It's not a dream. I wish it was, I really do."

Even if Damian didn't want to believe it, tears were flowing over and running down his cheeks.

"Please?" he asked, voice fading.

Tim sobbed hard and gently pulled Damian's head against his shoulder, allowing the boy to dig his nails into Tim's ribs.

"Please…" Damian pleaded again.

None of them could tell for how long they sat there, cuddled up and crying in front of the door with the black ribbon, but eventually, Tim picked up Damian, who didn't even struggle, and carried him into Damian's room.  
>When he sat Damian down on his bed, the boy kept holding onto his shirt.<p>

"Damian" Tim cleared his hoarse throat "Please let go, you need to rest."

Damian looked up into Tim's eyes.

"Why?" he whispered, they were the same words his father had been crying out before.

"Why does it hurt?"

Tim sat down next to Damian, wiping away some tears, old and new ones.

"Because you loved him, we all did."

"Did?" Damian glared at Tim "Don't you anymore?"

"Of course we still do, and we always will. And that's why it hurts so bad."

Thoughtfully, Damian nodded and laid down, but when Tim wanted to leave, he grabbed his hand.

"Please don't leave me alone" Damian begged, ignoring the hurt pride that pouted inside.

Without a word, Tim laid down next to Damian and waited until Damian was asleep.

He wanted to get up, when Damian started mumbling in his sleep. Words at first, that became sentences eventually.

"I hate you, you promised that I wouldn't be alone anymore…"

After hearing that, Tim decided to stay with Damian for the night.

He rolled on his back and stared at the ceiling, another tear escaping.

"Dick, why did it have to be you?"

* * *

><p>Again, the sun was blinding Damian, but this time he had his eyes closed.<p>

He woke with a terrible fear in his guts.

Still in his sleepwear, he made his way downstairs, where Alfred was preparing breakfast and the sound of the TV could be heard from the living room.

Damian greeted Alfred quickly before entering the living room.

And when he saw who was sitting lazily on the couch, he felt like crying all over again.

He walked over to stand in front of the man.

"Morning, Dami…"

_SLAP__**!**_

"Ouch! What the hell was that for?" Dick asked, rubbing his cheek where Damian had slapped him.

"For being a stupid liar!" Damian said, frowning, before dropping on the couch next to Dick and leaning against him.

"Why?"

"Just, promise me. Don't die before me, okay?"

Dick was a bit confused, but held Damian close nonetheless.

"Dami, you know I can't…"

"Just. Promise. It"

Dick sighed and saw that Alfred, who was standing in the doorway, gave him a confused shrug.

"Okay, Dami, I promise."

Content with the answer, Dami got up and walked into the kitchen, ignoring the strange looks, both Alfred and Dick shot after him.

"What was that about?" Dick asked Alfred who once again shrugged.

"I think a bad dream, sir."

Dick nodded and sighed.

"Well, I hope he's alright."

"I think after seeing you, he was, sir."

Still confused, Dick shook his head.

"Well anyway, how about some breakfast?" he said smiling and got up, following Damian and Alfred into the kitchen.


	10. Tenth dream

**A/N: finally another chapter :D sorry for taking so long :)  
>Actually the chapter has been written long time ago, but my computer has been acting up, and i only got my new baby today, and i can finally upload again :D<strong>

**This was actually supposed to be a happy go lucky chapter, but somehow it turned out to be deep and personal again :/  
>BTW, please send me suggestions if you'd like :)<br>**

* * *

><p>"Grayson. When you said we'd spent the day together, since you are in Gotham today, I didn't expect something like this!"<p>

Dick, Tim and Damian had decided to spend the day, well, Dick had, and dragged them along.  
>And after going shopping and hanging out in Central Gotham, they were fairly hungry, so Dick had dragged the too into a McDonalds…<br>Tim, who didn't seem to mind, stood in line to order their food, while Dick and Damian waited at their table.

Annoyed, Damian tugged at his expensive Boss T-shirt and played with his watch, not liking the looks the other costumers kept shooting him.

Noticing Damian's uneasiness, Dick chuckled and plucked his shades out of his hair, just to put them on Damian who was now resting his head on his hand.  
>Damian didn't react and simply let Dick mess with his hair, and Dick had to admit, Damian looked extremely handsome and cool like this.<p>

"See, now you are incognito."

Not amused, Damian took the glasses off and threw them into Dick's face.  
>But instead of hitting his face, they were caught quickly by Dick.<p>

"Are you retarded?" he asked, sighing annoyed.

"Aw come on. By the way, I think you are the only kid that doesn't like McDonalds."

Damian frowned.

"I don't think that every other kid gets stared at like this."

Confused, Dick looked around.

"Oh, don't worry, they stare at me" he said, winking.

Damian faked a laugh and frowned instantly again.

Leaning forward a bit, he whispered to Dick.

"Seriously, these guys creep me out. Can't we eat somewhere else?"

And here he was again, Dick thought, the adorable little Damian.  
>Whenever they were in public like this, Damian felt uneasy among people, and that was exactly the reason why Dick dragged his little brother around.<br>He had to get over that socially awkward behaviour and learn how to deal with daily situations.

"Damian, you are a celebrity. I mean you are Bruce Wayne's son that just appeared out of nowhere.  
>And in case you didn't know, Bruce is doing all he can to keep you out of the spotlight."<p>

Damian leaned back, crossed his arms and huffed, looking away.

"Yeah, he's too embarrassed for his dysfunctional son…"

"That's not it at all, Dami. Bruce wants you to be safe. Imagine if he hadn't taken any measures, you'd be pestered all day.  
>The guys would stalk you and hunt you down to find out anything about you and then they'd drag you through the mud.<br>Bruce doesn't want that for you.  
>He didn't for any of us.<br>But you are his biological son, so they are even keener on getting to you."

Almost unnoticeable, Damian smiled, just when Tim came back, carrying two trays full of wrapped up food.

"Food, boys" he said cheerful.

Dick scooted over and Tim sat down, handing Dick his burger and fries, while Damian stared at his tray in disbelief.

"What is this?" he asked, tugging at the colourful cardboard thingy on his table.

Dick looked up, his mouth still full with fries.

"A happy meal" Tim said, looking at Dick, a bit unsure "Dick told me you want one."

When Damian gripped the table and shot Dick a deadly glare, Dick burst into laughter and almost choked on his fries.  
>Trying to prevent his brother from choking, Tim slapped Dick's back.<p>

"I cannot eat this!" Damian hissed, looking at the contents of the box, picking out a toy, wrapped in plastic.

"Is that a" he looked at the wrapping "Barbie?"

Dick, still fighting to choke, cried out and slammed his head on the table,  
>shaking and laughing and coughing while Tim both, gently rubbed Dick's back and tried to hold down the fuming Damian.<p>

"Guys" he hissed "calm down" but even he had to fight back a chuckle, seeing Damian getting this upset.

After a while, Dick's throat was finally free and he sighed, sitting up again, still shaking a bit.

"Sorry Dami" cough "But that was hilarious."

"There is nothing funny about it!" Damian said, upset and frowning.

Tim settled back as well and started to eat his chicken nuggets.

"I am sorry Damian, but at least eat the something."

Violently, Damian shoved the tray away.

"I am not hungry anymore."

He looked around and saw the people still staring at him, and shame crept up his neck and he blushed.

"In fact I'm leaving" he said, not waiting for a reaction and slid out of the bench, heading towards the exit quickly.

"Dami!" Dick called after him, and gave Tim an urging push, gesturing him to let him out.

He hurried after Damian, leaving a confused Tim behind.  
>Uncomfortable, Tim sipped at his coke, feeling the eyes of the crowd resting on him and he blushed slightly.<br>Just to keep his fingers occupied, he pulled out his phone and started scrolling through Facebook, inwardly cursing at the others and these stupid gazers…

Damian walked over down the avenue, feeling again, all eyes on him. some people were even bold enough to point at him, and he heard their voice loud and clear.

"Hey, isn't that…"

"Wayne's son…"

"His mother's still unknown…"

"Maybe she was just another toy…"

Damian clenched his eyes shut and hurried on, trying to ignore them, when suddenly, he heard tires screeching and an arm around his waist pulled him back.  
>Gasping, Damian snapped his eyes open and turned around to meet Dick's eyes, full of horror.<p>

"Dami…"

Dick gently dragged Damian off to the side, shielding Damian from the crowd that had gathered rather quickly.

"Grayson I'm fine, I – "

" – no you are not" Dick interrupted.

"You almost got hit by a car! What were you thinking?"

"I… I just got upset" Damian said, low enough for only Dick to hear, and glared at the bystanders.

"Upset? Well about a stupid joke and a toy?"

Dick sighed and looked around.

"We are going home"

Before Damian could protest, Dick cut him off.

"Now."

* * *

><p>Bach at the mansion, Dick dragged Damian into the living room and sat him down on the couch, while he kept standing.<p>

"Guys"

They both snapped their heads to the side, seeing Tim in the doorway.

"I'm going downstairs, so if you need any…" he looked at them, both were upset and agitated, they had been the whole drive home.

"Never mind, I'm gone."

Dick looked back at Damian and met his glare.

"What do you want?" Damian asked, arms crossed and looking stubborn.

"We need to talk about your behaviour back there."

Damian stood up and held out his hands.

"What did I do wrong? I was angry. Instead of punching you in the face, or slaughtering those fucking vultures, I walked it off!"

"You almost got hit by a car." Dick answered, trying to keep his voice down.

"So what? We risk our lives all the time! Why are you so upset about it!"

"First of all, it always scares the shit out of me, whenever I see you in danger, so don't tell me to be calm about it!" Dick yelled, silencing Damian immediately.

Embarrassed, Damian looked down at his feet, clenching his fists.

"And second… I am not upset, I am…" he sat down on the coffee table and sighed "I think I am frustrated…"

Oh, damn he thought instantly, wrong choice of words.

He saw it in Damian's eyes, the boy had shut down.  
>Still standing, Damian had distanced himself, probably thinking that Dick wanted to abandon him, tired of trying to make him a better "human".<br>But that was not it… at least not this way.  
>It was true, Dick was tired of always keeping an eye on Damian and being so careful around the boy, but it was not because Damian's strange ways annoyed him.<br>But the fact that Damian was only able to live a half life made him sad.  
>Damian would always be batman's son, and not Bruce Wayne's. he was great on the battlefield but totally clumsy when it came to anything social.<br>And for as long as Damian didn't get the hang of that, he would never be able to have a relationship, or simply friends outside of the costumed community.

"Damian, that came out wrong, I'm sorry. I just, I wish that you could ditch being Robin for a moment and be you.  
>Damian Wayne, the person, not the mask, you know?"<p>

Damian laughed coldly and looked away.

"Well that is not possible I am afraid."

Dick got up again and gently squeezed Damian's shoulder.

"Dami, why would you say that? I know – "

"Because!" Damian yelled and shook off the hand, staring into Dick's eyes.

"Because there is no other me!"

"Dami…"

Damian backed away and held out his hand, showing his palm with its scars and blisters.

"There is no Damian Wayne that puts on a Costume and becomes Robin! There is a killer that puts on the Costume of Damian Wayne!  
>Because I was born and raised and trained to be a killer! And a killer doesn't need emotions!<br>Doesn't need to know how to interact with people!  
>I just need to know how I can either kill a person swiftly and without a trace, or slowly and painful!"<p>

"There is more to you Damian…"

"Is there? Really? Because I know how people look at me!  
>And after all the changes I have made, all the things I try to learn and live by, they still look at me as if I'd enjoy to kill their children, grinning while I do so!<br>Do you want to know why I got so upset?  
>Because I don't know what to do anymore!<br>I… I want to be good and normal!  
>Do you think I actually enjoy, existing at the border of humanity? Not understanding half of the emotions people around me experience?<br>When you guys laugh, I don't get it! When you talk about love, I don't understand it! When you feel sad because of a fallen comrade, I wonder why!"

Dick stared at Damian, not able to come up with something comforting or suitable to say, to calm the boy down.

"Do you want to hear something terrible?" Damian asked, smiling sadly.

"Most of the time, I measure the 'love' I feel for other people, at the amount of negotiation I'd need to kill them…"

Suddenly, the boy's lip started to quiver and Dick saw him holding back tears.

"I don't know why! I can't help it! But I do!  
>I don't think: 'hey, I like you, so I'll let you in on a secret' and feel all fuzzy about it!<br>I think ' hey, I think I'd be hard to kill you, but I'd do it anyway!'"

"Would you kill me?" Dick asked, voice calm and face guarded.

Confused, Damian stared at Dick, thinking for a moment.

"No"

"So you like me, according to your logic? Is that the only reason you like me?"

"No, you are nice and… why are you asking me this?" Damian's voice was shaking and desperate.

"Because that means that you don't like me because you couldn't kill me, but because you feel affection, just like any other person on this planet."

"I… no! I don't feel!" he cried out, backing away some more, but Dick followed his steps, pulling Damian into his arms and rested his head on Damian's.

Some months ago, Damian would have tried to strangle him already,  
>but a lot had happened and over time, Damian had gotten used to being so close to Dick, and simply endured, and maybe even enjoyed it.<p>

"Oh, you do. And I think there's the problem. You feel but you don't know how to handle it…"

"I can handle anything!" Damian protested, sobbing softly into Dick's chest.

"Yeah, of course. Look Damian, I understand that it's hard for you to fit in, and I said some stupid stuff,  
>but saying that there is no Damian Wayne, only a killer in costume is bullshit.<br>Let me tell you a story about a guy I know."

Damian mumbled something but Dick ignored it.

"There's this guy, he has lots of friends actually, even a pretty lady, whom I personally think he has a major crush on and a kick ass mentor.  
>He has some issues, mostly issues when it comes to bonds.<br>It takes him some time to actually warm up to someone, but when he does, he gets extremely clingy, you know like really clingy.  
>And there are some people who don't like that, but if you'd push him away, you'd break his heart and he'd get very upset.<br>Now this guy, he thinks he is pretty much alone with a responsibility, after seeing people die and going through a lot.  
>So he secludes himself, or tries to, because every time he does, one of his friends or family keeps pulling him back, telling him that he is not alone and that he is very, very loved."<p>

Dick leaned back a bit, looking at the boy in his arms.

"Now do you think that this guy doesn't have feelings? Do you think he is a soulless puppet?"

"No, but even if that's true, you left out the killing part."

"Why?"

Damian sniffed.

"I – "

"- Who said I was talking about you?" Dick asked smiling.

Confused, Damian blinked.

"See, I was talking about me, when I was younger."

"But…"

"We are pretty alike, aside from the upbringing, but everyone goes through phases like that.  
>You just aren't that experienced in handling such outbursts, but you'll learn, like I have.<br>All I am saying is, I know a Damian that is funny, loving and very, very insecure sometimes.  
>He is also protective and grateful as soon as he likes you."<p>

"Who said that I like you?"

"You did." Dick smiled, and frowned instantly again "You do, right?"

Daman blushed and buried his face in Dick's chest, but nodded eventually, making Dick smile.  
>After ruffling Damian's hair, Dick released him and chuckled.<p>

"But about the girl friend crush…"

He gasped, when Damian punched him in the ribs.

"Shut up."

"Ouch… anyway, Dami, how about we try and go to Burger King tomorrow?  
>No children menu, I swear" Dick asked, crossing his heart with his finger.<p>

"What for?"

"So I can tell you how to get that crush to date you – UFF!"

Dick buckled over, when Damian punched him in his stomach before stalking off.

"I have no crush."

Wheezing, Dick straightened up and sighed.

"Yeah, not at all."

* * *

><p>Up in his room, after a shower, Damian changed into a big and baggy T-shirt and pyjama pants.<br>He settled on his bed, and tried to fall asleep, but thoughts kept him awake and he somehow couldn't find a comfortable position to sleep.

"Titus" he whispered, waiting for a sign.

Rustling could be heard and soon, the great dane's head appeared next to Damian, resting on the bed. Rolling on his side, Damian petted the dog.

"Titus, do you think I can learn to be normal? You know, maybe go to school and be like father some day, I mean Bruce Wayne?"

The dog grumbled and made a whining noise.

"You don't know?"

Damian sighed.

"I don't know either…"

Frowning he shook his head.

"This is silly, you don't understand me… but still, by Grayson's definition, I think I like you a lot. Do you like me?"

For a moment, Damian and Titus stared into each other's eyes, when Titus leaned up and started licking Damian's face.

"Bwah!"

Disgusted, but gentle, he pushed Titus away, wiping the drool away with his arm.

"Titus, don't do that again!"

The dog yelped and laid his head on the bed again, sitting down.

Smiling, Damian stroked the soft fur of his head.

"So you do like me…"

Immediately, the dog shot up again, but Damian stopped him, holding up a finger.

"Don't, Titus. It's okay, I know."

Panting, it looked almost as if Titus was smiling.

"Good boy" Damian said, before rolling on his back again, and slowly fell asleep.

* * *

><p>The next day, Dick had managed to talk Damian into going to a Burger King with him.<p>

They sat in one of the more secluded corners and ate quietly, though Damian still kept glaring at the people who dared to look at him.

Smiling, Dick noticed that Damian had managed to relax a bit, slowly eating his fries and chatting almost normally, about his dog and other stuff.  
>But after a while, Damian ran out of conversation material and continued to eat in silence, listening to Dick's stories.<br>It was really comfortable, Damian admitted to himself, sitting there with Grayson, no pressure and only little distraction, when suddenly music started to blast out of the speakers.

Startled and instantly alarmed, Damian jumped to his feet, but Dick held him down with one arm, pressing him back onto the bench.

"Dami, calm down."

Children and adults started joining the song, gathering around one table where an employee was about to set down a plate with a special menu.

"What's going on?" Damian asked, leaning sideways, to see the whole spectacle.

Dick chuckled and took a sip from his large cup filled with water.

"It's a birthday party."

Only hesitantly, Damian sat back, eyes still focused in that direction, before looking at Dick with a confused expression on his face.

"Birthday?"

At first, Dick thought that Damian was joking, and chuckled, but when the expression didn't change, he set down the cup.

"Wait, you don't know what a birthday is?" he asked, completely baffled.

"Of course I do. It's the day you were born, but why are they celebrating?"

"Have you never had a party on your birthday?"

Damian thought about it for a moment, and focused back on Dick.

"Well, once, on my eight birthday, but that wasn't because we were celebrating my birthday. It was because I met my mother for the first time…"

He glanced sideways, as if he wasn't sure about it.

"I guess."

Dick leaned back, not exactly sure what to think. Damian had never really celebrated a birthday? Wait, when was his birthday anyway?"

"When is your birthday? You never told us…"

Damian shrugged.

"I don't exactly know when I was "born". But I always counted my age like I count the years; it ends at the last day of December."

Holy crap, Dick thought, Talia had never even given Damian a birth date? And Sylvester was a poor and lazy way to solve it…

"But you were born someday, you can't just choose your birthday."

"Father never told you, did he?" Damian asked, smiling bitter.

"Never told me what?"

Damian sighed and gently pushed away the tray, filled with wrappings.

"My mother didn't actually give birth to me. I grew and well, was nurtured inside of an artificial womb of sorts.  
>As soon as I was old enough to live like any other baby, I was released and given into the care of my maid.<br>But no one besides my mother and my maid know what day that was.  
>And well, since my mother denies her maternity and my maid is dead, I don't think I'll ever find out."<p>

The whole time, Dick had listened, he had kept a blank face, but inside he felt shocked.  
>How could a woman be so cruel to her only son? Damian had been nothing but an experiment and a tool to get close to Batman…<p>

"Damian…I" he started, thinking of words of comfort, but Damian smiled at him, unusually calm.

"It's no problem, Grayson. I never cared about it."

Carefully, Dick studied Damian's face, but eventually he sighed and got up.

"I'll go get dessert, do you want something?"

Damian shook his head and watched Dick heading towards the counter.

He heard the children at the table with the birthday child laugh and giggle happily.  
>They played with toys and started to chase each other around the tables, even passing his one time, and something inside of him longed to be one of them.<p>

Inside his head, he wondered what he would have been like, if he had lived with his father and Grayson his whole life.

He'd probably be still a bit arrogant, but a lot more open and half as paranoid.  
>Of course he'd also have the ability to cope with social interactions easily; maybe he'd even attend a normal school…<p>

"Dami?"

Startled, Damian looked up to see Dick waving his hand in front of his face, holding a muffin in the other.

"You okay?"

"Can we go home?" Damian asked, and Dick frowned upon hearing the urgency in the boy's voice.

"Yeah, no problem, but why?"

Gathering their trays, Damian got up and headed towards the exit without answering.  
>Dick followed and nibbled at his muffin on the way, wondering what was wrong now.<p>

Without a word, they got to one of Bruce's cars, standing in the parking lot, and Damian waited for Dick to unlock it before climbing in quickly.

"Look Dami, if you'd just – "

"- Can we…" Damian cut him off

"Can we celebrate my birthday this year?" he asked, too embarrassed to look into Dick's eyes.

"I mean at I don't know…"

"How about 5th January?"

Damian looked up, a puzzled look on his face.

"Why that?"

"I don't know, I just like it. And of course we can."

Damian smiled sheepishly and looked out of the window, while Dick started the engine and backed out of the parking space.

"But I'll get to choose the guests"

"Of course."

"And Drake won't be invited."

"Of course he will" Dick answered, smiling patiently.

"And I want to go patrolling then"

"With you" he added.

"No problem"

"And I want to eat jellyfish"

Dick turned to look at him, a disgusted look on his face.

"What?"

Damian shrugged.

"It's delicious."

* * *

><p><strong>AN and yes, jellyfish is delicious ;)**


	11. Eleventh dream

**A/N: sooooo finally a new chapter :S**

**i am so sorry for taking so long, i was busy with finals and i started two other multi-chapter fics and had to get started on them.  
>But now i have finally found the time and motivation to continue.<br>This time though, the chapter will be in two parts.  
>I hope the second part won't take as long to write XD<br>**

**i want to credit DeathwishJV who always posts reviews and inspired me to write this setting :)  
><strong>

**enjoy and again sorry for the tardiness :)  
><strong>

* * *

><p>"NO!" Tim and Damian shouted in union.<p>

"Why not?" Dick asked, sighing and shot Bruce a desperate look.

But instead of jumping in and support Dick, Bruce watched the three of them, an amused smile on his lips.  
>They had been discussing like this for half an hour.<br>Thirty minutes of trying to convince Damian and Timothy to get along for a whole week…

"Because – " the two started together, but stopped immediately to glare at each other.

"I don't want to be stuck with Drake for a week! In Greece on top of that! What is so great about Greece?" Damian yelled, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

Wow, Bruce thought, somehow Damian managed to look down on people while staring up at them challenging.  
>But maybe it was time to step in…<p>

"Guys…"

"You think I'd want to be stuck with you?" Tim yelled back, interrupting and completely ignoring Bruce.

"You bicker and annoy us the whole time! As if I'd want to spent any more time with you than necessary! Bruce!"

Tim turned to Bruce and held out his hand, pointing at Damian.

"Can't we just leave him here? I mean Alfred could take care of him…"

"I can take care of myself!" Damian hissed and made to leave the room, but was held back by Dick.

"Dami, wai – " he stopped when he saw Damian change his grip.  
>Before he could say any more, he felt Damian's heel crashing into his stomach and his back suddenly made contact with the coffee table, smashing it to pieces.<p>

"Damian!" Bruce growled after the boy, but he was already up the stairs.

Tim carefully helped Dick up, who just shook off remains of the table and stared into the hallway Damian had disappeared into.

"He just… why did he do that?"

"Demonstration I guess" Timothy said snickering, "And I am telling you, one week in a rented house with him will be just like this, constantly."

"No" Dick said, shaking his head thoughtfully. "He's upset over something."

"Or maybe his cuddly and nice phase is simply over? He just returned to normal asshole Damian after being this strange emotional mess all the time."

"He was no emotional mess, Tim." Dick answered, angrily.

"He wasn't? I mean he cried in front of me for god's sake. Something had to be wrong.  
>It's this stupid poison. So why can't we just leave him here and enjoy the Greek beach without him? I'm sure he'll be fine."<p>

"We won't leave him here, because of the poison.  
>He could have another huge fit every minute, so we won't leave him alone, and that's final" Bruce intervened, silencing the other two.<p>

"I will go talk to him. Tim, Dick, help Alfred clean this up, please."

Without another word, Bruce turned around left, while Dick and Tim stared at his broad back, both majorly annoyed.  
>Together, they started picking up the smashed table.<br>After a while, Tim noticed that Dick kept shooting glances at the hallway and he dropped his wood on a pile, and leaned against an armchair.

"What are you upset about? The demon is allowed to come, you should be happy."

Sighing, Dick got up and shot one last glance towards the still quiet and empty hallway.

"Look Tim. To be honest, I think vacation without Damian would be a lot more relaxing, I won't argue about that, but he is family.  
>You need to accept that as much as he does. I thought after your incident with him, you two would get along better.<br>But lately he has been so cold and angry again. And the worst thing is, he won't tell me why…"

"Is that what you are upset about? That Bruce went up instead of you and hasn't come down yet? Are you… are you jealous, Dick?"

"No – " Dick answered, sitting down on the couch "I mean, I don't know actually. Maybe."

"Dick, Bruce is his father, not you. I know you two bonded and stuff, but – "

" – We didn't simply bond. Did you know he called me 'his' batman once? He's not really a brother to me Tim…"

After a minute of thoughtful silence, Tim ripped open his eyes and stared at Dick.

"Y-you don't… I mean I know you swing both ways, but he…"

"Tim!" Dick exclaimed, his face convulsing  
>"NO! I didn't mean that! He is more of a son to me than a brother, geez, get your mind out of the gutter Timothy!"<p>

Tim let out a shaky sigh and smiled embarrassed.

"Sorry, it was just… It sounded a little strange."

* * *

><p>Upstairs, Bruce was standing in front of closed doors, knocking for the umpteenth time.<p>

"Grayson! I don't want – "

" – It's me Damian. Your father."

There was a short silence before he heard a key being turned in the lock, and Damian swung the door open slowly.

"Excuse me father. what is it?"

Bruce tried to smile encouragingly.

"Can I come in? I want to talk."

Nodding, Damian stepped aside.

"It's a bit of a mess right now, but okay."

Surprised, Bruce entered the room and stopped in the middle of the room, taking in the 'mess' Damian had meant.  
>If Dick had ever made a mess like this, Bruce and Alfred would have had a lot less trouble with the boy.<br>The room was completely tidy and everything seemed to be in place.

"I see no mess, Damian."

"The bed is not made, Father, and I haven't put back my Eskrima sticks…"

Chuckling, Bruce made his way to Damian's study, picking up one of the red and black sticks.

"That is no mess Damian. By the way, I didn't know you trained with the Eskrima, is Dick teaching you?"

"I know how to use them ever since I was six, father. But yes, Grayson is showing me how to use them in the field. I… I made those myself."

Bruce whistled in approval and turned to his son.

"Damian, you know why I am here, right?"

Nodding slowly, Damian sat down on his bed and focused on his father.

"Because I used Grayson's back to smash a table, yes I know why."

Bruce waited for his son to continue, but nothing came. They only stared at each other.

"And? Why did you do it?"

Instantly, almost mechanically, Damian answered.

"He held me back, and I demonstrated that I need no baby-sitter. I don't want to come along, father, why force me?"

Sighing, Bruce walked over to Damian and gently ruffled the boy's hair.

"Look, Damian, we can't leave you here alone. Not only because you are still a minor.  
>I have no doubt that you can defend yourself, but still you haven't completely recovered despite the fact that the fits have lessened, they still happen.<br>But what really concerns me, and all of the others as well, is your recent behaviour.  
>You distanced yourself, only joining us for dinner occasionally and you haven't talked to any of us.<br>Not even during patrol. Damian, what happened?"

Carefully, he studied his son's face for any answers. He looked tired, pale and on edge.

"Damian..."

"If I come along and try to behave, will you not ask me anymore?"

For a moment, Bruce considered pressing the matter, but this was the best Damian would offer.

"Deal, but, you will have to tell someone about it, understood?"

"Fa – "

"I will only drop the matter if you are willing to talk to someone about it, anyone at all."

It took a while, but eventually, Damian nodded.  
>A bit happier, Bruce brushed his fingers through Damian's hair before leaving the boy alone.<p>

"We will leave tomorrow evening, so if you have anything you need to settle, do it now."

"Yes, Father."

* * *

><p>Oh god, Damian sighed inwardly and turned his head to look at the body that was slumped against him.<br>Red hair tickled his neck and he felt the constant urge to get the other boy off him, but by doing that, he risked waking all of the others that were fast asleep in the plane.  
>Meaning, they would wake up instantly, bat-senses.<p>

Alfred was flying the jet, while Tim, Dick and Bruce were sleeping in their seats.  
>He never should have invited Colin to come along…<p>

"Wilkes" Damian whispered, gently nudging the other boy and pushing him away a bit.

Suddenly the boy shifted and groaned, wrapping his arms around Damian's waist in his sleep.

"God damn it! Stop that!" Damian almost shrieked and tried to pluck the boy's arms away.

From across the plane, Damian heard a chuckle and he saw Tim grinning at him, wriggling his eyebrows.  
>Oh how he wished to rip that smile off of that damn face right now…<p>

Not wanting to give Drake the satisfaction by loosing control, Damian simply kept staring outside,  
>plugging in his ear buds and turned on his iPod, but not without flipping Drake the bird first.<p>

* * *

><p>It was around noon when they finally arrived at the designated place. A mansion owned by the Wayne's in Halhidiki, Greece.<br>The weather was beautiful.  
>Blue sky with no cloud in sight, a nice breeze cooling the hot temperature and the Mansion was directly sat at the seaside,<br>allowing a wonderful view to the ocean.  
>Like any bigger Mansion in Greece, it was surrounded by a strong fence, keeping dogs and intruders out.<p>

Bruce helped Alfred carry their luggage inside, while Collin dragged Damian towards the door in the fence that lead to the beach.

"Damian, look! We can simply walk to the beach!"

Slightly less annoyed, Damian shielded his eyes from the sun and sighed.

"Yeah, I can see that."

"I've never been to the sea!" Colin said, laughing and taking in the air.

"It smells so nice."

Smiling softly, Damian kept silent, only agreeing on the inside, and closed his eyes.  
>He had always loved the sea and was somehow happy to see it again like this.<br>Back when he had been younger, his maid would sometimes take him to the beach and build sandcastles, always careful to avoid the landmines his mother had planted.

Strangely, Damian was rather fond of a specific memory, where he and Salia had discovered one of the mines and, under the horrified eyes of his maid, had diffused the mine… at the age of seven.

He would taunt her and play with the deadly tool as if it was merely a toy, knowing damn well that it could have ripped them both to pieces, but back then, his mind would sometimes be childish and unreasonable.  
>It had been okay, as long as he and his maid had been alone.<p>

"Damian?"

Damian turned his head and met Colin's worried eyes.

"Are you okay?"

Smiling, Damian nodded and turned around.

"We should bring our stuff into our rooms."

"Rooms?" Colin asked and followed Damian.

"Aren't we sleeping in the same room?"

Damian chuckled.

"Why would we do that?"

"I don't know, I just thought…"

The disappointment in Colin's voice startled Damian a bit and he stopped, just in front of the Mansion, seeing their bags through the open door.

"Would you rather stay in one room?"

Colin shrugged, obviously a bit embarrassed.

"It's just… I thought we would, play together, you know? Build a fort… tell each other horror stories and stuff."

Genuinely interested, but just as confused by the proposition, Damian tipped his chin.

"We could of course build a fort, why is beyond me, but it sounds… pleasurable I think. But I think telling each other horror stories is no good idea."

"Why not? I can take it" Colin said challenging.

"Because, Wilkes, you almost lost control over your bladder when you were stuck in a dark room."

Colin flinched at the memory and waved it off.

"Okay, so no horror stories… but we will build a fort?"

Hesitantly, Damian nodded.

"As I just said, I don't know why, but I am sure if we ask father he could provide us with the necessary tools and materials."

Suddenly, Colin burst into laughter and playfully slapped Damian's shoulder.

"We are not really going to build a fort… just one with mattresses and pillows and stuff. That's what it's all about!"

"But that wouldn't be a real fort" Damian mumbled, slightly upset over the humiliation he felt.

Colin smiled widely and made a gesture that looked like an arc.

"It's about imagining it!"

Giving him a look as if he had lost his mind, Damian nodded again and decided to drop the topic, heading inside.

* * *

><p>The next day, the whole group decided to hit the beach.<br>Of course, as soon as they reached the relatively deserted, private beach, all eyes of the other rich visitors rested on them.  
>While Tim tried to ignore the looks and hurried to a nice place a bit further away from a group of shrieking teenagers,<br>Dick bathed in the attention he was given, granting certain beauties a dashing smile or a nice display from behind.

Bruce, always the gentleman, greeted some of his acquaintances and did some small talk before joining Tim under a big umbrella.  
>Colin practically sprinted to the ocean, throwing himself into the waves and Damian…<br>Damian didn't really know what to do or where to go.  
>He had decided to sunbathe and swim a bit, maybe playing some volleyball, but he had expected to be completely alone here.<br>Whenever he had visited his own Island, a gift from his mother, he had been alone and unsupervised, not constantly being watched by curious eyes…  
>Of course, these people weren't paparazzi, but still, everyone was curious about Bruce Wayne's biological son.<p>

Maybe, he could join Grayson, who was just now flirting with a busty redhead… or not.

Joining his father was no option because Drake had already claimed that spot,  
>so all that remained was joining Colin who was swimming and laughing like a little child.<p>

Damian sighed, but decided to do that.  
>After he had dropped his bag with clothes, books and his iPod, Damian strolled over to the water.<p>

"Damian!" Colin called from afar, waving his hands and keeping himself over water only with his legs.

Flinching when his toes touched the cold water, Damian slowly walked towards Colin until it reached up to his navel.  
>For a moment he remained like this, tuning out Colin's calling and the sound of the other people,<br>simply listening to the waves and the wind, feeling the water cooling his skin and gently swaying him.  
>An almost invisible smile appeared on his lips before he dove into the water and pushed himself off the ground.<br>When he opened his eyes, he had to get used to the light stinging first.  
>The water was unusually clear and as he swam further away from the beach, he began to see sea-urchins and the occasional fish.<br>He swam until he ran out of air and shot out of the water.

Strangely, he was pretty far away from the beach…  
>When he looked around, he saw Colin swimming towards him.<br>Damian decided to make it easier for the boy and swam his way.

"Wow!" Colin said, eyes wide in surprise.

"I didn't know one could dive so long! How do you do that? is it some kind of breathing technique?"

Sighing, Damian eyed him sceptically.

"I can't breathe underwater Colin, so no, it's not a breathing technique."

"Then how did you do it?"

Damian shrugged and motioned to swim back, seeing that Colin began to tire a bit.

"I just can hold my breath this long, probably one of my mother's goodies."

"Goodies?" Colin asked, slightly behind Damian as they swam back into the land.

"It's my third pair of lungs. Screwed up two already and I think she enhanced this one somehow."

As if to signalize that he understood, while he didn't at all, Colin nodded and decided not to ask any more.  
>Together they swam back, Damian occasionally diving down into the water, when he suddenly turned around and stopped Colin.<p>

"What – "

" – There's a cave there. Or at least an entrance" Damian said, pointing to his left.

"Let's go in there, I want to see it."

Colin wanted to protest, but Damian was already gone.  
>Sighing, he decided to check it out as well, and really, there was an entrance into the cliff the was next to the beach.<br>Colin swam until he was directly in front of it, waiting for Damian to return, not risking to follow him and die in the process.  
>He knew that Damian would be okay on his own, but he was gifted, or cursed, with a biologically enhanced body, while Colin was just a boy as long as he wasn't Abuse.<p>

After a while, Damian appeared again and pulled Colin down by the hand.  
>Together this time, they swam through the entrance and a narrow tunnel.<br>The time it took them to reach the first little cave where they could catch some air wasn't long,  
>but Damian held Colin back from diving under and handed him a little mouthpiece.<p>

"What's this?"

"Oxygen. The next part is too long for you without any source of Oxygen, just breathe normally and you'll be fine. Also – "

A little flashlight was shoved into Colin's hands.

"Take this, you won't see anything otherwise."

A bit surprised, Colin eyed the items in his hand.

"Damian, why would you take this stuff along?"

The other boy shrugged and gave him a serious look.

"Always be prepared, that's what both my parents kept teaching me. I won't need them."

"You have enhanced night vision too?" Colin asked, amazed.

"No, just a lot of training in dark places, I can find my way just fine, and I only have one flashlight, if you get lost, you will need it."

Now, Colin was a bit unsure whether this had been a good idea and clutched the flashlight.  
>Being alone in a dark room, stuck in a tunnel under water… there were better ways to spend your time.<p>

But eventually he nodded and watched Damian sink into the water.  
>He followed after him, putting the mouthpiece in and bit on the little capsule, which would allow him to breathe, while he turned on the flashlight.<p>

Damian had been right, the tunnel was rather long and when they reached a huge cave, Damian was breathing heavily, while Colin climbed out of the water next to him.

"Are you okay?" he asked, hesitantly touching his shoulder.

Damian nodded, eyes clenched shut.  
>After he had recovered, Damian gestured Colin to look around.<p>

And now Colin was convinced that it had been a good idea.  
>He turned off the flashlight.<br>The cave was huge and everywhere stones were shining brightly, they hung from the ceiling, grew along the wall or simply stood on the ground, illumination the great room.

Colin saw that there was a tunnel that led in further, but for today, he had enough adventuring.

"It's beautiful!"

Damian nodded, smiling.

For a moment, the two of them simply sat there, enjoying the view and the atmosphere, listening to the sounds of the ocean being thrown back by the walls.  
>But when Colin turned his head to look at Damian, he immediately grew worried.<br>The other boy was pale and his eyes almost completely closed, but Colin saw that he was trying to keep them open.

"Damian" Colin broke the silence.

Damian didn't react, but brought a hand to his head and held it to his forehead.

"Damian what's wrong?" the worried boy asked, placing a hand on Damian's arm.

Groaning, Damian dug his nails into his skin, straining to keep his eyes open.

"Dami – "

" – I don't!" Damian hissed through clenched teeth.

"I don't want to go to sleep…"

"You don't have to" Colin tried to cheer on Damian, knowing damn well that he would have a serious problem if Damian fell asleep now.

"Should I go get help Damian?"

"N-no" Damian stuttered, when he suddenly collapsed and crashed against Colin, eyes closed and moving under his lids.

"Shit."

* * *

><p>"Mr. Grayson!"<p>

Dick ignored the voice calling him and kept chatting with the cute bartender and her assistant, knowing that facing whoever was calling him meant leaving these two beauties that were competing for his attention.

"Mr. Grayson!" he heard it again, sighing annoyed but deciding to keep ignoring Colin, when he was grabbed by the arm.

"Mr. Grayson, Damian. He collapsed!"

Now Dick's head snapped around, the girls forgotten and stared at Colin.

"Where?"

Colin pulled at his arm and Dick hurried after him.

"What happened?" he asked as they hurried to the water.

"He collapsed in the water?" Dick asked, horrified.

"No, inside of a cave. We discovered it and he just… he just fell asleep. But he wouldn't wake up, even after ten minutes."

"Wait" Dick said, stopping the boy.

"Do you mean a cave with shining stones?"

Surprised, Colin nodded.

"Yeah, how – "

"I'm not here for the first time, boy. I discovered it ages ago. Come on – " he said, turning right and dragged Colin along.

" - there's an easier way to get in. So what happened after that, him sleeping isn't unusual."

Colin nodded, trying to keep up with the long-legged man.

"His breathing changed. He suddenly stopped for seconds, then sped up and I was really scared."

Okay, now Dick was really worried.  
>His heart clenched with worry over his little… brother.<p>

As soon as they reached a fallen tree that looked a bit too healthy to be old, Dick climbed over it and jumped down into the entrance he and Bruce had made.  
>Soon Colin followed and together they searched for Damian.<p>

When they reached the cave, all of Dick's instincts were screaming at him to run over there and shake the lifeless body.

"Colin… go get Bruce."

"But – "

"Now."

Hesitantly, Colin obliged, leaving Dick to rush over to Damian.

The moment he reached Damian, Dick gathered the boy in his arms, pressing his ear against the not rising chest.  
>He could hear the weak beating of a heart, growing weaker by the second, and suddenly horror took over.<p>

Images of memories flooded into his mind.

Black suits.  
>Rain.<br>Two holes, perfectly matching in size.  
>Then suddenly they merged into a smaller one.<br>A coffin next to them.  
>Tears and cries.<p>

"Fuck" he hissed, trying to clear his head.

Damian wasn't dead yet.

He lay him down and started to use all of his medical knowledge on the boy, trying to steady the breathing and the heartbeat.  
>But it was no use.<br>The heartbeat remained unsteady and more than once, Dick had to give Damian a cardiac massage.  
>He cursed and yelled at Damian, desperately trying anything he could to keep him alive.<p>

"Dick"

Dick didn't stop and ignored the hand that was placed on his shoulder,  
>when he was suddenly pulled away roughly and he looked up into Bruce's face, seriously concerned.<p>

"Let me handle this."

Even if he had wished to shout at Bruce to get away from Damian, Dick nodded and got up, kneeling down on Damian's side and grabbing his hand.

"Maybe you shouldn't hold him" Bruce said, raising a syringe, filled with bright blue liquid.

"He could crush your hand."

Dick didn't care.

"What is this?" he asked as Bruce gently positioned and stuck inside the needle, directly into Damian's throat.

But he didn't get an answer.

"What is this Bruce?"

Without a word, Bruce injected the fluid and stepped back, studying his son's lifeless face.  
>Suddenly, without a warning, Damian's eyes shot open and he ripped open his mouth, gasping for air.<br>Dick held him back from jumping up with one hand, while the other was caught in Damian's death-grip, threatening to break.

"Bruce!"

"Don't worry, he'll come down eventually."

Damian gasped loudly, tears running down his cheeks and fighting Dick's pressure on his body.

"He's in pain!" Dick shouted at Bruce, when slowly, Damian stopped fighting and his breathing calmed down.

Ignoring Dick's furious glares, Bruce leant down and checked Damian's vitals.

"He's stable, get him out of here and back to the Mansion."

He turned around and left, reminding Dick that Colin was still standing there, looking at them horrified.

"What was that?" the frightened boy asked, probably reminded of his experience with strangely glowing fluids.

Dick shook his head, looking back down at the now unconscious Damian.

"I don't know. But it saved his life."

* * *

><p>After that incident, Damian had been forbidden to go into the water again.<br>So, being unable to do anything else, Damian lay on his belly, under the umbrella, reading a book about ancient Greek history while the others were having fun.

Pouting, he reread the last chapter about Dionysus, not really having paid attention at all.

"So, how are you?"

Damian looked up and glared at Tim through his shades.

"Fuck off."

Annoyed, Tim flipped him the bird.

"Well screw you too."

The younger teen stuck out his tongue and returned the gesture, knowing well that his father was nowhere around.  
>Maybe no one would notice him killing Drake…<p>

"Better put some sun blocker on Drake, you could get a nasty burn on your white butt, Mr. Cheesy-cheeks."

Tim let out a sigh and shook his head, grinning smugly.

"This is stupid. You know what? I think I'll go take a dive into the cool water, maybe you should too, to cool your head."

Theatrically he covered his mouth and gasped surprised.

"Oh wait, you can't."

Laughing, Tim got up and left Damian alone.

In his mind, Damian killed Drake now, over and over again in the most creative ways…

But now that he was thinking about it, maybe he should put on some sunscreen.  
>Despite having a darker complexion, he could still get sunburned, something which he wasn't exactly keen on.<p>

But since he was lying under the umbrella anyway, he didn't have anything to worry about.  
>He plugged in his iPod and started playing his favourite playlist, when his mind drifted back to the day before.<p>

After he had reached the cave with Colin, he had suddenly felt that a fit was near and he panicked.  
>For weeks now, he kept trying to avoid these fits, not even daring to go to sleep normally.<br>All because his dreams had changed…  
>When he thought about the dreams he had had before, memories, certain feelings and wishes, he remembered them almost fondly in comparison to the ones he had now.<p>

They were terrifying him and he always felt horrible afterwards, worse than after the dream where he relived the death of his maid.

Whenever a fit arrived, or he closed his eyes and tried to sleep, pictures of himself, stabbing, slicing, strangling and ripping apart all the people he loved were there.  
>He couldn't fight them.<br>In his dream he would kill and torture all of them.  
>Grayson, Brown, his father, Colin… even Drake.<p>

And while he did that, he laughed.

He burst into giggles whenever a fountain of blood would gush out of Brown's delicate neck, or when Drake begged for his life.  
>Laughter shook his body when he strangled Grayson and watched the life disappear out of his eyes…<p>

But at the same time, he cried.

Tears were constantly running down his face, mixing in with the blood.

In his dream he always talked, but the others couldn't hear him, no one could, not even himself.  
>He just saw his dream-self's mouth move, without ever hearing a sound besides the laughter.<p>

Damian shook his head violently, trying to chase away the remains of the dream.  
>As he returned his attention to the book, he slowly felt dizzy.<br>He could hear the ocean even over the music and because of this combination; he felt his body starting to relax.

It had been weeks since he had last slept well.  
>Now his whole body began to prepare for slumber, and somehow Damian didn't have the strength to fight it any more.<p>

He was ripped out of his almost sleeping state when a person dropped down beside him.

"Hey Damian" he heard Drake sighing.

"Dick told me to help you put on some suns – "

"Fuck off" Damian slurred, nuzzling into the comfortably warm blanket.

He heard a malicious chuckle.

"Okay, whatever."

Damian felt a towel being dropped on his head, but he was too tired to remove it or throw it after Drake, so he simply left it there.  
>After Drake had left, Damian felt himself dropping into slumber.<br>But this time it was dreamless and completely soothing, allowing Damian to rest for once.  
>He wished that he could stay like this forever.<br>Light, warm and completely at peace for a moment.

The next thing he realized was the loud laughter of an annoying voice and Grayson yelling at Drake for some reason.  
>He felt cold hands gently pushing him aside a bit, and he wanted to jump up and shout at the perpetrator when he felt a blanket being wrapped around him and a seething pain on his back.<p>

Crying out, Damian ripped his eyes open and jerked his head to the side, his shades flying who knows where.  
>He stared directly into Dick's worried face, while he was being picked up.<p>

"What - ?"

Dick sighed and smiled almost apologizing.

"You didn't have any sunscreen on and now your back is burned. At least your head was covered."

Damian cursed, feeling each and every movement and winced when Dick had to tighten his hold on him because he almost stumbled.

"Shit…"

"Sorry Dami."

Completely drained of his power, Damian let his head fall against Dick's shoulder and sighed, too beat to care about being carried like a girl.  
>At least he had been able to sleep peaceful for a moment.<p>

"Let's build a sandcastle when you're better okay? Just lying around is probably not that good for you."

Not even opening his eyes, Damian scoffed.

"As if I'd do something as childish as a sandcastle…"

"Oh you will, Dami."

Dick chuckled and realized that Damian had fallen asleep in his arms.

Not even on purpose, he wondered if Dami would relax in Bruce's arms, or if this was a privilege reserved for him…


	12. Twelfth dream

**A/N: hey guys :) i am sorry for the delay, i was out of the country for two weeks and had no w-lan :(  
>Also, i was sick for a week.<br>Anyway :) enjoy the second paaart :D**

* * *

><p>Damian woke up, the moment he heard the sound of steps in front of his door.<br>Eyes closed and lying still, he wondered who or what could be on the other side, and when the knob was turned and the door was swinging open slowly, Damian prepared to defend himself by reaching for the knife that was hidden under one of his countless pillows.

"Damian… are you asleep?"

Barely managing to hold back an annoyed sigh, Damian opened his eyes but kept his back turned to the door.

"Yes, Wilkes, I am asleep."

"Oh" came the apologetic response

"Sorry, then…"

Damian had hoped Colin would leave after realising that he had no intention of telling horror stories or building a fort in the middle of the night or doing any of his childish ideas…

But even after a minute, Colin stood in the door, now awkwardly stepping from one to the other foot, making annoying sounds.

Damian turned around with a groan.

"What is it Wilkes?!"

The light from the hallway, which shone in through the open door, revealed a nervous and terrified Colin dressed in a shirt and his boxers, desperately pressing a teddy bear to his chest.

"I…"

He didn't finish, but began to study his naked feet.  
>Damian was worried, he really was, but on the other side he had no idea how to help Colin.<br>Being well aware of Colin's fear of darkness and his other numerous phobias and anxiety problems, he couldn't help but feel helpless when it came to comfort the other boy.  
>All he knew was that one time, when he had been afraid and felt terrible, he had snuck into Grayson's bed.<br>That had helped him…

"Wil… Colin" Damian said and pulled up the covers and averting his eyes, embarrassed to the bone.

For a moment Colin froze, taken aback by the inviting gesture, but eventually he smiled and turned to close the door.  
>But when his fingers touched the wood, he realized that as soon as the door would close, it would be completely dark inside…<br>He gulped audibly and closed his eyes, trying to calm his shaking fingers, when suddenly a light flickered on behind him.

Looking over his shoulder, he saw Damian setting down a small flashlight on the nightstand.  
>Shooting him a wry smile, Colin closed the door and hurried to get under the cover, Damian kept holding up.<p>

The bed was huge, but still Colin felt safer when Damian was lying next to him, and he fell asleep instantly, still holding his beloved teddy bear.

A bit confused, but happy to have helped, Damian shook his head smiling and decided to try and get some sleep himself, which was not an easy thing to do since his back was still badly burned…

* * *

><p>The next morning, Dick witnessed something terribly adorable and he had to hold back his grin, or it would have split his skull…<br>Colin had somehow decided that Damian was just as suitable for a teddy bear as the old plush bear in his arms, and was lying on his side,  
>arms around Damian and his head snuggled into the black hair,<br>while Damian was completely knocked out and breathing calmly, an innocent look on his face.

Dick's fingers were itching to reach for the phone and take a picture of it, but he was sure that Damian would kill if he ever found out about its existence…

As if he had sensed Dick's thoughts, Damian ripped open his eyes and stared up at him in confusion.  
>His eyes darted around and he noticed the arms of the still sleeping boy around him, and when his face turned from confusion to embarrassment and finally to anger in a second,<br>Dick couldn't help but burst into laughter.

"Shut it Grayson!" Damian yelled, shoving Colin off him and waking him in the process.

Yawning and rubbing his eyes a bit confused, Colin rolled over and sat up slowly.

"What's wro-" he couldn't finish his sentence when something pushed past him and he saw the laughing Dick Grayson being wrestled to the ground.

Damian had taken Dick by surprise and was now sitting on his chest, gripping and violently shaking his collar,  
>desperate to stop the laughing noises that came out of that jerk's mouth.<br>But Dick wouldn't stop and pulled a dirty trick to get the boy off of him.  
>He slapped his back with both hands… hard.<p>

Damian yelped and let go, when Dick gently pushed him off and got up.  
>While Dick had to stop laughing, Damian glared at him and bit down on his lip, trying to ignore the stinging on his back.<p>

"Is breakfast ready?" Colin asked, voice heavy with drowsiness, and reminded the other two that Colin was still there.

"Yeah" Dick said, chuckling still.

"That's what I came here for actually."

* * *

><p>Down in the dining room, Bruce was reading the newspaper, amused by the news in metropolis and the trouble his friend Clark had to deal with.<p>

The whole morning had been really quiet and to Bruce's liking,  
>but as soon as Dick entered the dining room, followed by Damian and Colin, it was as if a sound bomb had been dropped on the house.<br>Damian was bickering and complaining about Dick, while said man just laughed and returned some of the friendly insults loudly.

And as soon as Tim entered, the chaos was complete.  
>Insults and threats were thrown back and forth while occasionally either Dick or Colin tried to calm the situation, causing even more noise…<p>

Bruce sighed and set down his newspaper.

"Boys"

No reaction.

"Boys!"

Still no reaction, only a flying sausage hitting Tim's nose.

"BOYS!" Bruce shouted, silencing all of them instantly.

Sighing annoyed, he studied the scene.  
>Dick was standing between Damian and Tim, both armed with forks and a bit of sauce dripping from Tim's nose, and Colin pulling at Damian's arm.<p>

"Sit down and eat peacefully" Bruce growled, his voice threatening but efficient.

All the boys sat down and started filling their plates with the dishes Alfred had prepared, and eventually conversations were starting among them.  
>Tim would discuss his plans for the day with Dick, while Colin desperately tried to talk Damian into building a fort with him.<br>Bruce smiled at the thought and remembered Dick doing the same when he had been younger.  
>Alfred and Bruce had often been forced to play tiny little wars with the boy and even if Bruce would never admit it openly, he had always enjoyed these moments, and sometimes missed them even now.<br>After Dick, there weren't many opportunities to play with the children.  
>Jason loved to play as well, but Bruce decided not to go there…<p>

Damian was now in the right age to play, maybe a bit late, but he had never experienced a real childhood anyway.  
>A bit concerned, Bruce watched his son smiling slightly while Dick was telling a joke that made the others burst into laughter.<p>

Even though Damian tried hard, Bruce knew that the boy hadn't understood a thing Dick was joking about.  
>He smiled and acted as if, but from the way his eyes kept searching for Dick's desperately, Bruce saw that he was insecure and searched for someone that could assure him…<br>And that person wasn't him.

It wasn't as if Bruce blamed Damian for that, or Dick for that matter, but it still hurt a bit.  
>Now that Bruce had decided to act a father, Dick had been watching every interaction between them like an overprotective hen, pulling Damian away as soon as he saw a hint of an error on Bruce's side.<br>But because of that, Bruce couldn't get close to Damian, they had to collide and fight before making up to get to know each other…  
>Bruce was ripped out of his thoughts, when Alfred turned on the lights.<p>

"Alfred, why did you turn on the lights?" he asked, giving the butler a confused look.

"Didn't you notice, sir? There's a storm going on outside, and it was rather dark in here."

And really, when Bruce looked outside, he saw dark clouds and he could hear the rain, which he hadn't noticed while he had been lost in thoughts.  
>Bruce nodded and began to eat his now cold eggs.<br>Silence came over the group, until Dick set down his fork and he cleared his throat.

"So, now I know for a fact that someone wants to build a fort, and since the weather is horrible, how about a little fort-war?"

Colin instantly threw his arms up and agreed, while both Tim and Damian buried their faces in their hands, sighing annoyed.

"Aw, come on guys, it will be fun!"

More annoyed groaning.

"Yeah, I think it will be fun" Bruce said smiling, when all eyes fell upon him, genuinely surprised.

"What?" he asked, chuckling at their surprised faces.

"You will play too?" Dick tried to hide his confusion, but failed miserably.

"Why not?"

A little pause followed before Tim decided to speak up.

"Okay, since Dick won't stop harassing us all with the idea anyway, we'd better get it over with. Two groups? "

Everyone except for Damian agreed and Dick got up to stand behind Colin and Damian.

"Team win will be Colin, Dami and me" he said, grinning widely.

"Nope" Tim interfered "The boys must be split up, everyone gets a midget in their group and I call dibs on Colin."

"Oh no, you won't" Dick threatened and glared at Tim, a challenging smile on his lips.

While the two of them kept fighting over the teams, Damian sighed and turned his head, trying to ignore the stupid exchange of threats and taunts that flew over his head.  
>To his surprise, he saw his father, smiling amused and leaning back in his chair.<br>After about a second, Bruce noticed Damian staring at him with a curious look.

He smiled and shrugged as if to apologize for his older sons' behaviour, and Damian returned the smile.

"Okay, if you want the midgets, I will take Bruce!" Tim snapped at Dick.

"Oh no, believe me, you don't want him! He won't let you do anything at all, besides getting kidnapped by the other team maybe!"

Bruce sighed and got up.

"Boys, if you can't decide and if neither of you wants me in your team, throwing away every chance of winning at the same time, then I will decide."

He pointed at Tim.

"You will be leader of team red. Dick and Colin will be in your team. Team black will be leaded by Damian, while Alfred and I will support him."

"What?!" Tim, Dick, Alfred and Damian asked at the same time, but only Damian seemed to be happy about it.

"No questions, no disagreeing, choose a room and get started with building boys, all out war starts in an hour."

* * *

><p>"Dick! Help us damn it! This stuff is pretty heavy!" Tim snapped, trying to keep the wall built from chairs and what looked like a huge dresser from collapsing.<p>

Colin tried to help him, but was too short to actually help.  
>Frustrated, he sighed and decided that abuse would be a lot better at doing this job.<br>He transformed, ripping apart his shirt and startling Tim enough to make him stumble and fall over a discarded chair.  
>Cursing, Tim got up and slid inside the fort through an almost invisible entrance, where Dick was sitting, pouting.<p>

"What's wrong? It's as if you don't enjoy building forts all of a sudden."

Dick sighed and leaned back against the wall.

"First of all, I wanted to play against you, you have always been a challenge to beat at this" he said smiling  
>"And secondly, I don't think Damian is having a good time over there, I mean Bruce is in his team, and you know how the two of them get along…"<p>

Tim shrugged.

"When it comes to missions, they are professional, well, most of the time. And on top of that, why aren't you giving Bruce a chance? I think he's trying hard."

"I think he's messed up too many times. The boy is already pretty screwed up, and Bruce isn't helping.  
>You know how hard it was for us to earn his trust, do you really think Damian will ever be acknowledged by him? Because I don't".<p>

"Yeah, well, I don't know. You know both of them better than I do, but I think that you aren't fair either.  
>You keep shielding Damian from everyone and everything, when all he needs is to be on his own from time to time."<p>

Dick glared at him.

"He was raised to be an emotionless killer machine, do you really think what he needs is being alone?"

"I never said alone. I think that he needs to achieve something on his own.  
>What I am telling you now is stuff I have been thinking about, it can all be complete BS, but it seems reasonable to me.<br>You said he was raised to be emotionless, right?  
>But to me he seems like the most emotional person ever!<br>He gets angry and frustrated for no reason, laughs and jokes, is very hotheaded and whatnot.  
>He has lots of emotions building up constantly, so I think he doesn't need to be protected and shielded all the time.<br>He needs to find something for himself.  
>He has always been guarded and controlled, whether it was Talia, father, you his stupid vision of being heir to the batman or whatever.<br>He has never lived a life for himself, only for others, so maybe he needs to find a place and reason on his own."

Impressed and a bit taken aback by the mass of thoughts Tim was pouring on him, Dick thought that maybe he was right.

"I mean it's great to have a family backing you up, but sometimes you need to be on your own and astray to find your way back home, you know?" Tim said, ending his little rant and smiling wryly.

"That had nothing to do with Damian, right?"

"Yes it did, it was just inspired from personal experience."

Dick smiled and gently put an arm around his little brother.

"You know, you can be a great brother for Damian, a pity that he doesn't realize it."

* * *

><p>Damian leaned back against the wall yawning and propping his feet up in the unusually big and well-built fort.<p>

"When will they start? It's been ages since we started."

"Exactly thirty minutes, Master Damian."

"You really think our defences are good enough Alfred?" Bruce asked checking the canons he had built using pillows, rolled up yoga mats and a bit of explosive powder.

They'd probably backfire, but Bruce had had fun to build them.

Alfred didn't even answer, knowing that for emergencies, Damian and Bruce had even installed an electric defence grid…

"I will go and get some rations for the warriors" Alfred said, a hint of sarcasm in his voice, before leaving the fort.

"Do you think he'll return?" Damian asked

Smiling, Bruce shook his head.

"I seriously doubt it."

Chuckling, Damian shrugged.

When silence took over again, the atmosphere turned a bit awkward and Damian nervously started fidgeting with his fingers.  
>He wanted to ask his father something, but he didn't know how to ask without looking like an insecure wimp.<p>

"Fa-"

"Da-"

Both started at the same time, and Bruce laughed a bit confused.

"You first, Damian."

"No, I, uh…" Damian searched for words and realized that he had none that he could use "I forgot what I wanted to say."

"Okay, then I will go first. Are you okay Damian? I mean, have you told anyone what's been bugging you?"

Damian shook his head.

"Damian, you know what we have agreed on."

"And you just broke the agreement" Damian snapped "You said you'd leave me alone with that!"

"Okay, I will stop now, okay? I am just worried" Bruce admitted, hoping to calm Damian a bit.

Sighing, Damian nodded and tried to smile a bit.

"I am fine, father. But…" Damian began to tug at his shirt a bit, nervous to ask "…why did you choose me? I mean as leader and in your team?  
>I was sure you'd want to be on Drake's team."<p>

When Damian felt a hand on his head, he almost jumped, but he held his breath the moment he saw his father smiling at him.  
>It was strange, but whenever his father was like this, caring and comforting, Damian was afraid to ruin the moment by even breathing.<p>

"I wanted to team up with you, because we never seem to spend time outside of patrol and I know that you are a great leader."

A bit flustered, Damian nodded and averted his eyes, not daring to move away from his father.  
>He knew that the relationship between him and his father would never be as close as it was with Dick, but it was something special and he sincerely enjoyed moments like this.<p>

When he opened his mouth to say something, his ears noticed a very faint noise outside in the hallway.  
>His father had heard it too and both were now in battle mode, prepared to take down anyone that would dare to enter their territory.<p>

Bruce went from open to completely calm and calculating while a smug and challenging grin spread on Damian's face.  
>They exchanged a knowing look before jumping into the now open battle.<p>

* * *

><p>After four hours of fighting, attempted and failed peace negotiations, betrayal and tragedy, the guys were seriously exhausted and rested on the remains of their destroyed forts that were scattered all over the hallway.<p>

Everyone was happy when Alfred came around with drinks and snacks.  
>And as soon as he wasn't needed anymore, Colin decided to retreat into his room to change his ripped clothes.<p>

"Wow" Tim said, breathing heavily "that was pretty epic. Now who's the winner?"

No one answered and when he looked around he noticed that no one had even listened to him.  
>Damian had fallen asleep and Bruce was picking him up to carry the boy into his room while Dick glared at the two of them.<br>Bruce was simply happy to have spent such a lively day with his kids and to be able to bond a bit with his son.  
>He had noticed Damian falling asleep soon after Alfred had appeared at the end of the hallway, carrying bottles of soda and snacks.<br>While the others had been practically stomping over to the butler, Damian had stayed behind.  
>The boy had been fighting the sleep so hard, that he had to brace himself on Bruce's arm before he collapsed.<br>A bit concerned, Bruce had checked Damian's vitals before deciding that it was a harmless fit and that he should get the boy into his room.  
>Of course, the glares shot at him by Dick hadn't gone unnoticed, but Bruce would take care of that some other time.<p>

Like an hour later in his study.

"Bruce?"

Bruce looked up and saw Dick standing in the doorframe, wearing comfortable sweatpants and a black cardigan.

Inviting him in, Bruce nodded and waited for Dick to sit down.

"I wanted to talk about something."

"It's about Damian, right?"

Dick squint his eyes and shook his head.

"Not exactly. I wanted to talk about the stuff you gave him the last time he had a fit. The thing that – "

"Saved his life?" Bruce asked, raising an eyebrow.

"And hurt him badly, yes. It was and still is suspicious, why would you inject him with something like that?"

Bruce sighed and folded his hands on the wooden desk.

"It was the prototype for an antidote."

"So you have something?"

"Something, yeah, but essential things are still missing.  
>This one was simply to wake him up from a coma, I just knew that it was dangerous, so I tried not to use it before."<p>

"But the fits won't stop?"

"No."

"So it was useless? And you put your son in danger on top of that?!" Dick had gotten angry and was now on the edge of snapping.

"Dick – "

"No! Bruce, he cried! He almost broke my hand while he had some sort of other fit! He could have died!"

"Okay, now what would you suggest we do the next time he is on the verge of dying?"

Surprised, Dick realized that Bruce was right and that there had been no other solution, but still he didn't want to give in.

"Just… something else, I don't know! You are Batman!"

Bruce frowned and studied Dick over the desk.

"This is not about the injection Dick, and we both know that. It's about Damian and whom he trusts, right?  
>You have been annoyed the whole time, is it really because you think Damian prefers me now?"<p>

No answer.

"Dick" Bruce smiled weakly "honestly? I would love to say it's true, but we both know that Damian will never like me more than you.  
>The boy loves and adores you, just… give me a chance to at least become a part of his life too, okay?"<p>

Suddenly, Dick felt bad about yelling at Bruce like that.  
>Tim and Bruce had been right, he wasn't being fair.<br>Bruce was Damian's father, but all Dick did was shield Damian, but not because he wanted to protect Damian.  
>It was only because he wanted Damian all to himself…<p>

"I'm sorry, Bruce…"

"It's okay. Just, don't always go and question his love for you."

Dick nodded and got up.

"You are a great father, you do know that, right Bruce?"

Bruce shrugged and watched Dick leave.

Was he a good father?  
>He was trying, and sometimes it was for the best to let go.<br>That was a lesson he had had to learn as soon as Dick had grown up, when Jason died and left him…  
>He was aware that letting Damian go was in the boy's best interest, but it was still strange.<p>

* * *

><p>The moment Damian awoke, he pressed his face into the pillow to hold back a scream.<br>Cursing and shaking, he wrapped his arms around his body and pulled up his legs, curling into a ball.  
>When tears threatened to flow, he fought them back.<br>Pictures of the dream returned and he could hear the screams in his mind.

"Go away" he hissed to no one in particular.

But they didn't go away.  
>The pictures stayed, the screams, the feeling of blood on his skin…<p>

Quickly, Damian got out of bed and grabbed a hoodie that was thrown on the ground.

He had to get out of here, away from the others.

When his eyes flickered to his bag, filled with numerous weapons, he felt a wave of nausea and he fled the room.  
>He didn't dare to breathe until he was out of the house and the still warm ocean breeze filled his lungs.<p>

But it was still too close to them.

Only when he had reached the beach, Damian allowed himself to rest.  
>Sitting down close to the water, Damian looked up into the sky, and for the first time in years he noticed the stars.<p>

Of course, he had seen them almost every night, but never actually took a moment to study them.  
>They calmed him a bit, but he knew that only one thing could completely calm his nervous mind.<p>

Suddenly something inside of his hoodie began to vibrate, and Damian fished out his phone.  
>It was a text message, and he decided to open it in the morning, but as he held the phone in his hand like that, his fingers began to itch.<p>

Should he do it?  
>it was better than going there in person, something that he wanted to avoid at all cost.<br>And almost unconsciously, the number was dialled.

He listened to the dial tone, until he heard someone pick up.

"Yeah?" came the slurred answer

"Grayson" Damian said, trying to keep his voice from shaking.

"Dami?" Suddenly, Dick seemed to be wide awake.

"Why are you calling? Are you all right? Should I come over?"

"No, I am not inside of the house anymore."

"Are you okay?" Dick asked worried.

For a moment, Damian thought of lying and hanging up, but then the screams were there again.

"No."

"Okay, where are you? I'll be there in a –"

"No, don't come! I can't be near you right now."

"okay… why?"

"Can I just… tell you over the phone?" Damian asked, voice breaking at the end.

"Of course" came the answer, worry swinging in it.

"I… I have been having these nightmares…"

And then, the words wouldn't stop.  
>Damian told Dick about his dreams and his fears of them coming true.<br>He didn't care about the tears that he felt running down his cheeks.  
>The only thing that mattered right now was that he finally got rid of the tension that had been building up inside of him for weeks.<p>

Dick never interrupted him and patiently listened, occasionally aha-ing and mhm-ing.

When Damian was finished, he clutched the phone, waiting for some kind of reaction.

"Damian, it's okay, I'll hang up now."

"What?!" Damian asked, not believing what he had just heard, when suddenly the connection was gone.

Dick couldn't just hang up like that…  
>Damian had just told him over the phone that he was scared as hell that he'd hurt them and Dick just hung up?!<p>

For a second, Damian stared at his phone, still not sure if that had just happened, when he felt someone sitting down next to him.  
>When he looked up, he saw Dick's blue eyes looking into his.<br>This time, Dick wasn't smiling.

"I'm here."

Immediately, Damian got up and wanted to run, but Dick held him back, an iron grip around his wrist.

"I told you not to come! I don't know what I'd do!" Damian shouted and tried to free himself.

Dick smiled wryly.

"Remember when I told you that you were like a wild kitten?"

Ignoring the remark, Damian started to dig his nails into Dick's hand, drawing blood.

"See, a kitten."

"Stop it!" Damian yelled.

Suddenly, Damian was pulled down, too fast for him to react.  
>Dick wrapped his arms around Damian and held him in place, not allowing him to move an inch.<p>

"Why would you think that you'd hurt me?"

"Maybe because you are hurting me you asshole!" Damian screamed, feeling the seething pain of his burned back.

"Oh sorry " Dick said chuckling "Stay and I will loosen my grip, okay?"

"No."

"Okay, well then it will have to go like this."

Damian hissed and tried to fight the grip, but in the end he gave up, it was no use anyway.  
>As promised, Dick loosened his grip a bit and now it was more of a hug than a wrestling grip.<p>

After a while, Damian finally rested his head against Dick's shoulder and close his eyes, letting out a deep sigh.

"Feeling better?" Dick asked, gently brushing his fingers through Damian's black hair.

Damian nodded but made no attempts to move away.

"You know that you don't have to be afraid, Damian, nothing will happen."

Still no answer.

"I will always be there for you, and I have no doubt that you'd never hurt me, not seriously at least."

"But what if?"

"No if, you are not a puppet Damian, and those are just dreams.  
>You think I never had dreams like that?<br>Sometimes, I still dream that I was the one who killed my parents… that it was all my fault."

"It isn't, you couldn't possibly have done anything to change what happened."

Smiling, Dick leaned his head against Damian's.

"I know… thanks. But do you get what I mean?  
>Dreams are fears, memories or even emotions that manifest themselves so we can learn to deal with them.<br>You just have to overcome your fear."

Again, Damian nodded and leaned into the hug, tired of all the stress that had been lifted off of him.

"Wanna go back?" Dick asked, but Damian shook his head and allowed himself to relax a bit before he fell asleep.

* * *

><p>Unfortunately, the vacation ended short when Bruce got an emergency call from the justice league and they all decided to go home.<br>Dick promised Colin that they would build sandcastles the next time, but for now, vacation was over.

After Bruce had returned from the mission, he went upstairs to knock on Damian's door.

"Yes?" came an annoyed answer.

"it's me Damian."

Quickly, the door flew open and Bruce saw Damian, covered in sweat and dressed in training clothes, holding his home-made eskrima sticks.

"Training?"

Damian nodded and gave him a curious look.

"I just came to ask if you have kept your end of the bargain."

Annoyed, Damian sighed and rolled his eyes, but smiled.

"Yes i have. i told someone."

Bruce smiled and nodded.

"How about some training together?"

A challenging grin spread across Damian's face and he nodded, inviting his father into the room.  
>Maybe Bruce would never be as close to Damian as Dick was, but he would still try to be a good father.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>AN: hey :) so i took out the sandcastles part, i just wanted it to end like this (the chapter, not the story) but as we are this far in the story, i have to confess something :(  
>The ending of this story has already been roughly done and i will work on ending it in about three chapters.<br>BUT! it won't be the end of Batman stories ;) i just want to finish the story with the poison. i will start two new Dami-centered stories :)**

**So please stay tuned :)  
><strong>


	13. Thirteenth dream

**A/N: **Hi guys :) sorry for the long hiatus :/  
>I was busy with work and have been through some really horrible months, at first I didn't plan on continuing any of my stories, but now that things are looking up again, I couldn't keep myself from taking up the pen again.<p>

Now, some have asked me for specific chapters with some of the DC characters, and I really look forward to realize some of them, but not in this story.  
>The storyline with the narkolepsy is coming to an end, while two other Dami-centered stories are being written :)<p>

If any of the readers here have been reading my Homestuck story: I am working on a new chapter and I am writing two new stories on the side :)

Recommended music: Bangarang - Skrillex / Witchcraft - Pendulum

* * *

><p>Seriously?<p>

Damian stared at the front door that closed behind his father's and the butler's back.

Seriously now?

Scoffing, Damian turned and headed for the living room.  
>He let himself fall onto the couch, angry and annoyed at how he day had started.<br>It had been supposed to be a big day, or at least that was how Grayson had described it to him.

But instead of a party, cake and other things that were traditional for normal children, Damian woke up to everyone leaving early and his father telling him not to wait with lunch, or dinner.

Great.  
>It was not as if Damian had wanted something to happen on his birthday, that would have been ridiculous.<br>But…

Grayson wasn't even here.  
>He was working on a case in New York and hadn't even sent a message, despite being the one who had chosen this particular date as his birthday.<br>Still pouting, Damian sat on the couch and looked around in the still decorated living room.  
>A huge Christmas tree stood in one of the corners and fake presents lay underneath.<br>They hadn't celebrated Christmas, or new years for that matter, because Batman and Robin had to work throughout the holidays.  
>It would have been one of the first real celebrations with the Wayne family, but of course, that didn't bother Damian.<br>He also wasn't annoyed… or disappointed…

Fighting back the sick feeling of rage he felt deep down, Damian glanced at the black screen of his mobile, hoping that it would light up.  
>But it didn't.<br>Of course there was always the possibility to initiate a conversation with Grayson, Brown or Wilkes, but that would have proven that Damian was really hurt by the neglect…

Not that he was of course.

Then, suddenly, his phone began to vibrate.  
>Surprised, Damian stared at the phone, when he eventually decided to maybe answer the phone.<p>

"Yes?"

"Dami?"

Hope flickered inside of Damian's chest and he began to smile.

"Yes, Grayson, what is it?"

"I just called to ask if Tim's been around lately. I need to talk to him and he hasn't answered my calls."

"Is that all?"

"Yes, so – "

Not letting Dick finish, Damian hung up and threw the phone away, watching it slide across the floor and under the Christmas tree.  
>He wasn't angry, he wasn't frustrated or disappointed… certainly not.<p>

There was a perfectly normal explanation for the irrational anger he felt and the weird pain he felt in his chest, making it harder to breathe.  
>It had nothing to do with the fact that apparently no one seemed to remember that it was his birthday today, and that maybe no one cared about it…<br>No one cared to celebrate that he had come to exist…

The sound of footsteps ripped him out of his thoughts, and Damian took his fighting stance quickly, grabbing shuriken out of his sweat pants instinctively.  
>No one was in, so it had to be an intruder, but why hadn't Titus noticed it?<br>The big Dane had been trained on instantly alerting Damian in case of intrusion… so if there was an intruder, they had to be good and informed… knowing about the guard dog.

"Who is th – "

Damian stopped and dropped to the floor, hearing the sharp sound of iron darts, which only barely failed to hit him.  
>Not feeling like wasting any time in fighting back, Damian caught himself with his hands and twisted them, so that he spun around on the floor.<br>Unfortunately he had dropped the shuriken and so he lost a second to pull out another pair.  
>He got back on his feet quickly, but remained low, listening for more arrows and trying to scope out his attacker.<br>Just when he thought that maybe the attacker had retreated, Damian heard glass bursting and he had to shield his eyes from the shards that flew through the air.

"Shit!"

Damian didn't even see them, but the shots hadn't come from the window, so there had to be multiple attackers…  
>With a back flip, Damian took cover behind the couch, hoping that there was no one to stab him in the back.<br>He wanted to yell at them, but that would have betrayed his position, so he kept quiet.  
>Suddenly, he heard a weak whimper to his left. It came from the entrance.<br>Careful not to let himself be seen, Damian pulled the necklace he was wearing over his head.  
>It was a tiny mirror, a present from his mother. She had told him that one day, he'd need it, and since then, it had come in handy many times.<br>With the mirror in hand, Damian tried to peer around the corner of the couch, to see where the whimper had come from, though he already had a suspicion and he wished that he would be proven wrong.

But unfortunately he wasn't.

A man stood in the entrance, dressed in black fighting gear that shielded every inch of skin.  
>His eyes were hidden behind goggles, probably equipped with night vision.<br>But the man wasn't the thing that unsettled Damian, it was the black bundle that hung weakly from the man's hand.  
>The man dropped the bundle and Titus let out yet another whimper that made Damian cringe inwardly.<br>These bastards had hurt his dog, and they'd pay for that!  
>Fortunately, there was no blood, though, so maybe it wasn't too bad.<p>

"Come out little boy" said the man, his voice distorted and mechanical.

"Come out, or we will have to hurt your little friend."

Damian fought back the urge to jump out and gut that guy like the pig he was and forced himself to calm down.  
>Rushing would only make matters worse, and since the guy seemed to be the only one who had entered the building, Damian guessed that it was no killing mission, it was a kidnapping, or it should be one.<br>The question was, were they after Damian Wayne, or Damian Al Ghul?  
>He couldn't exactly tell by the gear, but he suspected them to be members of the league of shadows, which would allow him to fight with all he had.<br>The problem was, that if they weren't after Damian Al Ghul, but after the son of Bruce Wayne, his actions could lead to the discovery of Batman's identity… something Damian didn't want to risk.

"We won't hurt you, we just want you to come with us."

Damian didn't answer, that was exactly what they wanted him to do, so that they could estimate his position…

"Okay, well if you won't come out, we will have to take measures."

At first, Damian expected the guy to search the room, but when he heard Titus growl weakly, he feared for the worst.  
>Through his mirror, he saw that the man had drawn a dagger and positioned it over the dog's flank, threatening to slice the poor animal open.<br>Still fighting his instincts, Damian felt all of his muscles tense up and he wished that he could do something, that stupid asshole should simply say or do something that would indicate his intentions…

The second, Damian had spent on thinking, was enough for the man to act.  
>A cry of pain dug directly into Damian's heart and for a second he froze.<br>Titus kept yelping and tried to fight the torture, while Damian cowered behind the couch, desperately thinking about what to do.  
>But after what felt like hours of his dog and friend being tortured, Damian snapped.<br>He shot around the Couch, Shuriken in hand, and charged towards the attacker.

Surprised, the man only managed to raise his head, before he was ripped away from the injured dog and three Shuriken were thrust into his throat, cutting the arteries.  
>Damian heard movement from outside the burst window and grabbed the attacker's dagger, throwing it in the estimated direction.<br>A gurgling sound followed by a loud thump confirmed his guess, and Damian used that short second of surprise to jump off the corpse and turn midair.  
>Four more attackers, all dressed the same, had entered the living room, but only three were left.<br>Damian still had no idea who they were, or why they were after him, but there were enough reasons.  
>Normally, he would have stayed to fight them, but Titus was hurt and bleeding badly, so Damian decided to retreat for the moment.<br>While landing, he pulled some smoke-bomb out of his pants, ready to use, before he carefully picked up his dog.  
>Just when the attackers were almost close enough to reach out for him, Damian smashed the handful of bombs into one of the attackers face.<br>He smiled, when he heard the pained scream and fled up the stairs, Titus heavy in his arms.

When he reached his room, Damian picked up some weapons and a first-aid kit before stepping in front of the fireplace.  
>He turned a tiny figurine that was set on it, and silently, the fireplace opened, revealing a hidden passage.<br>With his dog, Damian made his way through the passage, just in time before he heard his door exploding.

After a while of dragging his dog through the passage, Damian reached a little room, where he had enough space to treat Titus.  
>The Dane kept whimpering quietly, as if he knew that too much noise could lead the assassins to them.<p>

"Shh, Titus, it will be fine."

Though it had been meant to soothe the dog, Damian felt like it was more to himself…  
>The though of losing Titus caused Damian's finger to shake and his throat to dry out.<p>

"You will be okay, I promise."

Damian carefully treated the dog's wound, but he wasn't sure if he'd ever be able to walk again if he didn't get a proper treatment quickly.  
>As if to calm Damian, Titus stopped whimpering and gently licked Damian's hands clean from the blood.<br>It was almost soothing, but when Damian heard loud thumps, his heart began to beat faster again.  
>If he stayed here, they were bound to find him; it was only a matter of time.<p>

The passage led outside and into the Bat cave, but he wouldn't be able to flee with Titus in his arms, so Damian had to take care of him first, also he had to contact his father somehow.  
>Nervously, Damian searched his hoodie for his mobile, but no chance.<br>He searched all of his pockets, but it was nowhere to be found.  
>Groaning, Damian slapped his forehead.<p>

"I threw it under the tree…"

The thumps became louder and Damian guessed that it was a matter of minutes until they'd break through the wall, so he took Titus and carefully carried him out of the room and further through the passage, until they reached a trapdoor.  
>Damian opened it and peered through the opening to make sure it was safe.<br>After not seeing anyone or any trace of intrusion, Damian got out of his hoodie and positioned Titus on it.  
>He used the sleeves to dangle the dog down and slid through the trapdoor, bracing himself with his feet, until the Titus safely landed on the floor.<p>

"Now be a good boy and stay there until I come and get you, okay?"

The dog looked up at him, tired from the strain and scoffed.

"If I won't come and get you, wait until Grayson or Father is here, let no one else come and get you, okay?"

Titus scoffed again and lowered his head, but kept his ears up, taking in all of the noise.

It was hard to leave the dog behind, but Damian eventually climbed up again and closed the door.  
>He followed the passage, constantly expecting hands to grab him from behind and dragging him out, when suddenly his knees buckled and he crashed to the floor.<p>

Damian cursed and tried to get up, but he felt all of his strength leaving his body slowly and the weird numbness began to take him over again.

"Not now… please I can't fall asleep now…"

Stumbling and swaying, Damian kept walking, until he finally reached the door that led outside.  
>He entered the keyword into the security lock and closed his eyes from the sunlight that would blind him as soon as the door was opened.<br>Cold air and snow welcomed him and regenerated at least some of his energy.  
>Opening his eyes, Damian stepped outside, not caring about the cold snow under his bare feet.<br>The door swung shut behind him, and he fought to stay awake, but slowly, his vision began to blur and Damian barely even noticed that he collapsed.

Voices flew to him as if they were far away and everything faded to black.

"We have him, yes, we have your son."

* * *

><p>"NO!"<p>

Damian opened his eyes and turned around, seeing a woman running towards him.

Mother, he wondered, but the voice hadn't sounded like his mother's.

"Damian run!"

Confused, Damian stared at the woman running towards him, when suddenly he felt a searing pain ripping apart his shoulder.  
>Suddenly, time slowed down and Damian turned his head to see what had caused the pain, too shocked to scream or collapse.<br>A figure towered over him, but he couldn't make out any details, it was just a black figure, grinning madly down at him.

"Young Master!"

Then, realisation hit him…

Damian screamed out in pain and his knees gave in.  
>The man turned around to flee, but something flickered in the air and suddenly, the man stopped and began to gurgle.<br>A sharp sound followed before blood began flowing out of the man's throat.  
>Damian watched the head dropping before the body collapsed, not realizing what had just happened, when he was pulled into warm, safe arms.<p>

"Hang in there, young Master."

Salia…  
>It was Salia who had saved him.<br>But something inside Damian knew that this could be the end, life poured out of his body along with the blood from the damaged artery, while Salia desperately tried to stop the bleeding.

"Please don't die, young Master, please don't leave me Damian!"

Damian wanted to reach up with his hand and gently wipe away the tears that began to flow, but he was too weak.

This was a dream, right?  
>Salia was dead and he couldn't remember this event at all, this was purely a nightmare, where he died and Salia, someone close to him was there to witness it, completely normal, right?<p>

Right?

Dizziness began to take over and Damian didn't feel like fighting it anymore, for this was only a dream…

"Damian! Don't let go! Don't give in, you have to fight it!"

"Why?" Damian managed to whisper.

"Damian! Please!"

Damian wanted to ask again, but something about Salia's voice was off.  
>It was slowly being deformed.<p>

"Damian!" she yelled again, but this time quieter and weirdly calm, like it was a very bad dubbing.

"Damian, wake up."

Then, Damian recognized the voice, just before he ripped open his eyes and woke up.

His eyes darted around, trying to analyze his situation, where he was, what had happened and if his suspicion would be confirmed.  
>The room he was in was familiar and a warm breeze refreshed the air through a window, letting in the sound and smell of the ocean.<br>When he looked to his right, he was met with cold eyes and a content smile.

"Mother…"

* * *

><p>When Tim entered the house to the Wayne estate, his instincts screamed at him immediately.<br>Something was off.  
>Carefully, he prepared himself for battle and pulled his portable fighting staff out of his bag.<br>He opened the door and was met with a mess.  
>Someone had been here, someone who had not been invited.<br>Quickly, Tim checked the security system for intrusion, but it hadn't gone off, so Bruce was probably not informed.  
>With his staff ready, Tim entered the foyer and listened for any sounds that would indicate another presence, but he heard nothing.<br>When he reached the living room, he was met with a horrible picture that caused his stomach to turn in concern.  
>One of the huge windows was busted and glass shards were strewn across the room, in the entry and further in the room there were blood puddles, but no signs of corpses…<p>

Or Damian.

Whatever had happened here was over.

"Damian?" he called, hoping for some kind of response.

The bad feeling Tim had felt upon entering intensified and he hurried towards the closest entrance to the Bat cave, praying that nothing had happened to the boy.  
>But unfortunately, his prayers weren't answered.<br>The attackers hadn't reached the Cave, that much was clear, but that meant that either they had been eliminated or they had completed their mission before getting here.

When he looked at the security cameras, Damian was nowhere to be seen.

"Shit… shit, shit, shit!"

Tim hurried around the cave, searching for any sign of his adoptive brother, when suddenly he heard a faint noise.  
>It came from a door, not too far away, like a whimper…<br>Carefully, Tim approached it and opened it, and was met with loud growling and barking.

"Oh god, Titus…"

Titus, Damian's dog rested on a gray hoodie, soiled with blood, which was never a good sign.  
>He wanted to approach the dog and help him, but it seemed like even if the dog was hurt, he'd rip Tim apart as soon as he was close enough.<p>

"Calm down, I just want to help you" he said, slowly walking towards the dog.

"We need to find Damian…"

That obviously rang a bell, because Titus began to whimper and stare at the ceiling.  
>Tim knew that there was a secret passage, and Damian had probably dropped the dog from there…<br>Chances were that Damian was injured, hiding, abducted or worse… dead.

Finally, Tim realized that he hadn't contacted Bruce yet.  
>He pulled out his phone and dialled his number quickly.<p>

"Tim?"

"Yes, hi Bruce… we have a problem."

"What happened?"

"I am back at the estate, and someone broke in."

"How? The security system – "

" – Was hacked, but that is the least of our problems."

"Was something stolen? Did they get into the basement?"

"No, I don't think so, but – "

"Did they get to my parents' safe?"

"God damn it Bruce! Damian is gone! There is blood in the living room and Titus is seriously injured."

For a moment, Bruce was silent and Tim wished that the silence would stop and Bruce would finally tell him what to do.

"Did you call him?"

"No…"

"Do that, I will come home immediately."

With that, Bruce hung up and left Tim to call Damian's phone.  
>Weirdly enough, it was occupied.<br>Cursing, Tim put the mobile back into his pocket and tried to approach Titus once more, but it was no use, the dog bared his teeth and looked ready to jump him.

"Okay, I will get something to calm you down, don't worry."

Sighing, he left the room and went upstairs.  
>When he walked past the living room, he heard a strange buzzing sound.<br>He studied the room and noticed a little blinking light under the Christmas tree.  
>At first, he froze and held his breath, afraid that it was a bomb, but when he came closer to inspect it, he saw that it was a mobile phone… Damian's phone.<p>

Quickly, Tim picked up.

"Hello?"

"Finally Da – Wait, is this Tim?"

"Yeah, hi, Dick…"

Dick laughed, obviously not knowing what had happened.

"Funny, at first I wanted to call you, but Dami just hung up on me, so I kept calling him, trying to find out what he was so pissed about.  
>Why do you have his phone anyway?"<p>

"Well, you wouldn't happen to know where he is at the moment, would you?"

Silence.

"What happened?"

Tim sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Someone broke into the estate, wounded Titus and probably took Damian… I am not sure though… I just can't find him…"

"Were there – "

" – Signs of a fight? Yeah, the living room is bloody all over, but no bodies."

"Damian…"

"He fought, Dick, I found Titus. Damian must have at least treated him; he was bandaged and is lying on Damian's favourite hoodie."

"Wait, he's still wherever you found him?"

Tim chuckled a bit embarrassed.

"Well, he wouldn't let me get close enough to move him, he hates me, remember?"

Dick sighed.

"I am on my way anyways, I'll handle him."

"Okay, thanks."

"Wait, Tim… would you know why he was so pissed?"

"I dunno, he should have been in a good mood, it's his birthday after all."

"Oh… shit."

Tim wanted to ask what he meant by that, but Dick had already hung up.

"Idiot…" he sighed and began to clean up the mess, and taking blood samples to analyze them later.

* * *

><p>"Why did you bring me here?"<p>

Talia smiled and leaned back in her chair.

"You are my son, you belong with me… isn't that obvious?"

Unsure whether she was telling the truth, Damian studied her face, but all he saw was the same calculating woman that had been supposed to be his mother.

"You claimed differently, the last time we spoke."

His mother waved it off.

"I was confused. No one could ever replace you, my love."

"You lie. I figure my clone died and you ran out of DNA material?"

The smile on his mother's lips was replaced by a scowl, while Damian tried to climb out of the bed.  
>But he suddenly felt weak and almost fell back into the pillow.<p>

"What the?"

"You have been out for a week, Damian. I think you will need to replenish your strength first."

A week? Shocked, Damian sunk back onto the bed.

"They… didn't?"

"No one came by Damian, Bruce contacted me, but he said that he was fine with you being here, happy even."

Damian was at a loss of words…  
>His father was okay with him being abducted and held prison by his mother?<br>And what about Grayson?  
>Had he tried to bring him back?<p>

"What about – "

"Dick Grayson didn't ask for you Damian, he is really busy. Just be happy that you are back home, why won't you?"

Because this is not my home, Damian thought, but kept silent.  
>It was no use fighting his father's will, and it seemed like he was no longer welcome there, so maybe it'd be for the best to just accept it…<p>

But still, Damian felt betrayed and hurt.  
>All of the time he had spent with them had been for nothing and now he was back to the beginning.<br>Once again one of his parents had thrown him aside like a broken toy…  
>He would just have to cope with the situation like he always did.<p>

After resting for two more days, Damian was finally able to freely walk around the huge palace, set on an Island.  
>He had been raised here for some years, before meeting his mother, so he knew his way around the estate.<br>At first, he wanted to plan an escape, but as soon as he got to the point where he'd get off the island, he found himself clueless as to where he was supposed to go…

His father didn't want him and Grayson had probably already forgotten all about him.

So, after discarding his plans of escape, Damian kept himself busy with training and exercise, hoping to forget about the people who had discarded him so easily, and concentrated on becoming stronger.  
>If he couldn't please his father and was forbidden to do what he wanted, maybe he should work on pleasing his mother…<p>

More weeks passed and slowly, Damian recovered from the emotional blow and got back into shape.  
>The sleeping fits lessened and he felt better than he had for months… well at least physically, but nonetheless, Damian got used to spending his days with his mother, and enjoyed both her attention and the way she'd proudly praise him.<p>

Six weeks with no communication with the Wayne family or his former friends plus the strict training and the old, familiar routine had hardened him quickly.

Then, one night, Damian awoke by the sound of guards dropping in front of his door.  
>He grabbed his dagger that he kept under his pillow, and readied himself for the attack, when the door was opened and a tall man stepped inside.<p>

"Damian?" the man whispered.

The voice made Damian's heart skip a beat and for a moment he was unable to move, but eventually he reminded himself of the training and that this was an intruder and nothing else.  
>He knew that the man was off guard and wouldn't expect hostility, so Damian used the opportunity and threw his dagger quickly, aiming at the man's shoulder.<br>The dagger was dodged quickly, but Damian had used this manoeuvre as a distraction to give him a second to grab the Chinese sword he had stashed next to his bed.  
>Without wasting a second, he charged towards the intruder and used the imbalance to kick him off his feet.<br>When the man hit the ground cursing, Damian held the blade at the man's throat, threatening and stepped on his arms.

"Damian! What – "

"What are you doing here Grayson?"


	14. Fourteenth dream

**A/N: **So, this chapter was really hard to write, so don't hate me if it's not that good XD

Recommended Music: Exit wounds - The script / Promise - Thomas Bergersen(at the end)

* * *

><p>"Dami, I – "<p>

Damian pressed the blade against Dick's throat, drawing blood.  
>He was dressed up as Nightwing.<p>

"Do not call me Dami, I am Damian Al Ghul, and you will address me properly."

Dick's eyes widened in horror and he fought back the urge to tackle the boy and drag him home.  
>What had happened in this time?<br>He thought that upon coming here, Damian would gladly come home…

"What happened?"

"Answer my question first, Grayson. What are you doing here? You have ten seconds before I will call the guards."

When Dick didn't speak up, still confused, Damian began to count.

"One."

"Damian, listen – "

"Two."

"Stop that, let's just talk."

"Three."

"This is stupid!"

"Okay, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, ten, you die."

Dick watched Damian raise his sword, preparing to strike him down, completely confused by the strange behaviour.

"We thought you were dead!" he yelled, and Damian stopped.

Slowly, he lowered his sword and studied Dick suspiciously.

"What?"

Relieved, Dick sighed and looked up into Damian's cautious eyes.

"After what happened back at the estate, we expected a ransom, but nothing came."

"No, you are wrong."

"What are you talking about? We were worried sick! We searched everywhere…"

"That's not true… "

Damian fastened his grip on the sword, his knuckles whitening and his arms tense.  
>It was painful for Dick to see him so torn, so careful not to break down.<br>Talia must have lied to him, he thought, told him some story about them and left him to believe that lie.

"Damian, let me get up and I'll explain it, okay?"

For a moment, Damian looked as if he'd actually cooperate, but eventually, he frowned and shook his head.

"You are lying, if you had been searching for me, you would have found me, and mother told me that she had been talking with father."

"And you believe that?"

Damian blinked confused, but didn't move.

"No."

"Then why – "

"What else was I supposed to do? It wouldn't have been the first time that got tossed away, all I could do was coping with the situation…"

Damian sighed and stepped off Dick, allowing him to get up.

"Leave."

Groaning, Dick got up and smiled weakly.

"Not without you."

Instead of smiling back, Damian frowned and turned around.

"Leave while you can, tell them that I am dead if you want."

"Damian… do you know how hard it was to find you?  
>Especially when Bruce began to believe that you were dead, but I never believed it. I knew you were alive, so please don't let this effort be for nothing."<p>

Still, Damian didn't give in, but at least he turned around and sat down on his bed.

"Grayson, I … I don't want to come home…"

Cautiously, Dick sat down next to Damian careful not to alert him.

"Why?"

Damian sighed and studied his feet.

"I am tired… tired of always having to choose. I know mother is lying to me, and she won't ever love me, but at least it is constantly the same, you know?"

Chuckling, Dick gently placed a hand on Damian's back.

"Stop lying to yourself, you don't mean that."

Frowning, Damian looked up.

"Of course I – "

" – no you don't. You just betrayed yourself."

He received a questioning look.

"You said you wouldn't come home. So that means home is with us, right?"

That seemed to finally work a bit.  
>Maybe he was right, Damian thought, maybe he did want to go… home.<br>But that would mean a lot of more hassle… and his mother would hate him again…  
>What was the thing he wanted more?<br>When he thought about the word home, pictures of the Wayne estate appeared in his mind, the garden, the great halls, his bedroom and of course the living room.  
>The kitchen, were Pennyworth often stood, humming while preparing their meal.<br>He'd always smile when Damian snuck into the kitchen for a snack, despite the orders of his father or when he wanted to get a treat for Titus…

"How is Titus? Is he okay?" Damian asked, suddenly seriously concerned about his friend.

Dick smiled and nodded.

"He is fine, but he misses you. We all do. Colin snapped when he heard about the incident…"

"He did?"

Again, Dick nodded.

"So, what do you think… still won't come home?"

Damian closed his eyes and began to think again.

All the time he had spent with the batfamily had been very special to him.  
>Sometimes it had hurt, and he often wished to be somewhere else, when the differences between him and them had become too obvious, but whenever that had happened, someone had been there to catch him.<br>He was immediately reminded of the dream he once had… after he had been poisoned.

It was true, he was alone sometimes, and he did hate it in fact… but when he needed a shoulder to cry on or a face to punch, they had always been there.  
>His family.<p>

"Damian…"

Damian almost jumped when he felt warm fingers on his cheek, wiping away tears he hadn't known were there.

"I want to go home…" he said, his voice weak.

"Okay, let's go…"

* * *

><p>"Hey – OUCH!"<p>

Tim hit the wall, Damian's foot in his face, the moment they had stepped outside.  
>Damian drew back his foot and stared up at Tim, confused and surprised.<p>

"What are you doing here Drake?" he whispered sharply.

"Do you really think that we'd miss the chance to get you?" said a voice behind him.

Damian turned around and met the cold eyes of the batcowl.

"Father…"

A moment of silence passed, before Bruce leaned down and wrapped his arms around his son.

"I'm glad you are fine."

Damian smiled into his father's shoulder and returned the hug.

"Thanks…"

Tim groaned, covering his bleeding nose.

"Yeah, yeah, I won't expect an apology. Let's just get out of here."

Dick nodded and watched Damian draw back, smiling slightly.

"Damian, do you know a good way out? We were dropped here and the Batwing is waiting above the island, we just need to pass the coordinates."

"We can leave through an underground tunnel. It leads to the back of the island. I can send the coordinates if you want."

After some seconds of Damian passing through the coordinates, the group began following the hallway to their left.  
>They had to take out some of the guards, but made it to the underground tunnel without causing enough commotion to alarm Talia.<p>

Or at least that's what they had thought.

As soon as they reached an underground hall that led to the tunnel, they were met by a group of assassins standing in front of Talia.  
>Instantly, Dick stepped in front of Damian and held his arm up protectively.<p>

"Bruce, darling… what brings you here?" Talia cooed.

"Talia, long time no see" he answered neutrally.

"Let us pass" Dick growled.

"Oh, I am afraid I can't. Damian is my son, he belongs with his mother."

Damian wanted to speak up, but Dick already beat him to it.

"That is not up for you to decide, you are a horrible mother! The only thing you managed was to ruin his childhood!"

Even though Dick was defending Damian, somehow the said ended up hurting him, because it meant that he was still a degenerated freak, trained to become a demon…

"Grayson…"

"Oh and you are such a great parent? He didn't seem to be overly attached to you. I mean he didn't even put up a fight. He never mentioned you either."

Dick chuckled and looked over his shoulder, down at Damian.

"So what? I care enough for the both of us."

Sighing, Talia flicked her hand.

"Unfortunately I can't let you leave with him, I still need him. Men! Get them!"

Her henchmen shot towards the group, but were intercepted when Drake assaulted them from the side.  
>While Bruce and Tim began to surround the assassins, Dick pulled out his electric Eskrima sticks, grinning smugly and Damian charged towards them frontally.<p>

Instead of joining the brawl, Dick used his grapple hook to swing over them and attack Talia directly.  
>With a confident smile on her lips, Talia dodged the attack and pulled the sword that hung from her hip.<p>

"So you really want to fight me, Grayson? Bad decision."

Almost too fast to see, Talia began to attack Dick, who barely managed to block her attacks.  
>She was incredibly strong and fast, but Dick was waiting for the right moment to strike back.<br>It came, when one of the assassins came flying in their direction and Talia had to dodge him.  
>Quickly, Dick stepped closer, digging his fist into her stomach, kicking her feet away and grabbing her hair with the other hand, but instead of dropping to the floor, Talia braced herself on Dick's shoulder, pulling herself up.<br>She jumped, using Dick's legs as a lever and spun around in the air, hair still caught in Dick's iron grip.  
>When she landed on the floor with her left foot, she instantly used her right to land a kick into his ribs, causing him to let go.<p>

For a moment, both stared at each other, slightly out of breath, yet still focused.

Talia picked up her sword, not once taking her eyes off her enemy.  
>This was going to be interesting, she thought, raising an eyebrow.<p>

* * *

><p>Bruce was slightly bored.<br>He had fought against the league of shadows way too often to consider them a serious threat anymore.  
>Their organized acts of terrorism were still threatening and seriously a pain in the ass, while the henchmen seemed to become more and more unable to learn how to fight against a superior enemy.<br>They simply didn't use their instincts anymore; instead, they used several trained combos that would never work against an enemy with faster reflexes.

He was just finishing off one of them, when he saw Dick, engaged in a serious fight with Talia.  
>Smiling, Bruce watched them, while grabbing a short assassin who had planned to brush past him by the collar, before he could ambush Tim.<p>

Tim turned around and thanked him, when he was forced back by another guy.

It was hard to keep the overview, and for a moment, Damian disappeared out of his field of vision.  
>Worried, Bruce looked around.<p>

Then, suddenly he saw a flash of yellow, a bit outside of the group.  
>Damian was wrestling with a tall man, his back to Dick who was being forced back by Talia.<p>

A bad feeling caused Bruce's heart to skip a beat, when Talia prepared for the next strike.

"TALIA! Don't!" he yelled, but it was too late…

Dick groaned, tired by the constant strikes he had to dodge, when he heard Bruce yell something over the crowd.  
>He didn't hear it, focused on rolling to the side before Talia pierced her sword through his lungs.<p>

But what happened after would never leave his memory.

Talia's face suddenly changed and horror replaced her smug smile, when the sound of flesh being pierced was heard, and a scream ripped apart the sounds of fighting.

Dick turned his head and followed the blade with his eyes, and when he saw where it ended, it was as if time stood still.

The blade ran deep into the chest of Damian, who stood there, eyes ripped open in surprise and his mouth still open from the scream.  
>He looked down and saw the end of the sword, covered in blood reaching out of his ribcage.<p>

Shocked, Talia let go of the sword and stepped back, while the fighting suddenly ceased and all eyes rested on Damian.  
>Dick was the first to move, when Damian began to cough and his knees gave in.<p>

"Dami!" he yelled as he caught the boy.

The movement caused the general stupor to cease and the others began to move, while the assassins simply rested immobilized, not sure how to react.  
>Bruce hurried to his son's side, while Tim rushed past the assassins and used the state of shock Talia was in, to knock her out with his fighting staff.<br>He held her down, gritting his teeth and turning his head to look at Dick who tightly held Damian.

"Damian, stay awake!" Dick shouted at the boy, whose eyelids began to flutter.

Violent coughs began to shake him and blood gushed out of his mouth, covering his lips and leaving drops on both Dick's and Bruce's face.

Dick wanted to rip the sword out of Damian, but he was held back by Bruce.

"His lungs are punctured, it's the only thing keeping them from collapsing right now."

Dick ripped down his mask angrily and glared at Bruce, before looking back down at Damian, tears beginning to gather in his eyes.

He knew that it wasn't Bruce's fault, but he wanted to yell at him so badly… wanted to blame someone, but in the end, he was the one to blame.

"Gray… son" Damian whispered between coughs.

"Damian, please don't talk. We will take care of it, just stay awake please."

"I am … tired"

"Hang in there Damian" Bruce said, gently brushing strands of hair out of Damian's face.

Wait, Damian thought, this was kind of familiar.

"Bruce" Tim called "What are we going to do? Can we move him?"

Bruce didn't reply, but simply held Damian's hand and gently stroked his hair.

"Do you want something against the pain, Damian?"

Instantly, Dick looked up and gave Bruce a terrified look.

"He mustn't fall asleep Bruce! Let's move him."

"We can't, Dick."

Careful not to hurt Damian, Dick shifted the boy so that Damian's head rested against his shoulder.

He felt the warm blood from Damian's back, staining his suit.

"Of course we can… we have to, right?"

Turning his head, he searched for support from Tim, but his brother avoided his eyes, staring at the ground.

"He has been through worse, Bruce… his spine got shattered…"

Bruce shook his head, eyes focused on the weak breathing of his son.

"But this is not a bone that has been fractured. His lungs are seriously injured and we can't move the blade… his… heart may even be affected."

Suddenly, Damian gasped and clenched his eyes shut.

"Dami!"

Dick pulled him closer.

The helplessness was written all over his face, and Bruce placed a hand on his shoulder.

"Dick, he's in pain."

"I'm not giving up!" Dick yelled at him, shaking off his hand and causing Damian to whimper.

"Damian, please… don't let go, don't give in! I beg you Damian."

Now Damian remembered why this felt so familiar… his dream.  
>It was just like in his dream only that Grayson was here, talking to him, instead of Salia.<br>But this time, it was real… he was dying.

Tears began to run down Damian's cheeks and he squeezed his father's hand.  
>He didn't want to die…<p>

Slowly, the pain began to cease and the voices became distant.  
>He opened his eyes and watched Grayson's face cringe in pain.<br>His mouth was moving, but Damian couldn't make out the words…  
>With all of his strength, Damian began to speak, but he noticed that no words came out.<br>He wanted to say goodbye, to yell at Grayson for crying like a wuss… to tell them that he'd be fine…  
>But he couldn't…<p>

He was so tired…

* * *

><p>Tim had been watching the whole time, feeling sick and unable to help…<p>

It was painful to watch Dick desperate and pleading like this, but the strike had been vital, and Damian probably wouldn't make it.  
>The blank look on Bruce's face only confirmed his fear.<p>

Suddenly, the assassins, who had been quiet the whole time, began to move.  
>They headed towards Tim, who was still watching over he unconscious Talia.<p>

He lowered the staff and pointed at her throat, giving them a threatening look.

"If you step any closer, I will crush her neck" he said, calmly but firm.

And indeed, he wished they'd step closer, giving him a reason to kill the witch…

But they stopped.  
>They probably knew that it wasn't wise to tempt him in the current situation.<p>

* * *

><p>"Damian?"<p>

Dick watched tears escaping Damian's closed eyes.

"No, no, no!"

In his panic, Dick began to softly shake Damian, but was stopped by Bruce.

"You are making it worse…"

"No, he needs to stay awake."

Bruce sighed and focused back on Damian, who slowly opened his eyes.

He fought back the tears when he saw the confusion and innocence in his son's eyes.  
>Damian didn't deserve to die so young, but he was beyond help at this point…<br>All Bruce could do, was calm him down and be by his side right now… afterwards, he'd pick up Dick and Tim.  
>He'd try to mend their broken hearts before even thinking about himself.<p>

Dick let out a sob when Damian began to move his lips, but no sounds came out.

It was torture for Dick to see Damian like this, but somewhere in his mind, he knew that it was too late, he just didn't want to accept it.  
>He wanted to say something, when suddenly, Damian began to tremble and then went limp in his arms.<br>His head rolled to the side and his eyes closed.

Tim looked up from the floor, when he heard Dick's cry.  
>The moment he saw them, his throat went dry instantly, and his heart stopped.<br>A lifeless Damian lay in Dick's arms, who was holding him close and cried into the black hair.

Bruce kneeled next to them, his head low, and still holding one of Damian's hands.

Suddenly, something moved underneath his staff, and Tim saw that Talia had woken up.

"Stay down" he hissed, pressing her down.

She didn't fight him, her stare was blank and for the first time, it looked like she was really hurt by the loss of her son.

"He's dead… right?"

Tim glared at her, but eventually nodded.

He wanted to give her a full answer when he was pushed away and fell to the ground.

"Dick!" Bruce yelled, but it was too late.

Dick grabbed Talia by the throat, her bloody sword in hand, and raised her up.

"You bitch!" he said, his voice unusually cold and calm.

"Tell me where it is."

Even if Talia wanted to answer, Dick's grip on her throat was too firm and she couldn't utter a sound.

"WHERE IS IT?!" he shouted into her face and tightened his grip until she almost fainted again.

With a disgusted look on his face, he dropped her, just to pick her up again, grabbing her long hair.

"Where is the Lazarus Pit?"

Talia looked up into his eyes, frightened by the bloodlust in them.

"Woman, I don't mind killing you and ripping you to shreds, not necessarily in that order, so tell me!"

Silently, Talia pointed towards a wall, which looked no different than the others.  
>Tim took the hint and ran ahead, searching the wall for triggers or any kind of entry.<p>

"Let me go" Talia said, when Dick raised her sword.

"This is the blood of your child… and I promise you one thing, if this doesn't work, I will skin you, filet you and serve you to Titus while you can still feel everything."

Fear crept into her face and she felt relief, as soon as she heard the mechanism of the door.

"I got it" Tim called, standing in front of a huge door.

Dick dropped Talia and hurried towards Bruce, who was holding Damian's corpse.  
>Without asking for permission, he snatched Damian out of his father's arms and hurried towards the door.<br>He would never allow Damian to leave like this…

* * *

><p>"Damian, wake up."<p>

Slowly, Damian opened his eyes and blinked repeatedly, trying to clear his blurred vision.

Was he dead?

He jumped when he felt a soft hand gently squeezing his shoulder.

"Damian."

Slowly turning his head, Damian froze when he saw the person talking to him.

"Salia…"

Smiling, his maid shrugged and reached up to caress his cheek.

"It's been a long time, Damian."

A lump formed in Damian's throat and he fought back the urge to hug her.  
>It wasn't all happiness, but her being here meant that he was either dreaming or dead, and given the earlier events, he bet on the latter.<p>

"I am dead… right?"

Salia smiled sadly and nodded.

"I'm sorry Damian… I wished not to see you for many more years."

He lowered his head.

"I can understand… I mean I killed you, no wonder you wouldn't – "

"I didn't mean that Damian" Salia cut him off.

"What I meant was, that I didn't wish for you to end up dead so early in your life. I never blamed you for it."

Damian let out a bitter laugh.

"I was the one to kill you; your blood is on my hands…"

Salia shook her head and cupped his face.

"It's on your mother's hands, and she didn't know any better Damian. She was raised the way she is raising you."

"Was…"

Surprised, his dead maid cocked her head.

"Was?"

Damian nodded.

"Yeah, I currently live… was living… with my father."

The thought was enough to cause his voice to die and his eyes to fill up with tears.  
>Father, Pennyworth, Grayson and even Drake were gone forever…<br>Well, he was gone, but still, he'd never see them again.

Pictures of them flashed into his mind and he began to cry silently, allowing Salia to gently stroke his back.  
>He remembered everything he had been through with the people he had come to love and respect, that had showed him that he was not merely a weapon, but a child that deserved to beloved.<p>

Like he had heard many times, his life began to flash in front of his inner eye, but suddenly something different happened…

A green light began to blind him and he felt something wet on his body.  
>Worried, he looked down at himself, but he was completely dry.<br>Then, his breathing sped up without any comprehensible reason…  
>Damian began to panic and looked at Salia, who just stared at him, a concerned look on her face.<p>

Again, the green light, it was pulsing and became more frequent as seconds passed.

He saw a face; blue eyes… felt hands grabbing him, pulling him… voices calling.  
>Everything began to blur again and his head felt dizzy as if everything was spinning, before the world went black.<p>

Not even an instant later, he inhaled, swallowing water.  
>The voices became louder and he was able to make out parts of words.<p>

"… him! …ce…I'll…et…them."

Then the hands pulled him and he felt something warm at his side, too exhausted to open his eyes again.  
>Damian felt that he was being moved, or rather someone moved him.<br>A sharp sound was heard and suddenly they were pulled out of the water.  
>Just when they hit something cold, Damian blacked out again.<p>

* * *

><p>"He got him!" Tim shouted over at Bruce who was trying to keep the instable pillar that had covered up the pit from collapsing.<p>

"Bruce, they can't get out, I'll get them."

He shot into the ceiling with his grapple hook and swung to the pit, where Dick was trying to get Damian out of the water.

When he was close enough, Tim grabbed Dick, and swung back to the safe ground, finally allowing Bruce to let go.

The pillar collapsed and buried the Lazarus pit.

Dick was panting, but tried to get up again, carefully rolling Damian on his back.

"He swallowed water…"

Tim nodded and began working on getting the water out of his lungs.

He only stopped, when Damian began to cough and spat out water, directly into Tim's face…

Bruce hurried to his son and steadied his back, holding him up.

"Damian? Damian, are you there?"

Slowly, Damian opened his eyes and took in his surroundings.  
>It was a dark cave, almost completely buried under rubble…<p>

He looked to his right and met his father's eyes.

"Father…"

Bruce smiled and rested his forehead against Damian's head, letting out a relieved sigh.

"Welcome back, son."

When Bruce drew back, Drake sat down next to him, smiling at Damian.

"Hi there."

Damian wanted to answer, when suddenly he was pulled out of Bruce's arms and found himself wrapped in familiar arms.

Dick held Damian tightly, afraid to find him dead when he let go, and buried his head in Damian's shoulder.  
>After getting over the shock from the assault, Damian encircled Dick's waist with his skinny arms and allowed himself to smile into Dick's shoulder.<p>

"Dick, I know you don't want to hear this, but we need to get going…" Bruce said, placing a shoulder on his eldest's shoulder.

Dick sighed and let go of Damian, at least for a second before he picked him up.

"What are you?!" Damian protested, despite feeling completely drained.

"I can walk on my own!"

Chuckling Dick nodded towards Bruce and Tim, telling them to go ahead.

"Yeah of course… prove it" he said to Damian, gently letting his feet drop to the ground for Damian to stand.

Stubborn as he was, Damian tried to make a step, but his knees gave in immediately.  
>Smiling, Dick caught him and swung him back up into his arms.<p>

"Carrying it is, little man."

Annoyed and embarrassed, Damian huffed, before yawning loudly.

He felt himself getting dizzy and he let his head fall against Dick's chest.

"Dami?"

"Hmm?" Damian murmured.

"Promise me to wake up again, okay?"

Damian looked up.

"Do you remember what you promised me?"

Giving him a questioning look, Dick shook his head.

"You promised not to die before me… I guess you kept it… for that, I will wake up again, okay?"

Dick smiled sadly and nodded pulling Damian a bit closer as the boy began to fall asleep.

But just before he dozed off completely, Damian opened his eyes once again.  
>He wanted to tell Grayson something, something he had wanted to tell him the moment he was dying, and regretted not having said it back then…<p>

"Grayson… I…"

Without looking down, Dick smiled.

"What?"

"I… I really want to get out of here" Damian said, feeling his cheeks heat up.

"Walk faster."

Dick laughed and shook his head as he carried Damian out of the passage and through the hall.  
>Talia had already fled with her henchmen, so they had no problems reaching the exit.<p>

Damian had already fallen asleep, so Dick took the opportunity and gently hugged the boy again.

Today, Damian had died and been brought back to life… Dick promised himself to never let that happen again, he could never go through that again…  
>He loved Damian way too much…<p> 


	15. A little message for you

Hello guys and gals :D

First of all, I want to apologize for the long absence.  
>It was rude and I didn't answer all the pm I received, which annoys me myself, that's why I decided to write this little rant for you.<br>As an apology and an explanation for my long absence.

**I am working on the last(maybe) chapter of this story and I am planning on uploading it tomorrow.**

So, why was I gone for so long?  
>Why did I stop writing?<p>

Last year was probably the worst year of my life, and I can't write as long as my mind is occupied with really big problems.  
>I finished my school and apprenticeship this week, something that took a huge load of weight off my shoulders, but school was the least of my problems.<p>

I lost two of the most important persons in my life and I still dearly miss them, but they always told me how they loved my stories, so now I'll continue, partly in their honour, because I couldn't get myself to write a single sentence before, as it always made me think about them.

I am only twenty, and have been through stuff this year that I hopefully never have to experience again.

But since all of this is now behind me, I decided to pick up the pen (or keyboard) again.  
>I made Caught in a dream my priority, since it's my longest story and I became quite attached to it as well.<br>That Damian died in the comic was a huge heartbreak for me :'( I will always keep pretending that he's alive until he comes back :)

I also want to start a new storyline with our favourite little devil (sorry kid devil/red devil, not your turn yet ;) ), and I have planned several other stories.

So without further talk, I want to announce my return and hope I didn't lose too many readers.  
>I'll get back to working on the chapter now, and apologize once again.<p>

**I am sorry and I love you all :)**

Cheers  
>Jessica a.k.a. bloodyXwhiteXrabbit<p> 


	16. Waking up

**A/N:**

**Hi everyone :)  
>First I want to thank everyone for the encouraging words :) And yes, life is getting better, so I consider myself back in the saddle again, or at least more than I was some time ago :)<strong>

**Sorry that it wasn't up yesterday, my PC was working up, but now everything's fine.  
>I decided that this is not the last chapter, but the first part of the end, since it would have been too long as one chapter.<strong>

**I don't own anything and hope you like it, even though I feel a bit rusty XD**

* * *

><p><em>Grey…<em>  
><em>Everything seemed so grey.<em>  
><em>Batman clenched his teeth as he soared through Gotham City's sky, staring at his own reflection in a building.<em>

_Only days ago, his huge shadow had been accompanied by a smaller, brighter shadow, grinning at him. He would always see a flash of red, no matter where he went… The red shadow would light up the dark night, letting Batman's heart swell with pride and love, and sometimes with fear…_

_The fear to lose control…_  
><em>The fear to lose the shadow…<em>

_But now everything was black and grey, as if all the colour had been washed out of the world, only returning occasionally._  
><em>Whether as an illusion seen in reflections, hallucinations brought forth by the craving to get things back to how they were, or as the blood that dripped from his victims as he struck them down without mercy.<em>

_His shadow…_  
><em>His companion…<em>  
><em>His son…<em>  
><em>Was gone, forever.<em>

Bruce woke with a start, barely able to hold back a scream.  
>When he looked around the room, he realized that he was still in bed.<br>His room was dark and cold, almost suffocating.  
>Despite knowing that it had been a dream, he quickly got out of bed and hurried out of the room.<br>He didn't stop until he reached Damian's room.

For a moment he considered knocking, but he didn't want to wake the boy up for nothing, so he silently opened the door and entered the room.  
>The room was tidy and perfectly kept as always, the only difference was the amount of get well cards and a little bouquet of flowers, signed by the titans, that stood on the desk.<p>

The mat Damian usually slept on, was empty, causing Bruce's heart to skip a beat. Had it really been a dream? Was Damian –

"Father"

Bruce looked over to the king size bed, where the tired voice had come from.  
>Blue eyes stared at him out of the darkness.<br>Slowly, Damian sat up in the bed, rubbing his eyes sleepily. Now, Bruce noticed that Titus had been sleeping next to Damian, blocking the small boy from his view.

Smiling softly, he made his way over to the bed and sat down on the edge.

A bit confused, Damian eyed his father.

"Is something wrong?"

Bruce shook his head.

"No, everything is fine… I just –" but he didn't finish.

"Are you okay, Damian?"

Groaning a bit, Damian nodded.

"Except for being woken in the middle of the night, yeah, I am fine."

Bruce chuckled.

"Yeah, sorry about that"

He got up to leave, when his wrist was caught by Damian.

"Was there something you wanted? Surely you wouldn't wake me for nothing."

For a moment, Bruce considered lying, but when he looked into his son's confused eyes, pictures of the dream came back to his mind.  
>The thought of losing his son was too much.<br>He had almost lost him a few days back, and the one thing he had regretted the most in those minutes, had been the lack of conversations between them.  
>The things that had been left unspoken and had always been obvious for Bruce, may not have been as clear to Damian, so he sat down, gently nudging Titus off the bed.<p>

"I had a dream today, a nightmare, and you were dead. I came to check on you."

Damian looked down at the blanket, strangely calm.

"I don't understand."

"What don't you understand?"

The boy looked up again, but avoided to look into his father's eyes.

"I drive you crazy all the time, I go against orders and do things you strictly forbid… wouldn't you be happier without me?"

Bruce sighed and pulled his legs up on the bed, so that he was sitting right next to Damian, Back to the wall.  
>He felt his son scoot away slightly, so he put an arm around his shoulders to keep him in place, squeezing him gently until he relaxed.<p>

"Do you want to know what the dream was about?"

"I was dead… you already told me."

"But I never saw you die, all I knew was that suddenly the world was grey, and there was a hole I couldn't quite describe."

Damian smiled weakly.

"That sounds cheesy…"

"But that's exactly what it was…"

Bruce looked down at his son, and for once, Damian didn't look away.

"No matter how many times you disobey me, no matter how much trouble you cause, all of that vanishes as soon as your life is endangered.  
>I almost lost you back there… I have already lost many people, Damian, and I don't ever want to lose you. Understood?"<p>

Damian nodded slowly, when Bruce leaned in to kiss his son's forehead.

"Now go back to sleep, sorry for waking you."

A bit flustered, Damian simply nodded again and disappeared under the blanket, while Bruce left the room.  
>Outside the door, Bruce took a deep breath.<br>He was too awake to go back to sleep himself now, so he walked towards his study.  
>At least he could finish some paperwork undisturbed at this time.<p>

* * *

><p>Three hours later<p>

*Knock* *Knock*

Surprised to be disturbed this early in the morning, Bruce looked up from his desk in his study and set down the papers he had been working on.

"Come in."

Slowly, the door opened and Tim entered the room, dressed in sweatpants and a white shirt.  
>He looked more than uncomfortable to be here, and Bruce wondered why he would get up this early to talk to him.<p>

"Is everything all right, Tim?"

Tim looked up, kinda surprised and smiled at Bruce as he walked over to the armchair that stood on the other side of the big desk.

"Yeah, I'm okay."

Bruce nodded and leant back in his chair.

"I just have a little problem that keeps bugging me, I guess" Tim continued.

When nothing followed, Bruce cleared his throat and studied his son's face, trying to catch a glimpse of what might be bothering him.

"About what?"

Tim sighed and scratched his neck.

"It's about Damian…"

"Did he do something?" Bruce asked, carefully.

Instantly, Tim shook his head.

"Nah, he has been normal, you know? A brat and all, but he didn't try to kill me recently, so I guess he's even been better than before?"

"Then what is it?"

"His party… you know his secret 'welcome back from the dead' slash 'late birthday party' thingy."

Bruce raised his eyebrow, waiting to hear the actual problem.  
>Tim groaned and slumped down a bit.<p>

"I just don't know what to do about it! Damian isn't really fond of me and I honestly don't want to ruin it for him, but if I even try to skip it, Dick is going to have my head for sure."

Chuckling, Bruce leant forward shrugged.

"Just don't ruin it for him."

"Ha!" Tim laughed sarcastically.

"That's easier said then done. He is going to provoke me for sure…"

"Then bribe him."

Confused, Tim squinted at Bruce.

"Bribe him? With what?"

Smiling, Bruce got up and went over to one of the antique dressers, as Tim followed him with his eyes.  
>Bruce opened the lowest drawer with care and pulled out a little something that looked like a plush toy.<br>It was worn and old, but Tim could see that it resembled something like a bat.

"You should know this, right?"

Bruce smiled as he carefully placed it into Tim's hands.

"This little plush toy has become a bit of a tradition here, and I think it's the greatest gift you could give to Damian."

Tim was still confused, why would Damian like this?

"I never figured him to be the guy to like plushies…"

"He doesn't like them. But he will get the gesture behind it."

Grinning a bit, Tim looked up.

"Which would be…?"

"That you, the one to always question his position in this family – "

" – Hey! I – " Tim interrupted, before Bruce held up a hand and silenced him.

"- If someone like you were to give him a toy that would, in a way, tell him that he is now an official member of this family, it would mean that you accept him. I think nothing could ever top that."

Slowly nodding, Tim studied the plush toy.

"Then a Bat-Kitty it will be…"

* * *

><p>This was so surreal…<p>

Dick stood outside of a make-a-bear shop and glanced through the huge window, not really believing what he saw.  
>A highly uncomfortable Timothy Drake stood there, surrounded by kids and staring mums, trying to cover his face with big sunglasses, while one of the employees showed him around.<br>For a moment, Dick fought the urge to grab his phone and shoot some pictures, but that wouldn't be fair…  
>Especially because he couldn't really get a good angle from here, and it would honestly not do the situation any justice, so chuckling to himself, he got inside and sneaked up to Tim.<p>

"I really thought you had outgrown plush animals by now, Timmy."

Sighing, Tim turned away from the employee and glared at Dick, well at least his eyebrows indicated a glare…

"Ha Ha, you are hilarious, Richard."

Dick grinned and shrugged.

"Seriously, what are you doing here? Gotten a new girlfriend you are trying to impress by showing her a plushie collection?"

Groaning, he turned away and walked over to a little shelf, filled with tiny costumes from several superheroes, his big brother on his heels.

"She's into superheroes? Wow, but I don't see a Red – "

"DICK!" Tim almost yelled, spinning on his heels to face the wide grin.

He wanted to continue, when he noticed that all eyes were on him and the some mothers were covering their children's ears, staring at him completely shocked.

"Oh god" Tim said, "No, I didn't mean that!"

He pointed at Dick.

"His name is Richard, and… and we sometimes…"

But it was useless, the people only shook their heads and tried to keep their distance, while Dick was trying hard not to burst into laughter.

"See what you have done now?" Tim asked.

"I see that you can be great at making a fool out of yourself, now what are you doing here?"

Tim sighed defeated and leant against the shelf.

"It's for Damian…"

Suddenly, the grin vanished from Dick's face.

"You are joking, right?"

Tim only shrugged, slightly unsettled by Dick's change.

"He's going to have your head for that."

"Bruce said that – "

"No, Tim, I mean, Damian is literally going to have your head for that.  
>If you give him a plushie in front of everyone, he is going to climb your window at night, cut off your head and fill it with plush… believe me, he will."<p>

As if he was imagining it, Dick raised his eyebrows and looked to the side.

"No, Bruce said that it would be a symbol of accep – "

" – Maybe he'll even add a tiny bow…"

Tim grabbed Dick's shoulders and shook him lightly.

"Di… I mean, Richard, stop it. Damian won't do that, now get out of here, you make everything so much worse…"

With that, he turned Dick around and gently pushed him towards the exit.

"Mhmm, definitely a pink bow."

"Just go!"

Before Dick was out of the store, he looked over his shoulders and squinted his eyes at Tim.

"Don't come to me when you can't find your head anymore Timothy!"

As soon as the door closed, Tim buried his face in his hands.

"Oh my god, please just kill me before the party."

* * *

><p>It was a Saturday morning, when Damian slowly stepped into the kitchen and decided that something was definitely off.<br>No greeting Alfred…  
>No grumbling Drake…<br>No breakfast…

He glanced around to see whether there had been any changes since he had last seen the kitchen, but there was no difference at all.  
>For a split second, Damian remembered the last time he had felt this alarmed in his own house, and yes this was to become his house eventually.<br>Drake would have to pry it from his cold dead hands!

He positioned his back to the wall and let out a sharp whistle, focused on getting Titus to his side as quick as possible.  
>The dog had been through enough because of him, he'd take care of him now.<p>

It didn't take more than four seconds until the Dane shot around the corner and approached Damian, tail wagging and heckling contently.  
>Damian grabbed Titus' collar and gently drew him closer.<p>

"You don't seem alarmed at all boy."

The Dane barked and licked Damian's hand before staring at the entrance of the kitchen, excited.  
>There was obviously something up, but it didn't seem to be dangerous, that was until Damian heard a noise from the entrance and a cocky voice.<p>

"Well maybe he should be!"

Just before Damian was able to move, a man jumped into the kitchen and shot at Damian at the same time.  
>The little dart hit Damian in the neck, immediately injecting some kind of sedative.<p>

It only took a second to knock the boy out.

"… Ja-son! Sonofabi…" was all that Damian managed to whisper weakly before his knees gave out and he lost his consciousness.

Jason charged forward to catch the young Robin before he hit his head on the counter.

"Sweet dreams little demon."

He heard someone enter the kitchen behind him.

"God damn it Jason! Did you have to do it like that? he'll be furious the second he wakes up…"

Dick walked around the cooking isle to pick Damian out of Jason's arms, gently throwing him over his shoulder.

"Yeah, like a Tasmanian Devil! It'll be hilarious."

Upon imagining Damian furious and foaming like the brown cartoon figure, Dick couldn't help but chuckle at the fitting image.

"Let's just get him out of here…"

* * *

><p>"Oh my god! He's just too cute like this…"<p>

Stephanie Brown stared at Damian, who had been tied up to a solid chair for everyone's safety.  
>He was fast asleep, looking as innocent as possible.<p>

"Can't we keep him like that?"

Smiling, she looked over her shoulder, where the people were busy hanging up decorations and preparing tables for the guests.  
>Connor, who had been walking by with a bunch of boxes laughed at the remark.<p>

"I think 90% of the guests wish for that to happen."

"What about the other 10%?" she asked, turning away from Damian.

Connor shrugged.

"99% of those probably want to see him gone for good."

"HEY!"

Stephanie and Connor both looked to the side where a huge man stared down at both of them, obviously upset.

"No one here wants Damian dead! And if you didn't like him, you wouldn't be here… wait, are you Superboy?"

The man's voice had changed from angry and challenging to meek and intimidated in a matter of seconds, and suddenly, the man began to shrink as well, causing his clothes to hang from his tiny shoulders.

Connor stared down at the now little boy and nodded a bit confused, while Stephanie laughed loudly.

"Colin! Don't worry, we were just kidding. Connor, meet Colin, he's also Abuse, in case you've heard of him."

Having regained his composure, Connor smiled and nodded towards the boxes in his hands.

"I would shake your hand now, but I'm a bit occupied."

Colin shook his head shyly and stepped closer to Stephanie.

"It's okay."

Suddenly, they heard someone call for Connor.

"Kon! We need the decorations now!" Tim called from the other side of the hall.

Smiling, Connor nodded one last time and turned to leave.

"Well Colin," Steph began, not looking at the boy.

"How about you change into something your size and not ripped apart?"

Flushed and embarrassed, the little redhead nodded and took off.

"What a party…" Stephanie said grinning, throwing one last glance at the sleeping Damian.

"You sure are loved."

* * *

><p>The preparations of the party continued to go smoothly, when all of a sudden the sound of breaking glass ripped apart the cheerful atmosphere and all eyes rested on Dick who stood at the entrance, arm still raised.<p>

Before him, stood a woman, who had barely managed to dodge the crystal bowl that had been thrown at her, as soon as she had entered the hall.

"If you don't get out of here within the next five seconds, I'm going to rip you apart woman…"

Bruce, who had hurried to Dick's side tried to hold his son back.

"Dick, calm down, I invited – "

Immediately, Dick whipped his head around and glared at Bruce.

"You invited her?! She killed your son! Remember?!"

Talia didn't dare to move an inch, while assessing whether to stay or to get the hell out of here.

"She is still Damian's mother."

"I don't care! Five seconds… five "

Bruce sighed.

"Richard…"

"Four… three…"

Talia cleared her throat and held up a hand.

"How about we let our son decide?"

Dick shook his head and chuckled coldly.

"Forget it, two…"

"Dick, you are being unreasonably selfish…" Bruce said

"Damian should decide whether she can attend or not. Talia, " he turned to look at her

"Wait in a café or something, and I'll call you as soon as Damian is awake."

Talia nodded and left immediately, leaving a furious Richard back.  
>Dick was about to yell at Bruce, when he was interrupted by a Jason calling from where Damian sat.<p>

"CODE RED! Demon seed is waking up! I repeat: CODE RED, this is not a test!"

Bruce and Dick both sighed and hurried over to Jason, while Bruce ordered everyone to finish up quickly.  
>After about ten seconds, thanks to the speedsters, everything was ready and the glass had been cleaned up.<p>

* * *

><p>Damian felt nothing but a heavy head…<p>

The sedative had been strong, because his tolerance against any kind of sedatives was pretty high, yet it seemed to have been quite some time since he had gotten attacked by Jason this morning.  
>He wasn't surprised to feel constriction at all, but what he heard was a bit weird.<br>All around him, he heard noises, people chatting, hurrying about…  
>Despite being awake, he kept playing the sleeping boy, allowing the sedative to wear off some more, to be able to fight right away if necessary.<p>

Suddenly, he felt the presence of someone just inches away from his face.

"I know you're awake Damian…"

Jason's voice…

After that, Jason drew back and began shouting.

"I'm sorry Damian, but you woke up a bit too early."

Damian wanted to protest, but all of a sudden, he was blindfolded, gagged and something was put over his ears to drown out any kind of sound.

What the heck was going on?

For a good minute, he couldn't hear or see anything, and slowly, it was making him rather nervous…  
>Then, without a warning, the thing that had covered his ears disappeared, as well as the gag and the blindfold.<p>

Before even opening his eyes, Damian began to curse.

"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU TODD! You stupid – "

He stopped the moment he opened his eyes, and the whole room seemed to explode into colours and happy cheers.  
>Banners and balloons were everywhere, all carrying the same words.<p>

_"HAPPY BIRTHDAY DAMIAN!"_

It was weird, everyone was smiling at him, even Bruce had a wide smile on his face…  
>So many people were here… most of the justice league, almost all the teen titans…<p>

Damian couldn't help but stare at them.  
>Slowly, the cheers died down and everyone looked at Damian expectantly, as if he was supposed to do something…<br>But Damian had no idea how to react.

He didn't even know how he felt about it.

What the heck was he supposed to do at a time like this?


End file.
